First scan at King's College Hospital

[TimeForCake]

My GP has referred me for a nuchal scan at King's Hospital, though the rest of my ante natal care will more local.
For various reasons (not pregnancy related) King's holds awful memories for me & already I am in a complete panic about going back, & feeling extremely anxious. With my first baby, I was an emotional wreck from the moment I got in the car to drive to King's. Does everyone in SE London go to King's for their first scan? What happens if I say no? Will I get offered a scan locally?

Any advice welcomed.

Of course you can ask to be referred to another hospital!

ALthough, as I understqand, KCH is something of a gold standard in the nhs when it comes to nuchal scan and so purely from a clinical point I'd love to be going there - any chance you can work on your feelings re: the anxiety around KCH? How many weeks are you now?

Thanks Manda. 9 weeks along and instead of feeling excited and joyful as with dc1, all I seem to feel is panic and anxiety. At least the first time round, a bit of ignorance was bliss!
I know KCH is a bright light in early pregnancy research, which is why I agreed to the referral again. It's only when it came through today and I burst into tears that I realised how difficult it's going to be. I know this is very self indulgent and I should be thinking about the baby and the best care available but I can't seem to get past the anxiety bit. And that's before I start worrying everything is ok in there.

Go somewhere else - it's not worth the stress! I have terrible anxiety about various things, particularly seeing doctors etc, so I totally understand.

By the way, if going through the palaver of explaining and trying to change it will just cause more stress, you could always self refer and go somewhere private for the scan. Of course it depends whether you mind paying though - I think it's a few hundred quid. I did a self referral at the Portland Hospital in central London (although I am fortunate that my private health insurance covered mine).

Good luck with whatever you decide!

Honestly, I would say that King's is pretty exceptional- I doubt you can get better quality care or scans. I would urge you to stick with Kings if you can.

But you kind of know this already - I'm sure that people can suggest ways of mitigating your anxiety (hard when we don't know the exact context but please don't share anything you're not comfortable with).
Have you thought about hypnotherapy or CBT? It sounds like your experience was traumatic and these may be ways of resolving the memories you have.
Can you have family members around you on the day?
Will the nuchal scan be done in an area which will bring back memories, or is it in a different part of the hospital?

But bear in my that your health is also important. If you really think you can't face it, don't beat yourself up. Just switch. Ultimately, you will be in good hands in most places so don't put yourself through anything horrific.

Thanks SweetPea, I hadn't thought of the possibility of a private scan.

Yes Cosmo, I know I should try and stick with King's and ultimately I probably will. I have a v supportive Dh who will be there too. The scan will be in a different building but even the journey brings back the frantic race to the hospital I had, only to get there too late. My Mum died there very suddenly and unexpectedly 3 1/2 yrs ago and I can't associate the hospital with anything else. With my first dc the scan etc was fine and I thought that I might be able to associate that happiness with King's second time round. It sounds so ridiculous when I know people have worse pregnancy related things to deal with. If I'm honest, I think my anxiety is a combination of being a bit tired & hormonal, wanting to avoid King's and ultimately wishing I could share my pregnancy news with my mum. DH are going to talk it through this evening.
Thanks for your support today.

You must have had such a terrible shock, I really can't imagine how awful it must have been for you.
And it ISNT ridiculous. Pregnancy is one of those times youre inevitably going to miss your Mum the most - it's awful that the hospital will bring back the worst of all the memories of your mum. Naturally you're finding it tough.
Take care - Good luck with your decision and your experience.

You can ask you GP to have your scan at any other local hospital but as I understand it kings is the only one that will perform a nuchal scan, I am under Bromley and we are sent to Kings for Nuchal as are all the other surrounding areas. We are really lucky in this area to get this as most of the rest of the country don't routinely have a nuchal scan.

Oh love, that must have been awful for you :( It's really hard to let go of the associations we make with things/places.

Is it the Denmark Hill location? If so, I went there 4 weeks ago and they just couldn't have been lovelier. The receptionists are really smiley and helpful, and the three doctors - two and a student - would just so kind and excited for me and DH. They must see hundreds of people a week, yet they seemed genuinely happy for everybody. I'm in Beckenham and have an ante-natal clinic down the road, so was a bit mystified why I was going there...but I realise now it's incredible luck because of what they offer.

Retro we are really lucky...I hadn't realised how amazing the Prince Royal hospital was until my friend in Woolwich insisted her husband drive her to Oprington there, than go to her local hospital! And the community midwives are really pro-homebirth and did a study a few years back.

Sorry, hijack...OP, please really don't worry, I couldn't have had a better experience. The internal was really gentle, the scan was hilarious and it wasn't just an in/out experience.

Ask them to refer you somewhere else. St Thomas is close and also excellent.

I'm in Beckenham as well Betty, This is my 3rd. I had DD at PRUH and DS at Cheltenham general and this one will be at the PRUH. They are good but like everywhere it is so dependent on who you get! The nightshirt team are renowned with all my friends for being terrible. The home right team are brilliant though, I had a MW called Liz who was brilliant and was normally a HB MW but was back for her routine stint and I had a terribl time but she made it much mor bearable.

I have been warned though that now 20 week scans are done at the beacon the 20 week scan is literally 5 minutes and very rushed. Enjoy, when SE you due?

If you don't want to go to King's just ask to be referred to St Thomas instead, it's no big deal. I have my scans at King's, it's good but I'm sure I would be equally happy at St Thomas.

Thanks all.
Betty - yes it's Denmark Hill. Thanks for saying what your experience was like, it helps. Glad you mentioned the internal was ok because when I read through the leaflet again, I noticed that- another thing to look forward to! It must be a newish thing because I didn't have that last time. Really hoping for an in and out appointment like yours!
RetroMum - agree with what you say about PRUH. Had my first there, not an easy labour but most of the mwives were lovely. But you do hear positive and negatives stories, as with anywhere I guess. It was very busy when I was there and the staff did seem stretched.
If anyone has tried hypnobirthing and has any recommendations about books/ courses, I'd be interested to know.

I don't think you have to go to Kings for your scan, what other hospitals are in the same trust? I live in Bromley and expected to have to go to Kings for one of my scans but I haven't. I had 12 week nuchal scan at Queen Mary's in Sidcup and it was all fine and not an internal!
I also had early pregnancy scan at a tiny hospital in Orpington (can't remember it's name), then all subsequent scans at PRUH.
It might be worth looking into an alternative if you really don't feel up to going to Kings.