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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

how to deal with 'any news yet?' comments

23 replies

lightsandshapes · 15/10/2011 12:21

I am 38 weeks so potentially another 4 weeks to go, and I am getting lots of these by email, text and word of mouth. how have others dealt wih these, err, annoying comments?? I think I find them annoying because giving birth is on my mind, not giving the whole of my network regular updates! Thedy'll know soon enough! [hsmile]

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thousandDenier · 15/10/2011 12:23

If anyone ever just said "any news?" via email or fb, I'd just reply with

" bbc.co.uk/news - hope that helps :) "

I was a very grumpy overdue person.

Wants3 · 15/10/2011 12:25

I got them more the second time around as DS1 was 2weeks early so every one was expecting the same for DS2. He was 2 days early in the end. I think you just have to grin and bear it I am afraid!

cravingcake · 15/10/2011 12:30

I read on a thread somewhere recently that you could answer your phone with 'yes I'm still f-ing pregnant, is there anything else?' apparently there usually isnt. Think I may use this one if/when I start getting asked (am 37+3) [hgrin].

Minus273 · 15/10/2011 12:32

I would say 'If there was you would have heard' Annoying isn't it?

lightsandshapes · 15/10/2011 12:40

Yeah, DP doesn't understand why I find it annoying - he says it's natural. However, I feel that people should know they will be informed as soon as baby appears, with a nice photo and the usual anouncement. It's not as if I'm going to gto be hiding baby away in a dark rom, so people have to bash the door down to find out when I've given birth. There's a misplaced self importance I think, like they've gotta be the first to know. Give me space people!! (grumpy - me????) PS. love the bbc news one and 'yes I'm still f-ing pregnant, but don't know if I would have the guts to use 'em.

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corkythecat · 15/10/2011 13:04

Just say "oh yes the baby came last week - didn't we tell you?..." in a very sarcastic tone. Might get you a bit of peace for a day or so.
Am 38+3 and particularly achey and grumpy and cannot be dealing with stupid questions from people who should know better (aunty's, close friends etc)

Latsia · 15/10/2011 13:17

I used to get annoyed by this in my last few weeks with both DC and agree that you absolutely have licence to be grumpy... it's just that when I was on the receiving end of this, waiting impatiently for dear friends to have their DC I was always worried by long (ie 2 or 3 days) periods of silence and genuinely excited for them. Repeat "they only ask because they care" and try not to be too hard on them. Maybe give them some tasks to do, thus "Since you ask, however, I have a craving and could do with a 2 ltr tub of Ben & Jerrys Phish Food. Stat. Lovely, thank you!!"

Secondtimelucky · 15/10/2011 13:23

Send all the emails ones this link. That should deal with them.

MissRee · 15/10/2011 15:22

Beat them to it - daily texts at 7am and fb updates saying "still pregnant" should do the trick!

Tinsie · 15/10/2011 16:00

I'm with MissRee on this, my pregnant BS did regular FB updates so there was no need to call or email her at all [hsmile]

I went into labour before I had the chance to tell half my firends I was pregnant, so haven't experienced this from the POV of the overdue mum-to-be, but as a friend I've always refrained from pestering pregnant friends with questions of any kind. This has always been easier when the pregnant lady wasn't a close friend, as I think friends tend to care (and worry) more about you. So perhaps try to see it as an expression of interest, love, affection etc. as opposed to a desire to irritate you?

SerenaJoy · 15/10/2011 16:09

DS was overdue, and I got so cross I posted this on Facebook. Seemed to do the trick!

Tinsie · 15/10/2011 16:39

I'd be very cross myself if someone responded like that to me and would never show any interest in them or their children ever again. Just saying [hshock]

kleeen · 15/10/2011 16:46

40+13 today and the emails and texts keep coming despite the fact that I've kindly responded several times that I will be rejoicing from mountaintops when the baby comes and they should expect their email accounts to fill up with all of the photos I will send.

Concern and interest is much appreciated, but "a watched pot never boils" seems to come to mind. Comments like "WHEN IS THAT BABY COMING???" don't feel very helpful at this moment.

obviously i'm also a little on the grumpy side.

Tinsie · 15/10/2011 16:54

I think most people don't appreciate how grumpy women can get in the later stages of pregnancy/when they're overdue, otherwise they'd keep thier mouths shut [hwink]

Or maybe they all know at least one lady who has felt the need to share every little detail on FB, Twitter or email (today I'm having a vaginal sweep, I've just had a sweep etc.) and have assumed we're all the same.

mancbird · 15/10/2011 18:11

I know how you feel! 41 weeks today and am getting hourly phone calls from family and friends asking if anything is happening. I've taken to telling them that we just forgot to tell them we have had the baby and he actually arrived last week. Ffs do they really think we wouldn't tell them something like this?!?

blueeyedmonster · 15/10/2011 19:36

I turned both my phones off so people couldn't hassle me that way. I didn't have facebook at the time either. I got asked when people saw me but the look they got followed by "yes i'm just fat" and "oh shit I left the baby at home" meant they didn't really bug me again after that and were sympahtetic Grin

charlatan · 15/10/2011 23:06

I'm only 40+2 with DC2 and already I'm sick of all the messages etc. I know family are excited too but it's not as if I can do much about it! Don't remember it being as bad with DC1.
Note to self if there is a next time is to tell everyone my due date is 3 weeks later then hopefully the messages wont come!!

YBR · 16/10/2011 12:36

I remember from a previous thread that someone advised putting the message out that you are very tired, and that all the calls etc are not helping you rest. Sounded like a good way to re-direct their concern!

Even better get your DH to answer the phone for you and tell people that!

bemybebe · 16/10/2011 12:41

some people just cannot be pleased. show some interest and you are 'intrusive', show discretion and you 'do not care'...

Grin

boxoftricks · 16/10/2011 13:04

a friend of mine extended her due date when she first told people she was pregnant. She told everyone she was due at the end of july when in fact was due in the first week of july. it worked! she gave birth in early july with not one question!

boxoftricks · 16/10/2011 13:04

(not that that idea is going to help you now OP...oops!)

lightsandshapes · 16/10/2011 13:06

boxoftricks - I just said 'october' in the hope that it was sufficiently vague. Obviously it had the opposite effect!

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BikeRunSki · 16/10/2011 13:10

i am now more pg (38.5) than when DS was born (at 38.4). Have resorted to premptive texts every morning. And "I'll let you know when there is anything to tell" when people ask.

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