feel dead in side please help me

[misspetrified]

sorry to sound so pathetic but i feel like someone has died, i cannot sleep and feel like i am having one big panic attack. i can hardly breathe at times. I'm scared i will not beable to cope emotionally and financially. I lie awake at night going over the same scenario in my head again and again. One minite i want this baby the next i don't. please help me, i'm sorry i'm so pathetic.

Tell us about your situation. It is never pathetic to feel like you do, you sound like you need some help and support.

Hi miss. Sorry this is happening to you, sounds like you are anxious and depressed. Could you ring your GP? It sounds like you need some emergency counselling really. Some degree of doubt is normal but this sounds quite severe. Do you have a dp? Any friends you can talk to or be with. You don't sound as though you should be alone

there is nothing major stressful happening in my life which makes my feelings even more ridiculous,it's just since i got pregnant. i have no interest in anything at all. if i say to my husband that i feel a bit stressed he says well you wanted a baby. I don't normally cry but i do at a drop of a hat these days. i worry about the mortgage, childminders ,bills etc , am i capable of looking after him/her.? when i had my scan i felt completly detatched like it was happening to someone else.
do you think that this is a type of pregnancy condition?

Hi Miss

I think the other ladies are right hun. You need to talk to your GP.

Keep safe

Frog

On first glance it sounds like ante-natal depression. It's very common (possibly more common than the post-natal variety according to some recent research) and can be treated. I had it mildly but didn't get any treatment; I wish I had seen my GP and got some help with it.

thanks everyone i will ring my gp today.

missp I think it's good to give your gp a call but also think a fair bit of what you're experiencing is well within the realm of 'normal'. I had awful trepidation about pregnancy, birth, caring for the baby. There's a massive amount to get your head round, especially the first time, the fear of the unknown is always worse than the reality. Not sleeping and worrying/obsessing compounds things too, it's weird how easy it is to concentrate on the negatives, partly self-defence too sometimes in not investing too much early on. Definitely try and talk to someone, but please don't beat yourself up, your hormones are all over the place and it takes time to adjust.

you sound just like me and this is my third! i didnt feel like this with the first two . I do suffer with depression but i think this is just panic . My OH is hppy and not worrying so y am i? im going to the GP possibly thurs/Fri maybe Fri as i have no work after that.

Hi I have been like that in points of my pregnancy too. I found that breaking things up into seperate slots and writing things down can really help. Try not to think too far ahead and assume the negative.

I was getting really stressed about money, so I wrote down my budget and researched what I was entitled to, the suprise that I would get some financial help really calmed me down.

Talk to mortgage company about taking a payment holiday if possible.

Babies don't have to cost the earth, I've treated myself to a pram but everything else has been lent to me.

The way I handle my 'can't cope' feelings is that I think that I won't have to learn it all in one day when the baby arrives. In my head sometimes I am worrying about coping with a newborn, a tantruming toddler and a stroppy teenager all at once and I get overwhelmed.

Talk to people - my friends funny stories about their pregnancy/newborn anxieties have really helped me get perspective. One friend phoned her mum at 3am to ask if her baby needed to wear a hat in bed, to which her mum replied do you wear a hat in bed? and hung up :)

I guess you need to take care of yourself too, lots of relaxation, there are some good guided meditation for pregnancy cds around. Just all the traditional stress relievers like a nice bath, lots of rest, cut out caffeine, light exercise can help too.

I am still up and down at times and wonder if I'll ever be sane again :) but attacking the irrational worry from all sides with just a few little things has helped me, hope it will help you xxx

How are you misspetrified? Did you get to the Dr?

I just wanted to second that what you are experiencing does sound serious (most def. not pathetic or ridiculous), and that there is indeed an increased risk of depression during pregnancy. Feeling detached, dead inside, and being unable to sleep sound like symptoms of depression to me.

You might find this website useful: postivelypregnant

As the others say, there's lots of 'scary' as well as 'exciting' with this baby business. Completely normal to feel both, but a little worrying if you're only anxious and unhappy.

thanks everyone,i am in on monday with the gp. thanks for all your advice i am going to make a plan for all my finances. i think i am scared of going back to the dark old days of feeling out of control.

i spoke to my gp and midwife on monday and have been referred to the mental health team who i can book an appointment with today. felt much better that night just for talking to someone.
had a row with husband last night so got in the car and tried to run away,he even said didn't think you were coming back.
instead just drove into the countryside and cried for about 2 hours,rang marie stopes, then i thought who am i trying to punish me or him? stop being so bloody selfish so i went home.
had a bad night but am hoping this appointment will make me a nicer happier person.

Just wanted to say hello miss and wish you luck for your appointment with the mental health team. It might be worth your husband talking to someone as well so he knows how he can support you.
Come back and let us know how you get on - and just to off-load if that helps.

thanks bigboobsatlast ,off loading to you lot really helps me,thank you