When do/did you see the midwife first??

[nannyjo]

Over where i am we don't see the midwife till 12 or 13 weeks. I think thats crazy, week 7 or 8 is the highest weeks of miscarriage so why aren't i seen till week 12+?? The heart beat is detected at 6 or 7 weeks.

I have known people who lost their baby at 7 weeks and not found out till their scan at 13 weeks.

That thought of not knowing what was happening to your body was the hardest thing to deal with, that could be helped if you found out earlier surely!

There is probably a good reason for this but i don't know it.

I saw mine at 12 weeks, first time I was M/c at the time and the doctor said 'There is no point my booking you in as you may well loose the PG' Nice!

TBH, it would have been awful , whatever the stage, at 8 weeks or at 12.

I don't think they book you in prior to this since you can only pick up the heart beat at the early stage using a vaginal probe.

what is the point of seeing you early if you might have a miscarriage?

Mine did a home visit at 8 weeks, then I went to see her at the clinic at 12 weeks

agree with mb - they can only find heartbeat at 7/8 weeks by way of an internal scan (i.e. specialised equipment that a mw is not going to carry around in her handbag!).

I saw mw first at about 8 weeks (and she did very little other than check bp/urine and give me some general advice about food). I think she may have had a quick feel of my tummy to check how far along I was. Honestly, MWs don't do many investigations at early appointments.

Enid, cos its a bit of a head mess if you know you have been carrying around a dead baby in your body for weeks and been unaware of it.

but how can a midwife tell your baby has died? they can't find the heartbeat reliably with a doppler until you are about 14 weeks.

oh i thought at 8 weeks the doppler would pick it up?

I had my first appt at 9 weeks - about average in my area, so it must vary depending on where you are.

Oh, and I had a bleed at 7 weeks, so was checked at the early pregnancy unit after I called the midwife - they found a heartbeat with an external scan.

no nannyjo

scan or vaginal probe only

and then if no heart beat was detected an early scan maybe, but if doppler doesn't work then that doesn't work.

I only ask cos i have been having lots of pains and a close friend lost her baby a little while ago so my mind is stupidly doing triple time at the moment and 4 weeks seems like a life time away.

I lost mine at 8 weeks, but didn't find out until 12. But the only thing that would have picked to the h/b at 8 weeks is a vaginal probe, and as others have said, mw don't have one!

for my seconf pg I was refered for an early scan at 8 weeks, to help to reassure me, which was nice.

But nothing would have made the loss of the first easier to cope with, not knowing earlier, for sure.

sorry to hear that MB, obviuosly when ever it is is still an awful thing to go through. I'm just going by what my friend went through but we all deal with things differently i guess.

Has your friend said this to you?

The hardest thing to deal with was that a much wanted baby died. The rest was just trivia tbh. My mc was dealt with very badly, both by the gp and the surgeon, who left me with adhesions that required £2000 woth of teatment and a year of infertility to sort out. Knowing 4 weeks earlier wouldn't have helped me in the slightest

yes she did, that messed her up and tbh it still is, she feels she has no control as she didn't know what her body was doing all the while she was feeling over the moon.

It is probably the whole thing tbh that she still hasn;t dealt with.

It is very hard, but in reality, she would possibly feel just as bad if she had known at 8 weeks. A mc leaves you with a gaping hole and a sense of failure that is hard to cope with, no matter how rational you are.

Has she been offered councelling? I didn't take up the hospital's offer and in retrospect I was being foolish.

I hope she feels better soon

I too had a "missed miscarriage" i.e the baby had died at 8 weeks but all my symptoms carried on so I didn't find out until I had a nuchal fold scan at 13 weeks. Its the same timings here too - you don't see a midwife until 10 -12 weeks which is only a booking appointment and they don't listen for a heartbeat. This pg (and for all subsequent ones) I'll be getting a private "viability scan" at 7-8 weeks where they scan for a heartbeat - its £100 but well worth it for the peace of mind. Once they've detected a heartbeat (a "viable pregnancy") the rate of miscarriage drops massively.....

How do you go about gettting a private viability scan? DO you need someone to refer you?

MY GP refered me for one on the NHS, but his surgery might have been feeling guilty over the crappy way they delt with the first m/c and my complications.

I didn't see a midwife until I was 16 weeks and I've had two past m/c. Had private scan with this preg at 6+3 then again at 9+3 at £176 a pop. Alot of money but well worth it for the piece of mind. I was under a consultant so he was able to refer me. Midwife isn't really the person to diagnose a m/c - that's down to the sonographer. Midwives are there to support viable preg - doesn't sound kind but seems to be true in my experience. Was visited by a health visitor after 2nd m/c - not that she was much use. All I wanted at the time was reassurance that it was still poss to have a normal natural viable preg but she wasn't prepared to give it to me.

it does really depend on the policy of your local hosptal, previously in our area there was no point booking before 12 weeks as the midwife could do no examinations on you, just completing paperwork and taking bloods to check for virus's.

but recently they have brought in a 10-12 week dating scan, so you now need to at about 8 weeks to get your scan appointment sent on time. this still means that the midwife cannot hear the babies heartbeat until around 12-16 weeks via the doppler, so if you have any worries until that point you would need to be referred tot eh early pregnancy unit at your hospital and they would do other checks such as urine pregancy test, to check hormone levels, and a scan either external or internal depending on the gestation.

i am always a late booker, i didn't book til 20 weeks with my first, 16 weeks with my second and 22 weeks with this one! this time was manily because i had negative pregnancy tests, had a blood test and was told results were negative, only to go in again 4 weeks later for another check to be told i had been given the wrong results and was actually positive!!!!

The first appointment here is with the community MW at 8-10 weeks. You get a dating scan at 12 weeks and then have a booking-in appointment and blood tests with the maternity unit at around 14 weeks.