Giving birth without DH to hold my hand

[dickiedoodah]

Hi, my first baby is due at the end of September and my DH may not be able to make it to the birth. Just wondering if anyone could offer some words of wisdom/comfort/advice if you've been in a situation where you've had to go it alone.

Why can't he make it?

I threw DH out half way through the first time, as he was very stressed. We agreed to leave him at home second time, and I took a friend. It was great - bit like a really mad Girl's Night Out!

My dh will not be with me at this birth. We live overseas, and I came back to England to stay with his parents, and have the baby, as I was not comfortable with the care I was getting. He will not arrive for about a month.

My SIL has offered to come to the birth, but I am in the process of hiring a doula just in case.

If I was in my home country, I would be fine, but I am a hit nervous being around only my inlaws. I just have to remind myself the important thing is that I have a healthy baby and just get on with it. It helps I have dd here, she is six and a great distraction.

I am sure you will be fine, but make sure you have some support around. And take lts of pictures! Good luck.

That may end up happening to me. Unless baby is born during the week. He is working every single weekend due to type of job he does. He is self employed as well and needs to do these jobs. I am getting my MIL(who I get on with really well) to come up and stay in case I do go into labour. I would of course prefer DH but sometimes these things happen.
Just think about who else you would like there if he can't be there. :)

Thanks for the replies, it's good to hear from others in a similar situation. He may make it over in time depending on when he finishes the work he's doing overseas, or I may end up going over to where he is so we can be together. I have a friend in mind who has just found out she's expecting so she seems like an obvious choice. I'm waiting for my VISA to go through before I join DH and staying with my parents so I feel like I'd have lots of help if I needed it.

If it helps my dh was with me during birth but I didn't particularly notice he was there and wouldn't have missed him. I was so focused on having the baby and dealing with that that he could have gone and come back later and I wouldn't have known. Really the only one is was bothered about during the birth was the midwife- she told me what to do. I didn't even hold dh's hand as I was using hands to grip onto the bed!