Pregnant with BMI over 50

[JYoung3537]

My daughter is 26 and expecting my first grandchild this August. She is very overweight - 29 stones - and the pregnancy was not planned.

She is terrified that something will happen to the baby because of her weight and this has been made worse because she can't find anything on the net to reassure her that people of her size have had a sucessful pregnancy. I have told her and her partner they should bring this up with the midwife at her first scan on Friday but wondered if anybody here has had a similar experience that I can pass on to her to give her some reassurance.

Hi. I am sorry that i can not be a great help in re assuring your dd. Hopefully someone else more in the know will come along soon.

However i would just like to mention 1 point, and i do hope you and your dd are not offended as i am truely trying to help. You mention that your daughter has her first scan on Friday, is this a 12 week one? The reason i ask is i was overweight when pregnant with dd2, and after 2 other children i went in the scan quite happily knowing what to expect. But i was alot larger this time round, and they had difficulty trying to scan me correctly. I had to hold my stomach up and roll on one side then another. At the end i was told she had done the best she could but my "stomach fat" had not given her a clear view. It was also written in the scan report (but in a technical name)

I had not thought about the fact that the scanning would be harder due to me being overweight. I wish someone had mentioned it to me. So in a nice way could you mention to your daughter that she "may" have to move around, be prepared for negative comments and not have a brilliant clear scan.

I did however have the healthiest pregnancy and easiest birth with dd2 than my other 2 dc. So it didnt cause me any problems. She will i guess be under a consultant becasue of her BMI. My advice would be to embrace that and make sure she asks any fears or queries.

Good luck to her.

Thank you for your response. Neither me nor DD are easily offended, feel free to say it how it is. That's what we need!!!

It is her 12 week scan and she's realised that there may be problems - that's something else she's worrying about. She's resigned herself to the fact that she probably won't be able to have a clear photo too.

It's interesting that you mention her being under a consultant. She had to see her GP due to a chest infection about 4 weeks ago and the GP asked if she'd been referred to a consultant. She hasn't and that's yet another thing that's niggling her. She's got it into her head that the medical staff will think she's stupid for getting pregnant at her weight and won't expect her to have a good outcome and therefore they'll not look after her they would "normal" pregant women. I know it's not true but I'm battling her hormones as well as her negativity. Both her and her partner really want this baby but she's not letting herself enjoy the pregnancy due to her state of anxiety (which she knows is bad for the baby and, here we go again!).

Sorry for rambling but it's nice to get it out in the open.

I am pretty sure there was a lady on one born every minute with quite a high bmi, last series not the current one. From what I remember she was expecting a c section but delivered vaginally and both she and baby were fine.

Maybe have a look on their website?

I have a bmi of 30 and am unexpectedly pregnant and certainly wouldn't have chosen to be this weight for pregnancy so can understand the extra concerns this brings. I like to think it's making me more vigilant though and I'm listening to my body more than perhaps I would have.

With scans I was told they might have to do a trans vaginal one if my stomach was blocking the view, but that was an early scan at 9 weeks, not sure if that might be an option?

Good luck

Congratulations to your daughter . I have a friend with a very high BMI who is pregnant with DC2, weight same as previous pregnancy which was uncomplicated. She has a c-section but is hoping for a vaginal birth this time. The biggest issues she had were not ever feeling baby move, midwife unable to palpate abdo to get a clear idea of baby's position and great difficulty having blood taken. However we are at similar stages in pregnancy and her scan was much clearer than mine and my BMI is 27!

There are consultant obstetricians and anaesthetists who have a special interest in high maternal BMI (used to work with one, lovely bloke), it might be worth a google to see if any are working near your DD and she could request referral to that unit?

I remember taking a call from an anaesthetist who wanted advice on caring for a woman with a BMI of something like 70 during a c section, I think she had a spinal and definitely had a healthy baby!

Your daughter will be at higher risk of some things e.g. GD but it doesn't mean she'll get them. Ditto she might have some practical issues with scans, mobility later on etc, but not necessarily. I have definitely seen posts on MN from people with BMIs in the 40+ range who have had healthy pregnancies and babies, you might want to put this in Chat too for more responses?

Congratulations :)

Thank you everyone. You've all been so kind x

The reason I suggest that she might want to be under care of those consultants is that they KNOW it's not necessarily going to cause major difficulties and they're more likely to treat her like a "normal" primagravida iyswim, and not blame every little thing on her weight if that is not the issue.

If there are any weight-related problems they have the knowledge to manage them too.

Good luck!

I have had a bmi of 30 for both my pregnancies and no issues because of it ( often the difficulty is getting pg in the first place) however she will have to have a glucose test at 28 weeks (GTT) to check for diabetes and it could make things difficult on her back etc as she gets more heavily pg and also on her blood pressure. Maybe it's worth her speaking to midwife/doctor about some kind of diet/ healthy eating plan

If anything, they will be monitoring her much more closely than a woman with a healthy BMI.
She would or should of been refered by the midwife at the booking in appt, when she next sees the midwife, get her to ask about her referal, she should be sent a letter from the hospital with an appt to see a consultant.
She will also have more hospital appts that a 'normal' pregnant woman.

I have a bmi of 42, and am also under consultant led care because of other health problems aside from my weight, i found it lovely tbh, feel much more reassured, you get to hear babies hb a lot more often and i felt a lot more cared after.
A lot of my friends who have uncomplicated pregnancies, even their first felt like they had been rushed in and out of appts with midwifes, not had them at the time they should of had them etc.

I would just let your DD know, that yes, there are some significant rises in risks with obese mothers, but because she will be looked after very well, and often, she will get whatever help she needs asap.

You could also get her to ask about any pregnancy exercise classes arranged by the hospital that could help her fitness for labour etc, she has a little time to make some difference, even not gaining any more weight, or raising fitness levels will make a huge difference when the baby comes.

How is your DD's general health? I think this makes a huge difference. My bmi was 50 when I fell pg with DD2, but my health was excellent. I had a few issues- SPD towards the end, and frustratingly undiagnosed-till-38-weeks gestational diabetes, despite having 2 GTTs. I was induced but laboured quickly (1 hour) and delivered her naturally with no damage at all, despite her weighing 10lb6! She was very chubby (due to the GD) but is a happy, healthy 1yo now.

My MW was absolutely lovely and supported me wonderfully throughout my pregnancy. I actually declined the consultant led care, although I did (sort of) come under the consultant when I was diagnosed with the GD.

The consultants and MWs etc really have seen it all before, so your DD mustn't feel embarrassed or ashamed.

If she is wanting to lose some weight or try to control her weight gain during pregnancy, Slimming World is a good program and the only one recommended by the Royal College of Midwives for following in pregnancy. I have been on it since October and have lost almost 4 stone now.

Best of luck to her, hope she can relax and enjoy it all.

I'm sure your daughter has found this already but BabyCentre have a board called Plus-size, pregnant and beyond there are lots of positive stories on there

Wow, what a supportive lot you are! DD is in good general health, it's just the weight that's a problem. Thank you so much for all your posts, they really are helpful. I've found the One Born Every minute programme that was mentioned and the BabyCentre board too. I wouldn't have known about them without these responses so many, many thanks .