Pregnant again after 3mc's...5+1...and terrified....

[caija]

Hi all, need some advice, well, I have an 11 year old dd who is healthy and had a healthy pregnancy with her, then met another partner, was with him seven years, in that time, we had 1 mc, then closely followed by a mmc, then I had my ds, almost 5 although he has bn born with a genetic/ chromosomal disorder, myself and partner at the time were tested, n our chromosome's came back normal, saw a geneticist who even said it was just an unfortunate thing n thought even with my ds's dad, if we'd had another baby it'd have less than 1% chance that this would happen again, I had another mmc when my ds was 9 months. Never got my mc's looked into, as at the time my Son was being investigated for everything and I thought it'd shed some light on
My mc's... But it didn't. However, now I am with another Partner and am 5+1 n terrified of mc, also scared that if I get past mc, should I have tests to see If the baby has any disorder like my ds?? As I know the amnio carries a risk of mc also :( soo scared and
I am stressing myself out so much that I am terrified I bring on a mc..... Can anyone please gimme some advice? Ty so much xxx

I had two missed miscarriages, and was like you terrified of miscarrying again. I was lucky that i didnt. I did not sleep the night before my 12 week scan, had a poorly belly in the morning due to stress, couldnt eat anything before going to the scan, felt sick with worry etc, and you know what, got there to see everything was okay. He is now 20 months and a joy. He fell over and grazed his head today walking, well actually trying to run and got over excited and fell before i could catch him. Its hard when you miscarry, but sometimes its just the way it goes. I like to believe the two i lost are still with my, and i believe they were a girl, and a boy respectively.
Its so hard i know, especially once you have had a mmc, and no signs of miscarriage you sort of prepare yourself for going there to find the baby has no heartbeat. But honestly the chances are low of you miscarrying again.

I hope everything is okay. x

Aww ty mylittlemiracle. That's reassuring. Am driving me and my partner up the wall with ths, constantly looking for signs of blood at the toilet etc ....can't wait til ths horrid first few weeks is over xx

N congrats on yr healthy ds after 2mc's Mylittlemiracle xx

Bump

Thank you. I do hope everything is okay for you this time. Its hard the first 12 weeks until you see them, and a "viability scan" isnt always helpful, i had one with the second and still went on to miscarry.

Hope you are okay and everything goes well for you.

Sorry to hear you are so anxious. I know how you feel about the miscarriages being on about my 9th pregnancy currently (I have honestly lost track) - with one DD to show for it. I have had lots of investigations and basically I am not really any the wiser - sometimes the medical community can't offer much in the way of answers. I do know that some of my miscarriages were embyos that had chromosonal abnormalities though so although I did not carry one of these to term I know I have a higher chance than most of having this same dilema. My advice would be to do as i am intending to (easier said than done) and to take one step at a time. If you think a viability scan would help then push for one - you then know at least what the next decisions are you may be faced with (I will be having one as I aslo have a higher risk of Ectopic). If I make it to 12 weeks then I will see what the results are like from that and take advice on the next step. I know I would struggle with an amnio as the thought of doing anything to bring on a miscarriage seems alien to me after having so many. I know it is easier said than done but just take one day at a time and remember signs can be misleading. My last loss there was no bleeding at all, with my DD I had spotting for months. Analysing everything is natural but the one thing I have learnt so far from my experience is that it doesn't always give us the answers. Hugs and babydust to you x

Ty Mylittlemiracle I know what you mean about the viability scan...I had one with my 3rd mc (2nd mmc) and saw a heartbeat then a week later at next scan, no heartbeat, the gynae that did my 2nd d+c told me there is no
Point Gettn a scan early, unless 8 weeks or above, because then there is much more chance of Gettn a viable result....a dunno though. Got first midwife app on 1st march. MIdgetgems am
So sorry to hear of your mc's :( I feel like I have lost count with 3, a kinda block
It out :( had two mc's when my dd was around 2 or 3 so that would be 2003 or 2004, I had a normal mc, at 5 weeks then four months later a mmc when I went for 12 week scan, baby had died at week 8 :( n then I had my ds in march 2007, born with chromosomal abnormalities n lots of problems :( he is five in a couple of weeks, n then I
Had another mmc when ds was 9 months. Saw a heartbeat at six weeks, next again week, no heartbeat. It's soo bloody hard. xx

Sorry Midgetm I mean lol xx

I prefer Midgetgems x

I always prefer getting a scan although now I don't have much choice because of the Ectopic I will have one even earlier at 5 weeks (another sure fire route to madness), although I know they can be a route to trouble. The only time I regretted it was when we did see a strong heartbeat but then went on to mc but normally they just tell me the gloomy news (ie there is a hb but it isn't as strong as it should be). However - I would rather hear it early and not surrounded by other 12week smiley happy women but everyone is different.

I was told if the heartbeat is strong at 6 weeks then there is a high percentage chance (I think in the 80% range). My EPU is excellent and say if that is what the patient wants to stop them driving themselves crazy then they are happy to do them. As much as we try to stop obbsessing though we still will..... Good luck with it all. Keep us posted on how you get on.

My little one had a strong heartbeat at six weeks and 6 days, two weeks later, his (still believe it was a boy, but will never be told), heart stopped beating. I found out three days after as i had a scan at an epu.

I think the word viable is a horrid word and i hate it. It seems so impersonal, and cold, but thats just me i suppose, all these medical words seem hard and cold.

I really do hope all goes well for you.

Goes to show % means f all if you are one of the 20 not the 80 as we both have been! I really hope it all goes well for you too. Let's cross everything for each other! X

I am crossing everything for us!! Soo scary, had spotting last night after sex with my DF, only four or five dots, n today I went to the toilet n as I was wiping, I kinda scratched myself with the toilet roll cos I was itchy lol, sorry, I know! TMI! But I had a few tiny spots of blood, think I itched too hard tbh....dunno
What to do.....

I have it too. Pretty much every time I wipe. No pain though and no red blood. Actually taking it better than normally. I am taking my own advice and trying to focus on the fact that the outcome could still be a positive one. Not sure how I am managing it as my odds are well stacked against that. It's the only way to stay sane x

I hope it turns out okay for both of you. I wish there was something i could say or do to make it all be okay for you, i really do, but i cant, but be here to listen and to send ((((hugs)))), cos you both need the reassurance and strength sent to you.

Thanks MylittleMiracle. x