Actually having a baby...

[MrsRV]

I've been focused do much on the birth and labour (32 weeks now) that I'd forgotten that I'll actually have a baby to look after once she's born. I know how ridiculous that sounds. Just in the shower thinking about the baby and being in hospital after the birth, as you do, when it dawned on me that I actually don't have a clue about things like, what to do the first time she cries, how to change a nappy, how often to feed and when to swap boobs, how often to bathe or top and tail, how to dress her so she's not too hot or too cold!?!?! Do the midwives help you out a bit? I can see myself at hospital buzzing someone because she's crying and I don't know what to do! I imagine being really awkward and feeling really embarrassed?? Anyone... Make me feel better? Of course I've read loads but the practice bit is where I'm TOTALLY lacking!!

Most new parents start out knowing nothing, and are experts in no time. The midwives can show you how to change a nappy, give a bath, or feed the baby, everything else, you will figure out together. You'll do brilliantly.

I feel just the same as you! I guess all first timers go through it. Many I night I have been awake at 3am wondering how the heck I'm going to know how to look after a baby. One good piece of advice I have been told is that the baby doesn't actually know if you are doing it "right" or not and so long as he/she is fed, clean, warm and cuddled then the rest of it is just details and you get the hang of it as you go along.

Every first time parent feels this way. But you pick it up so quickly. I always used my daughter's neck as a temperature gauge. Put your finger on the back of her neck, if it feels warm/hot, remove a layer.

It's common sense and processes of elimination, that's all. There are limited things a baby is bothered about; hunger, bottom, sleep, temperature. If s/he cries its because of one of the above. if they're all covered then they just want a cuddle.

If it makes you feel any better I bought dd2 home from the hospital last night and we did exactly the same as we did with dd1. Put the car seat on the floor in the middle of the front room, looked at each other and said "what the fuck do we do now?" :o

Yep, that was me 11 months ago. I had never even held a baby!

The hospital were great. Showed me how to change a nappy, bath my DS and breastfeed. It really is very easy so don't panic.

Plus they are more resilient than you think and really won't mind if you put their nappy on the wrong way round for example :)

Yes. It's normal.

I remember looking at my newborn and thinking HEEEEEEEEELP

I didn't have a clue what to do.

I had more training, advice and instruction when I got a cat from the cats' protection league! And that's not a joke!

But, you muddle through and then one day you realise it's been ages since they last slipped out of your hands when you were bathing them (slippery buggers, babies. It's like holding onto a wet, lathered bar of soap!) and you notice that you seem to have aquired an extra 2 pairs of hands and are no longer pinning them down with your foot while one hand searches for the nappy sack and the other reaches for the cream and you hold the clean nappy with your teeth...

and then, 15 months later, when you give birth to your second child and you stroll down the maternity ward in search of coffee the morning after they're born, with the new baby tucked neatly under your arm like a newspaper and putting pods on this one isn't like trying to put pods on an octopus while you're both sitting in a vat of jelly

this made me laugh