12 week scan and consultant appiontment tomorrow and dreading it please hold my hand

[faintpinkline]

Tomorrow is going to be a nightmare. Appointment is at 8.20am and we have to drop dd off in before school club first. DP's taking me but he's just been told he has to do a conference call from 7-7.30am which basically means I'm going to be totally in charge of dd while having horrible morning sickness then we have to rush out the house.

I have it into my head for no logical reason that the scan will find something terribly wrong. I'm panicing about all the blood tests as last time I was pg they could never find a vein and I ended up screaming and crying and with huge bruises, they had to give me a local anesthetic on one occasion as they were causing so much pain to me. I've got the same consultant as before and I hated him as i found him really cold and dismissive. They've said the whole lot will take until lunch time

I just want tomorrow to be over. I know its all because I want a baby but I feel like a piece of meat and so dehumanised even thinking about it . DP does not understand he just thinks I should deal with it.

I wish men could get pregnant I bet the whole process would be run very differently

Oh no, you poor thing. Is there any way you can change consultants? If not - just be brave, you've already been through one pregnancy, are caring for your DD AND coping with ms. You're a goddam warrior!!! :o You can totally do this!

Sending you virtual girlpower! x

Yes men do not get it especially in the early days, when you are not showing.
If I was you I would speak to one of the midwife's to see if you can change your consultant or to explain the problems you had last time with the consultant. This is only the beginning of your pregnancy and what ever happens you still need your Dr to be working with you and treat you in a caring manner. It can happen I've had a complicated pregnancy, but my consultant I've been with since 13 weeks I'm 23 weeks now, I trust that his advice is best for my clinical situation. Even when I have found him to be blunt and pessimistic, he has been more caring than some of the midwifes.
You need to change the relationship you have with your consultant as it will make you more anxious than you need to be.

Good luck I hope all is better than you think it is going to be.

Good luck. Hope you manage to get a good night's sleep so you're as ready for tomorrow as you can be. Have to say that I've never found the consultants I've encountered to be the cuddliest of people, but try and put aside the personal reaction and trust that he has your best interests at heart and knows his stuff. Good luck

We will all be thinking of you and you must come back and tell us all that it was all ok.
Big hugs, big MN positive vibes

Thank you

well dd is 6 now so consultant could have improved with time and with any luck my veins have improved

Feel so tense tonight though, would love a few glasses of wine but its not to be

You do have the right to ask for a different consultant if one is available.

Good luck tomorrow. Your horrendous morning sickness is probably a good sign that everything is ok.

Than you everyone.

Well in the end it went far better than I expected.

The scan was fine. There's one lovey wriggly baby and I'm 12+5 which is a few days ahead of where I thought.

The blood test hurt but I told the lady in advance and she was as gentle as possible and got one of her colleagues to come in and talk to me and distract me while she was doing it. Sadly my veins haven't improved but she found one

DP and I talked last night and we decided to decline the downs test so that was a decision made.

The consultant appears to have had a personality transplant. He started by apologizing for the treatment I got last time. He said he read my ENTIRE file last night as once he started he found it compelling and my history was obviously so difficult he wanted me to have the best treatment he could give. He said I should have been referred for counselling and extra support during my last pregnancy and that he was doing it this time as my notes indicated I'd obviously found labour very difficult because of an earlier still birth. In short it was like dealing with a different person.

He has also brought in one of his team who he is allocating to keep a close eye on me under his supervision and I took to her immediately. I just felt she was so kind and compassionate and I could trust her with my life.

Just so glad I went as it turned out far better than I could possibly have expected. Thank you so much for all the hand holding feeling much happier tonight.

wow, what a great turnaround for you!

Congratulations and I hope you can have a more positive experience this time

That's brilliant so pleased for you :) x