Does anyone have a significant birthday approaching as well as a new baby?

[frankietwospots]

Hi all, I'm 40 + 4 with my first baby and getting a little bit frustrated waiting for him to pop out! Hopefully he will arrive before Christmas. I'm 40 on 6th January and, whilst I know that my life will be changed forever with a new baby to care for, I can't help thinking that I don't want my 40th to just pass me by, not least because my mum died at the age of 39 and therefore it's significant in more ways than one. What have others done when faced with a similar dilemma? My original plan was to rent a big house and have an open door policy with people turning up whenever they like, but that might be too ambitious/too stressful. I'm secretly hoping that hubby is cooking up some kind of masterplan but I can't guarantee that will be the case as I tend to lead all the organisation in our house! Maybe I just need a reality check that my 40th isn't going to be quite as I had originally planned it!

First of all, congratulations on both fronts!

I had my 30th in the summer and was due to have my baby the week after (sadly the pregnancy mc).

I faffed about with different plans and eventually settled on a spa day and stay at a country house hotel.

I think your plan of visitors to a house, add in take away food (?) sounds good because your baby will be here! It means you'll be able to sneak off when you need a bit of peace or want to put baby down for a sleep but also still get to see all your friends.

There's no way my dh would have planned anything without me! Organise away to get what you want! I hope you have a fab birthday :-)

Personally, I'd postpone my birthday party until about April but then I didn't cope very well and would be atrocious at organising an open house anyway.

If you have friends or relatives who can do all the hard work for you, and there is opportunity to sneak away, then go for it. New borns are very portable but the LO probably won't be sleeping at night much so you may well be very tired.

Whatever you decide, I hope you have a lovely time and congratulations on your new baby. (Come on, Little Frankie - get a move on!)

Congratulations on baby and 40th birthday.

I think that renting the house etc is a fabulous plan. I went on a large family group holiday when my first born was 2 weeks old, and it was lovely. Time to not have to do any cooking (everyone else did it) and plenty of time for feet up with doing nothing.

Only - do make sure you get everyone else to do all the work, so that you can concentrate on your birthday and baby! Hope you enjoy it!

I went to Le Manoir Aux Quatre Saisons for a fantastic (2 Michelin star) meal two weeks before I had DD. It was fantastic, elegant soohisticated, treated like royalty and no work for me. We explained when we booked that we may have to postpone if DD arrived early and they were absolutely fine with it.

I had DD1 5 days after my 30th. I didn't do anything exciting, went to the Harvester for dinner and watched DH have a drink while not a drop of alcohol passed my lips.

Then I had DD2 6 days after DH's 30th.

So we have some celebrating to do at some point

But I'm not a birthday celebrating type so it wouldn't bother me not doing anyting for our birthdatys.

I'm due to turn 30 when I'm 27 weeks. With Christmas first then my birthday, I've told everyone that any presents are to be for me, not baby stuff!!!

My first is due in May and I'll be 30, at the beginning of July. For the past 5 years we have been on holiday for the actual day then come home to a party. Really excited about the arrival of my LO but can't help feeling a bit down that my 30th might just pass by. Can you really travel with a 2 month old or is that just completely selfish?

I would maybe do something a few months later? If your baby is, say, another 10 days late (or even less) and you have a difficult birth or C section, you might be trying to host a party while very newly post operative. Perhaps you could combine your birthday with a meet the baby party when you're feeling ready?

Thanks for all your replies - some great ideas and thoughts here. Very good point LoveInAColdClimate. Who knows how I will be, both physically and emotionally, come 6th Jan? Love the idea of combining a belated birthday party with a meet the baby party. Thanks!

No problem! Hope your baby arrives soon and that you have a lovely straightforward birth and a great birthday.

I have just had my 40th while pregnant eitn twins.

I had also wanted to have a big celeb but eventually I felt too tired to organise anything. Settled for nice lunch out with myvfriends, dinner with our close family, and a weekend away to spa hotel with dh snd dd1&2.

Next summer we will be celebrating 25 years together and sm planning big garden party for that and twins arrival.to
Me thst makes up for lost 40th!!

I wouldntnput too much pressure on yourself so soon after your due date as you have no idea how you will cope with sleepnes night, feeding etc. give yourself sometime to get settled in your new life as a mum first!

But make sure you get soilt rotten by your dh, you have plenty of reasons!!

Good luck with the birth!

I'm due in a fortnight and turned 40 in September. Was easy for me though. I don't drink and hate parties so a few meals out with significant people and I was happy. Emotionally I found it much harder to deal with than physically. I suddenly felt too old to have a baby and it was quite hard to get past it. Eventually realised I didn't have a lot of choice by that stage!

Good luck and impending happy birthday! :)

Am also pg and had my 40th recently. Just went for meal with some friends, for me that was enough, it was good to have an excuse for not having a big party...!

Agree with Gwendoline though, it did make me feel old to be having a(nother) baby.

I'll be 36 weeks pg when I turn 30 next year. I had been planning something involving lots of alcohol but obviously I won't be doing that now. I think I'll probably go for a meal with dh and friends or be like the queen and have an official birthday later in the year . A friend of mine was in the same situation and she had a low key thing for her 30th and a big party for her 31st which she called her 30th + 1.

Congratulations on the baby and your 40th, I'm sure whatever you end up doing will be fab!

I'll be 30 in May and dc4 is due at the end of June so I'll be about 34 weeks I think. I'm planning on a family picnic in the park with DH, ds1, ds2, ds3, mil, fil, bil and sil. After the picnic and playing in the playground bit it will be back to mine for cocktails (non alcoholic for me, children, dh and fil who are teetotal) with paper umbrellas etc. Then dinner at the all you can eat chinese. We did similar for BIL's 30th and I brought DS3 who was 4 months old and had reflux although I'm not sure I could have done it with a newborn.

My husband will also be 40 on 6th Jan. Small world isn't it? :)

My DD is due on my 40th in April. Really would like her to arrive before but if not, then that will be a pretty good birthday present although not overly looking forward to spending my birthday in childbirth!

Your plan sounds lovely but very over ambitious. I had my last baby at 40 and three weeks after birth was exhausted ,fractious and looked like rubbish.

Postpone till the summer- babies hit hard and are all consuming - but lovely. Enjoy this precious time and party in a few months