4 weeks pregnant...way more stunned than I thought I'd be!

[cuppaneeded]

My DH and I actively tried for our second baby this past month and I've just found out I'm pregnant. I am delighted in many ways but I'm physically shaking! I'm just surprised (which I know seems mad considering we were trying). Th gap between dd and this one will be 21 months and I think this is triggering my reaction. I feel sad that my little period of adoration for dd is going to be diluted. Maybe I just feel that I can't love anyone as much as her and therefore feel sad/worried about the unknown. Can anyone understand how I feel? any words of wisdom... My hands are still jittery!

Hi,

I feel the same really sad for DS as he is getting a sibling he didnt ask for and will no longer be the only one and my attention will be diluted. However I know he will love the baby when it gets here and is enjoying my bump, I also know it will pay off when he is an adult and has a friend at all times.

Congratulations on your pregnancy! My number one will be 3 and a half by the time this one appears, and I still feel exactly the same as you and heartmoonshadow. As we give her our rapt attention as she embarks on yet another long and convoluted tale or involves us in a game of her own devising with the most complicated etiquette imaginable, I think, "Oh, bless you! You're in for such a shock!" However, I always knew that I wanted her to have a sibling, and I hope that at some point she'll be pleased she has! I also worry about how I could EVER love anyone even nearly as much as I love her, but my mum (I am number 3) and every other mother I have ever met has assured me that I can, and I will!
I think (I hope!) your feelings are very common and very normal - enjoy your pregnancy, and congratulations again

Thank you both... Comforting to know these feelings are normal!

My DD and DS are 21 months apart and I too was worried but you'll have NO dilution of love or feel like you're splitting yourself between them!
Congratulations but please dont worry, you just get even more love for them rather than sharing out what love you have for the first one xx

Congratulations cuppaneeded!

I hear you on the feeling stunned and worried about first-born-love being diluted. I've just found out I'm expecting number 2 (unplanned in our case, mine's the 'bollocks bollocks bollocks' thread ) and I feel so sorry for poor 15 month old DS. He's been grumpy and clingy today, as if he knows already.

Daft really, as I'm one of three and have always felt completely loved by my parents.