What is wrong with me?

[Sazzel]

I've just found out I'm pregnant, very much wanted, been deliberately trying for about 18 months, had a miscarriage in November and then started trying again. I did a test on Saturday and it was positive. After about five minutes of being happy I've proceeded to spend the rest of the weekend freaking out, crying and worrying.

It doesn't help that I am currently looking for work. I quit my horrible job in January. After I got my positive test I worked out the dates and at the moment I won't qualify for maternity allowance. OH says we'll cope if I don't find work but I'm so worked up.

This should be such a happy time. Any advice?

You are pregnant. You are allowed to feel however you feel. It's all the hormones. No really blame everything on them!

You are bound to be anxious about the future having lost a pg and worrying about the job. Can you talk through what worries you with your OH? Give yourself a while for it to sink in and good luck!

oh OP!

don't be hard on yourself.

being afraid/worried means you are coming to terms with the enormity of what pregnancy means. it is not unhealthy to be quite afraid and to freak out for a bit! you are being realistic! you are bringing another human being into the world, of course you're worried.

let the emotions happen and don't be afraid of them, they can't hurt you and they are entirely temporary.

you will be OK. the money stuff will sort itself, and this whole situation is temporary. you are not going to be unemployed and pg forever!

cup of tea,
youtube for some pregnancy affirmations/relaxation tracks,
put your feet up for a bit,
ask OH to rub your back.
maybe have a long bath and a good cry if you need it.

nothing wrong with being sad and scared, this is a massive thing that you're doing and those emotions are just as valid as being giddy with excitement.

this too will pass, the joy will come soon :)

Thank you for the reassurance, it's helped. It's so different this time, last time I was so excited, now I feel like I know too much.

There's nothing wrong with you.

I felt the same when I concieved, and we had been trying for almost 6 years. I think for me, it was the transition from 'wanting a family someday in the future' to 'Oh my goodness, we are going to have a baby in 8 months.' I suddenly realised that my situation wasn't ideal in terms of work/home/money/my fitness and I really wanted the best for this baby, and only had a short time to fix everything.

Of course, I can't fix everything, the life I have to share with my baby isn't perfect, its a work in progress, but that's true for everyone.

You'll do your best and your baby will love you even though your work situation isn't perfect.

Congratulations, try not to let your hormones be too hard on you!

I had a miscarriage jan 1st and I'm now 11 weeks pregnant and felt like u, I had a scan at 7 weeks and saw heartbeat but don't stop the worrying got next scan 11th may at 12/4 weeks hoping everything will still be fine, it's natural to worry but try think positive and not get to stressed x