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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Perineal massage... are you doing it

37 replies

katiegolightly · 11/03/2012 07:43

The time to start this is approaching. uh. must I? I can barely reach it. It's not that romantic to ask DP to join in! Did you? Did it make any difference at all?

OP posts:

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Seona1973 · 11/03/2012 07:51

never did it with either of mine

Debeez · 11/03/2012 09:13

I didn't do it and I didn't tear. Nice controlled crown due to epidural though. Are there any studies or evidence based research done with control groups on this?

I often thought maybe it was a comfort thing, you've have a more controlled crown as you were less worried about tearing as mother feels she has prepared more for this moment. Obviously birth can sometimes feel a little out of control for the mother in some ways and this would offer physiological reassurance.

Marked my place as would like to come back to this :)

justhayley · 11/03/2012 09:14

Hello again,
Iv been thinking about this this morning as well. Just been reading stuff on the net and working out how to do it - am yet to try. I would like to do all I can to avoid tearing or being cut even though I'm not keen on the massage, & even after reading how its done am not 100% ill even no what I'm doing! don't want to be stretching bits that's shouldn't be being stretched!!
Like we don't have enough to think about without working out how to massage our insides with our thumbs!
My theory Is if they shared all this info with teenage girls, the teenage pregnancy rate would drastically drop!!

Clockingout · 11/03/2012 09:23

I did it for weeks with my first - got a 4th deg tear, but then no amount of perineal massage is going to stop them needing to do an episiotomy! Its like stretch mark cream, if youre going to get them no amount of massage or cream is going to help.

Debeez · 11/03/2012 09:24

Interesting point, bad comparison but I've stretched my ears before to accommodate plug style body jewelry. Short term stretch, everything goes back. Long term stretch, things stay stretched.

scarletforya · 11/03/2012 12:58

No way. I'd rather tear/get repaired or have an episiotomy.

I don't like the idea of permanently stretching something thats not supposed to be stretched. I don't understand it, it seems like body vandalism to me.

Plus I'm squeamish, I don't like rummaging around down there.

Minty82 · 11/03/2012 13:06

Glad you asked this - I've been feeling vaguely guilty for not doing it despite having it carefully explained in antenatal classes...just never seems the right time of day to go and stretch my insides! Plus, apparently it's meant to hurt, but I wouldn't be confident enough not to assume I must be damaging myself if it did.

Chunkychicken · 11/03/2012 13:55

I tried it with DH's assistance when pg with my DD but I don't think we did it 'religiously' or properly, & then still had stitches for a 2nd internal tear...

Saw a gyn consultant after having pain during sex & he said I should have had an episiotomy to prevent that type of tearing. He was quite adamant that MW neglect/refuse to do the cuts nowadays, when they should, & women end up seeing him to 'deal with the problem later on'.

Shan't bother with the massage this time around!!! Would almost prefer the cut...

Chunkychicken · 11/03/2012 13:56

should say 2nd degree^

GinPalace · 11/03/2012 14:24

Nope, I looked at instructions, turned them upside down, had another look, squinted.
Tried it in the bath, decided you needed orangutan arms to reach to that position with bump in the way, flatly refused to ask Dh to do it.
Screwed up leaflet and flung in bin, might have mentioned the word 'tossers' as I did so.
No tears, all good.
Think tearing is down to how controlled it is as Debeez said. I think that you would have to be doing lots of this massage for it to make any difference and 'f that for a game of soldiers' was my approach.
Never did me any harm.

stripeyZ · 11/03/2012 16:59

I've been doing it (37 weeks). It's my least favourite thing to do. Got DH to give a go initially but it felt too weird & unnatural so I'm doing it now.

It's v odd, I can just about reach & I've been surprised how much room there is in there! I can feel the rim of the muscle & am concentrating on massaging that. I notice it's quite tender for a day or two & then recovers. If nothing else it's helped me prepare for the sensation. It's not pleasant & first time we did it I cried!

Badgerina · 11/03/2012 17:40

No. I honestly find it all a bit ridiculous. I'm not one for being squeamish about rummaging around my nether parts , but this just seems weird. What about shoving stuff up your fallulah of gradually increasing size in order to widen your lady tunnel!?!? Start with a cherry tomato, increasing to a small pumpkin? Also, the idea of getting ones partner to do it is HILARIOUS.

I had a small 2nd degree tear with DS and that was due mainly to his shoulder getting a teensy bit stuck and the midwife needing to unhook him a bit. It was no big deal and didn't require stitching. I think pelvic floor exercises are far more beneficial - they increase your muscle awareness so that pushing can be more controlled, which means your perineum stretches gradually.

RickGhastley · 11/03/2012 17:49

I did it for DS1 - 2nd degree tear requiring many stitches

Never bothered for DS2 - small graze and no stitches.

Wish I'd never bothered!

WhenDoISleep · 11/03/2012 17:50

Yes, did with DS1 and due to start doing it for DS2 this week. I get DH to do it - not the most romantic experience ever but there is no way that I am flexible enough to do it properly.

Whether or not is actually helps, I don't know. With DS1 I was classed as having a minor graze - literally was a tiny graze of about 1cm. Maybe the result would have been the same without the massage, but that can never be known. It did help me be somewhat mentally prepared (as someone unthread alluded to) and meant that I knew what it felt like to be stretched that much.

rednellie · 11/03/2012 18:20

I don't think there is any evidence to support it. I've not done it and had zero tears last time round. Understanding crowning and breathing techniques are much much more important. Although sometimes you will just tear, like someone said above about stretch marks.

confuzed90 · 11/03/2012 18:30

I dont even know what it is! Never did it with DS, ended up with no tears, rips or anything and he was 7Ib 14, with a big head! Lol. I believe that pushing when and only when your meant to and told to worked. No matter how hard it is to hold back. Even the midwife said she couldn't believe how well I did it, she said It was like I was experienced, but I just listened and pushed when told to. And slowly. Took my time. I plan the same with this one.

Chunkychicken · 11/03/2012 19:17

I have to say that, whilst controlling crowning will help with perennial tears, it might not prevent internal ones such as mine, and despite how calm, controlled & relaxed you are, baby just comes quickly!!! I only pushed when told & was so knackered just before she crowned that I couldn't have done anything but pause, and yet I tore... I think, as clockingout said, what will be, will be.

If it helps you to relax, do it, but personally, it did just the opposite for me in the run up to baby's arrival!!!

Indith · 11/03/2012 19:23

Never done it. Dc1 I had a slight internal graze, no stitches. Dc2 who was rather a lot bigger than dc1 I had a slight tear to towards the rear. No stitches but have felt distinctly less stretchy in the perineum area since then. Dc3 a slight internal graze again, no stitches. At his birth though I could feel myself start to stretch round the head but knew I wasn't ready to push so I panted out that contraction and felt ready to push on the next one so it was controlled. What made a massive difference I think was that as I pushed I asked the MW to apply [ressure to the perineum, it was a totally instinctive spur of the moment request but it helped so much, I didn't get the ring of fire feeling and was honestly surprised when they said the head was out as I didn't feel like I had stretched enough!

LilPud · 11/03/2012 19:27

I was all for doing it (every little helps and all that) until I watched an instructional video on YouTube . Goodness knows how you're supposed to reach an area I've barely seen in months and no way is DH getting involved. As others have said what will be will be and ultimately we will get over it!

Original poster

katiegolightly · 11/03/2012 20:40

That's a good point, Badgerina - perhaps better investing energies in the pelvic floor. Thanks everyone, might give it a go here but not stress if it's too hideous to bother doing every day.

OP posts:

KatieDingus · 11/03/2012 22:51

was starting to worry about not doing this yet but after reading this I don't think I'll bother, it sounds horrific anyway!

muslimah28 · 11/03/2012 23:23

There IS evidence to show that perineal massage antenatally can help reduce chances of a tear or epi. Of course a thread such as this will bring out people who say I never did it and I never tore or I ended up with an epi anyway. That's because the evidence doesn't say it's 100% effective, just that it reduces the likelihood. So if you don't want to do it then yes there is chance you'll be fine and if you do do it then yes there's a chance that you'll tear or have an epi anyway. But the fact remains that the risks of tearing and an epi are significantly reduced with perineal massage. Also the risk decreases more for women who are older than 30 at the time of having their first baby.

rednellie · 12/03/2012 02:24

I was told recently by a HCP that they are rethinking this as there was a study showing little or no benefit, obviously anecdotal evidence isn't helpful, but this is mn not a medical journal.

I'm totally happy to be corrected if someone can point me in the direction of the research - although it's probably a bit late now and seeing as I'm 37 weeks with twins I'm not entirely sure I could even reach around the bump!

GirlWithTheMouseyHair · 12/03/2012 03:01

Didn't bother, 2x homebirths no tearing, BUT I did rub argan oil on my tummy every day and swear that's why I don't have stretch marks, go figure

PinkFondantFancy · 12/03/2012 03:17

I think there is evidence to say it helps. I did it, it's not so bad - not sure why everyone's saying it's horrific?? Compared to having to insert progesterone suppositories twice a day for 16 weeks it was a walk in the park. Anyway why wouldn't you try it? Nothing to lose, surely? FWIW I had a tiny second degree tear that didn't need stitches. Who knows whether the massage helped or not. There's only any point in doing it fir your first birth though.

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