Prenatal depression

[TeacupTempest]

I am concerned my very good friend may be suffering from prenatal depression.

We rarely see each other due to distance and lifestyle but I care a great deal about her and am glad she confided in me a little.

She has been to her GP but they can't refer her anywhere with less than a 3week waiting list.

Can anyone advise?

She is a very private person so I don't want to be too full on about it but I know the sooner she gets help the better.

I'm not sure I have much advice, other than it's better to get on a three week waiting list than not get on it. I was so appalled at myself for feeling depressed when I got pregnant that I didn't admit it to anyone. I'd never heard of prenatal depression at the time - I think if I had, it might have helped to know that I wasn't the first and it did have a name. As it is, it is linked to a higher incidence of post-natal depression, so it's definitely worth looking for help sooner rather than later. That said, my pre-natal depression lifted at 13 weeks, along with the sickness etc. But I did get post-natal depression too, and was again too ashamed to ask for help. It would have been better to be in the system already. She's a lucky lady to have you looking out for her!

Thanks dsmama

Yes, as you say, at least she is in the system (although I am unsure if the waiting time put her off to the point of declining it. She was talking of looking at other options when we briefly talked (people about))

She hasn't got long to go now and I just feel terribly sad for her that she has a cloud over what can be such a special time.

Insist with her to get on the list and make it very clear she can talk to you. It's difficult to talk about these things to friends because you feel you should be happy, and not complaining about feeling sad and depressed. But it's normal. (if you can find a way to explain that to her, she may feel more comfortable. I would, at least)

I suffered from this during my pregnancy, it's a horrible experience. All I can say is offer her any support you can, 3 weeks is only a short wait (I had to wait two months for my appointment) but it only took 2 sessions of CBT for me to begin feeling a bit better.

After I gave birth, the first week or 2 is a bit of a blur (as I'm sure it is for most new mums) however I'm happy to say once my pregnancy hormones settled down it didn't develop into PND, so it's possible to just literally come out the other side perfectly fine. This was despite spending a good proportion of my pregnancy unable to even get out of bed, never mind get out of the house! I was monitored much more closely by my Dr for signs of PND than people usually are if they haven't suffered during pregnancy, so am confident it would have been picked up if I was feeling the depression coming back.

If she feels up to it, could she try going to a bumps and babies group? The NCT have one in most towns so do netmums and when I went to one (accompanied by my mum because I was too scared to go alone) it was good to see other new mums coping well, I've made some lasting friendships from this.

Thanks for replying. I am seeing her again soon so will hopefully be able to have a better chat about things and will mention bumps and babies groups.