I feel really guilty

[mrsshears]

I'm nearly 14 weeks pregnant with dc3,we are really happy about this however i feel an enormous amount of guilt towards my other 2,its really getting to me,i feel as though i have done them some sort of dis-service.
We are in a really good position with a mortgage thats more or less paid off and our dc have hobbies which they will be able to continue when the baby arrives so its not like they will have to go without,i hate feeling like this but cant help it

Wrote out long reply here as you've not had a reply from anyone else. Am only pg with #1 (though my family tend to have a lot of kids so grown up in big families, so have seen it from the kids' POV), so maybe you would get better help from someone with more kids of their own.

Have you tried jumping on one of the threads about 3rd/4th babies? Maybe some of them have similar worries, so you'll know you are not alone.

Would say though, that pg hormones seem to trigger randomised guilt, and if it is not over one thing, it will be another. Every pg woman I know has felt terrible over SOMETHING, usually something that everyone else had never even considered.

Would say though that kids from bigger families tend to be very well socialised, so you may be doing them a favour in the long run. The closest family I know has three daughters, adult now. Very close and supportive group.

Hi, I have 3 dc , two who just left the nest and the youngest 16 is still at home. I can tell you that once you have the baby you will wonder what you were worrying about, just make sure that they can get involved . There is bound to be some jealousy , but that is something that happens and as long as you manage their expectations then you will be fine. Mine still fight even at the ages they are but they also have a strong bond which is lovely to see. You will find that the jump from two to three is not as big as one to two. Make sure that you spend some quality time with your older kids once the baby is there so it is not just about the baby having all your time. Dont be guilty ,children adapt quickly and so will you . IHTH.

I'm pregnant with DC2 and understand your guilt OP, I feel it for my DD too. We're so close, I'm worried about destroying our bond. I was pregnant at the start of the year and felt the same and ended up having a miscarriage at 14 weeks. The two things obviously aren't related but losing the baby made me realise how much he/she was wanted and how much they'd bring to our family. Your children will be jealous I'm sure but think about how much they'll be getting - another sibling to play with, support in later life when you're not around to help, a large, fun family etc etc