baby shower

[Lizzy1975]

i've always thought they were a bit...twee and not my thing at all, but my mum and aunts and a couple of friends have asked me if i want one and at 33 weeks i'm coming around to the idea of getting everyone together to celebrate the baby, especially as i've been so knackered and a bit of a hermit recently it would be a good way of seeing everyone. but the idea of games fills me with dread, as does the thought of people feeling obliged to buy presents. what are your plans? i didn't have a hen do either, i just find that kind of enforced celebration awful. i am a miserable cow, aren't i?

Not a "miserable cow" at all. I really don't like the idea of these - it's basically an invitation to people to come and spend money on you and you don't even have the baby there yet. Tempting fate and mercenary, if you ask me. I'm with you on feeling uncomfortable about it - don't feel pressured if you don't want to do it.

It sounds as if you just want to have a party, not a shower (which is short for "shower with gifts" ie the obligatory gift-giving which you dread).

I there any reason why you can't just have the (non-shower) party you want?

I'm in exactly the same position! Although someone on here posted that they went to a book theme shower where instead of gifts were people feel obliged to spend lots they bring or buy their favourite childhood book - which means really everyone would be spending under £5 & your baby gets a full library I love the idea and am thinking of stealing it!
If I have one I'm scrapping the baby games unless I find fun ones on the net are not super cheesy, also inviting men so my DP can be involved - it will basically be a chance for me to catch up with everyone - may go for dinner somewhere or have it at home and order loads of pizza or curry or something.

Ditto :-) Have a preggie friend so we are each throwing one for each other. Mine is a afternoon champagne and tea party at home for just about 10 girls and hers she is treating about 20 girls to champagne tea out. Neither us really like the idea of people feeling pressured to buy gifts but so many people ask what you want need. We each did a little gift list on line and said please don't feel you have to but it's there if they ask/insist!!

Baby showers where you have to spend a fortune on a gift or play twee party games run the risk of going down the hen party where you have to have strippers route imho! I went to a baby shower where all the girls sat around to watch the new mum open every pressie and oooh and ahhh over it all, it was embarrassing for the people who'd bought gifts and embarrassing for her too I would have thought. I'd find this horribly cringey. Totally hear you on wanting to avoid 'enforced celebration', Lizzy!

The book idea is fantastic. It's lovely to get a few people together even if it is just mums, sisters and a few best friends! And if you feel awkward, maybe find a way to treat them to tea / fizz so that you don't feel like you are 'on the take' (which is what I was worried about)

I'm with you on the cringey shower front (didn't even know you were supposed to do games :s), but I think a tea party or the childhood book one sound like good half-way alternatives, or if you don't think it will stop people wanting to spend more you could always ask them to donate to a charity of your choice (maybe local baby scbu or something?). Good luck!

Yeah, I don't like them. Compounded with the fact that you can't actually drink at your own baby shower.

I plan to have a baby shower after my baby is born. No presents, just all our friends coming round to meet the baby and having some nice food and drink.

One of my friends organized a surprise one for me : lots of food, cake and champagne at her house with lots of male and female friends. No games. No twee. Between them all they bought me a pregnancy massage and vouchers for nice nursing underwear, spending about a fiver each.

It was lovely.

Oh but I love the book idea!!

they [the guests] bring or buy their favourite childhood book.

That is a lovely idea.

A 'shower' really is to celebrate with the mother to be - you can do as much or little as you'd like. If you don't want the twee and games just say - people tend to do what the preggie lady wants. The ladies above have given lots of good ideas but the most important thing is you see the people you love/love you and enjoy some time with them before you take on the responsibility of motherhood.

The other thing is - people tend to be generous when you have a baby so if there is something you specifically want you could ask for vouchers towards that rather than ending up with lots your not particularly keen on.

Whatever happens - I hope you enjoy the day.

My plan with baby 1 was to go for brunch with about 15 friends and relatives at a nice hotel in London. I specifically said no gifts - plan was for everyone to pay for their own brunch but I was going to cover champagne/cocktails for everyone.

As it happened, it was planned for 35 weeks and I had to cancel it because I was in hospital having ds!! But despite me saying no gifts, the day after I arrived home from the hospital with ds I received a huge parcel full of presents! Made me cry!

I don't feel like trying for a baby shower this time around but I am insisting on a special tea with cupcakes and a present - the only attendees will be dh and ds!

This is a zombie thread - appears to have been resurrected by @samanthaquino to plug something.

Oh god lord. Thanks for pointing out harrietm87 - looks like the worst product ever! :-)

I was dreading mine at first but it was so lovely spending quality time with close family and friends. We had a lovely evening. It’s an excuse to have a get together and a laugh. 😋

I'm having a 'bring a book' baby shower, planned by my best friends in December. I loved that it meant cheap cheerful but meaningful presents all for baby (and not for me). I've asked each guest to sign a note to baby and date it on the inside of the cover as a keepsake.

Oops just seen it's a zombie thread.. Sorry.