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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

First time mum - advice please!!

18 replies

SAF1610 · 14/02/2012 08:35

Hi, I am expecting my first child in May. Just planning what I need to buy and it all adds up!! Hubby a bit shocked!! Just wondering if any experienced mums out there can give me advice? I have bought a baby bjorn babybalance seat as though expensive the reviews are great. Do I need a baby gym as well? What age do babies use those? Do I need a nursing chair? I see some people use the Ikea Poang which is much cheaper and can be used elsewhere in the house later on. We are considering the iCandy Peach Blossom in case we have another bambino in a few years. Don't want to waste money having to buy a new double buggy.
What was your best and most useful buy?? What do I definitely not need??

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Chelly71 · 14/02/2012 08:57

Hi, Congratulations! I'm having DC2 in April and remember this stage v well... you'll get lots of replies but really, don't go mad and buy everything straight off. Look for good quality second hand stuff (try your local NCT nearly new sales or local ebay sellers). I borrowed loads of stuff off a friend and now I'm working out what I need again as she has just had another so I've given it all back! Things don't get used much for little ones so they are often in good nick even if used. Pram/buggy, car seat, cot, bouncy chair, moses basket (if used) are important as they get used the most but honestly you can get so caught up and waste so much money on stuff you rarely use. A good comfy upright chair is very useful for feeding (I have a rocking chair off my SIL). I wouldn't go for a double buggy now either, you just never know what you'll need and for a good few months/years a single will be more practical. Anyway, just my opinions really but I hope it helps... save some of those pennies for coffee and chocolate cake with other new mums to discuss the delights of your newborn (and we all know that chocolate cake makes for very good quality milk) Wink

Good luck!

Flisspaps · 14/02/2012 09:01

You don't need any of those things.

All you need are clothes, somewhere for baby to sleep, something to transport baby in, nappies and wipes/cotton wool and something to feed baby with (either breast or bottle)

Everything else is just 'nice' or a waste of money. I'd not bother with a buggy for two until you need it.

A chair for feeding is unnecessary (I have a rocking chair i used about twice, just sit in bed or on the sofa!) and a baby gym or playmat isn't essential, especially with a newborn! Wait to see what you get bought or given, if you want one when baby is a couple of months old then get one.

lynlynnicebutdim · 14/02/2012 09:06

we had a baby gym which was a good buy. It was a fisher price rainforest theme square mat with two cross bars which arced across the top from which toys could hung. It also had some flashing lights and played music. I think it was about £60 new (it was a present from work) and DD loved it from about 2 months onwards. Her and the dog would lie under the toys and she would have a good kick around, look at the animals and lights etc. She never complained when she was under it.

We also got a bouncy chair, again fisher price. It vibrated but we never used that feature. We used it pretty much all the time from the day we brought her home. It also had a cross bar on it from which toys hung which she could pull and make them play music. She would randomly hit the toys occasionally until she was about 4 months i think and had enough motor control to actually grasp them. It was a very handy place to put her when i needed her to be occupied and safe, like when i was having a shower etc.

Both the baby gym and the bouncy chair can be picked up quite cheaply on Ebay now, even BNWT.

I do wish we had invested in one of those big padded play mats as it would have been handy to take into the garden on nice days. I will be getting on for DD2 (who is also due in May).

We also got a nursing chair quite cheaply from kiddicare (great retailer by the way, cheap and fantastic service). To be honest while we use the chair loads for DD1 i do wish we hadn't bothered getting a specific "nursing chair" cause it was rubbish for breastfeeding (arms were too high and was always running the risk of crashing DD1's head into them). I think the Poang chair would have been a better buy but didn't think of it at the time.

We borrowed a friends moses basket but DD was out of it by 9 weeks and sleeping in her own cot in her own room. She was a very long baby and would whack the sides and wake herself up. If you cant borrow a moses basket you can pick them up very cheaply either on Ebay or at something like an NCT nearly new sale. Alternatively if the pram you buy has a solid carricot open you could potentially use that.

As to prams/buggies/travel systems, it really is horses for courses. It entirely depends on your lifestyle, where you live and what you intend to do with the buggy. I had a brief love affair with the icandy peach but in the end fell out of love with it when i realised that DD1 would be really squished in it when the second seat was added. When she was born we bought a Phil and Teds Sport with a view to adding a second seat when and if No2 came along. No2 is now brewing and i am trading the sport in on a Baby Jogger City Select as it will meet my needs better. You would probably benefit from having a look through the pushchair section on here to get a feel for your options.

God, i have written an essay. Apologies. I have a bad case of "i want to be on maternity leave already" and am trying to avoid actually doing any real work Smile

Hope it helps anyway.

Flisspaps · 14/02/2012 09:12

See, we were given a bouncy chair for DD which she hated so were glad we didn't buy one, and a £15 baby gym from ASDA which she absolutely loved when she was about 3 months old, not hugely padded but we had that on the grass in summer Smile

OutMeAndDie · 14/02/2012 09:17

Congratulations.
I got alot of my stuff second hand. The travel system was from an nct sale as was the nappy bin and a few other bits n bobs. I bought a stokke highchair from a friend but wish i had just got a standard one with a plastic tray as its less messy. I borrowed a playmat from a friend. Was given a bouncy chair, and borrowed a bumbo seat. You will find they whizz through developments and you stop using things quite quickly. My DS used the playmat (gym thing) til he started getting more stimulated and wanting to roll over. The bouncy chair was fab and used til he could sit up. I wouldbt bother with a bumbo as DS was only in it a few weeks in bewtween trying to sit up and sitting up, its a waste once they can as they lean over in it. hmm what else. I bought my moses basket and stand on ebay. Most children grow out of these in 3-4 months. MY DS isnt long but he outgrew it in 3 months. A crib is probably better if you want them in your room for longer. But again NCT sale / ebay. Oh back to bouncy chair. DS didnt like the vibration so maybe a swing one would be better. I got cot mobile and stuff like that on ebay. We bought the nursery furniture new but the money for it was a gift from grandparents.

Happenstance · 14/02/2012 09:43

you need somewhere for baby to sleep, someway of moving baby around and something for baby to wear,and nappies

I would, if you can, hold off on the double as the new peach will be out before long, so pop baby in sling or cheap pram for now, TBH don't buy the blossom anyway just buy the Peach then upgrade when the time comes, it won't cost any more money and you spend less to start with, plus you may find you want a bigger gap or baby refuses pushchair at 18 months, i have the peach and I'm going to see how DD is with walking, if it doesn't work out then i will upgrade,

I found DD loved her baby Gym from about 3 months, she hated her bouncy chair with a passion, loved her jumperoo, so wait to see what type of person you have before buying anything.

Congratulations BTW being a Mum is amazing even if it does turn you hair grey Grin

LovesBeingWearingSkinnyJeans · 14/02/2012 09:48

You don't need anything except nappies a few clothes and some boobs the rest is optional. You can however buy things you would like, one way to reduce tge cost is second hand, I have found eBay to be great.

Joygirl78 · 14/02/2012 10:07

Ditto on lynlyn re: iCandy peach. I remember watching a lady in john Lewis looking at one when I was browsing for DC1. She was heavily pregnant with a toddler. There was no way the toddler was going to be comfortable in it when on the double set up. I think they are better for twins or if the age difference is really small. I am expecting DC2 and have bought a second hand phil and ted which is great.
Don't buy a specially designed nursing chair. Buy a chair you like that has arm rests at the right level. A sofa and an ordinary bed pillow works well when not in the bedroom. The nursing chairs are big bulky and in attractive, not worth the money.
A playgymn is a good thing to ask for as a present from grandparents siblings. They can cost from only £20 so dom't need to be pricey. People tend to flood you with clothes when baby is born which may not be your taste, so if you helpfully steer relatives/friends to more practical presents then do that!

TimothyClaypoleLover · 14/02/2012 10:29

Sitting on the sofa to feed? Heavens above Flisspaps!! Seriously though, agree that you do not need a nursing chair. I managed perfectly well with the sofa.

It is easy to go mad with firstborn, particularly when the likes of Mothercare et al advise you that you absolutely must have this and this and that. You will be amazed at what people will buy for you so I wouldn't go too mad. We had bouncy chair and gym bought for us although DD didn't use them until 2 months so no need to rush out getting everything before they are born.

As others have said, all you need is clothes, nappies, car seat, pram and somewhere for baby to sleep.

Mikocat · 14/02/2012 10:46

Hello SAF1610, I am expecting my first baby in May too, I just wanted to say hello and feel welcome to join the 'due in May' thread on the antenatal boards!

We are trying to be sensible and avoid buying loads, although we have bought quite an expensive crib (after research suggested that we could sell it on for as much on eBay) and a cheap moses basket - oh and LOADS of clothes, i need to slow down on that front as people keep saying that we'll get given loads more.

We have been given a pram by friends, but still need to get a carseat. Similarly we have been offered a bouncy chair and a playmat by friends. A lot of people seem happy for the chance to declutter whilst giving a gift to a friend.

I have bookmarked the Poang chair, that sounds like a good idea as our sofa is far too low and slouchy.

Spoutlet · 14/02/2012 10:57

The BabyBjorn Babysitter is a great bouncer, we still use it occasionally now and DD is nearly 10 months - she's always been very happy in it. We got this baby gym www.amazon.co.uk/Baby-Einstein-Neptune-Ocean-Adventure/dp/B000TFGUC8 - was £30 from TKMaxx. We thought it was quite rubbish and have recently sent it to the charity shop despite our intention to have more DC. So, if I was you I'd spend your money on other things. You do not need a nursing chair, I'm still BFing DD comfortably on the sofa or propped up in bed - not once have I wished I'd bought a special chair Smile.

puddingnazi · 14/02/2012 11:04

www.wilkinsonplus.com/invt/0310874
I just bought one of these chairs for the nursery an absolute bargain and really comfy
ebay is a godsend my theory is buy the little things for cheap second hand you can get loads of newborn baby clothes bundles for next to nothing !! And then save your pennies for the things that do matter like your pram baby bouncer and play mat,
also get a cot bed...

KatAndKit · 14/02/2012 11:42

It seems you are going for top end brands and that is why it looks so expensive.
You don't need the 1000 pound pram.
Poang do make a rocking chair version of the standard chair, although if you are set on a nursing chair then there are loads of them going on Ebay.
I have got quite a few nice outfits and clothes on ebay, most of them barely worn.

HidingInTheUndergrowth · 14/02/2012 11:54

Keep in mind that the most unexpected people will suddenly appear wanting to buy you things (I have to confess I was rather surprised by this, though that sounds silly now!).

In the throws of first baby excitment I pretty much covered all the essentials before this happened and have now had to spend time trying to think of nice to haves for people to get as gifts. So why don't you have a list of things like bouncers and playmats tucked away but don't buy them right away, that way if a random inlaw insists that they are desperate to get something you will be able to direct them towards something you actually want.

Oh, and ebay is indeed amazing for cheap stuff. I got almost all our stuff from ebay and it is all super quality.

Mikocat · 14/02/2012 14:23

Forgot to say that I am making a wishlist on Amazon so that nearer the time I can point people to that if they ask what they can get us! You can add things from anywhere now with the 'Universal Wishlist' feature.

Unfortunately I don't think anyone will want to buy us practical things like nappies, a breast pump, sore nipple cream etc! I think they'll all want to buy 'nice' things. :)

YuleingFanjo · 14/02/2012 14:26

Asda do a very similar chair to the Ikea one, though I didn't use mine much.

OutMeAndDie · 14/02/2012 16:24

Oh my sil asked for nappies for her baby shower gift. She got loads :) Lansinoh nip cream is fab. I might buy that for a friend actually, thanks :)

rednellie · 14/02/2012 18:19

Beware things that are sold as 'for babies' which you could buy way cheaper, but named something else (it's a bit like weddings...). The poang chair is an e.g, but also baby gyms/playmats. What's wrong with a big blanket or quilt?

Also, with the pushchair - we borrowed a mates one for the first 3 months, hardly used it as we carried DD in a sling, but it gave us a chance to see what we actually wanted in a pushchair. Turned out, our list of requirements were very different from what we'd originally thought.

NCT nearly new sales are also brilliant for picking up bargains - me and DH used to go with 20 quid and see how much we could get for that. Answer: loads.

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