How young was your baby when it started sleeping in nursery

[benne81]

This is a long story (see the cats and babies thread) but I'm thinking of moving the baby into the nursery at quite an early age to make sure that there is no risk of my cat jumping in the moses basket with the baby. I know that the official guidance is that the baby should stay in the same room as you for 6 months - but how many people actually do this? when did yours go in the nursery? My mum was shocked the baby is expected to sleep in the same room as the adults and apparently I was straight into the nursery from day one (although if you listen to my mum we also didn't have central heating/ food/ running water etc in my day!!). I would be really interested to hear peoples experiences of how old theri babies made the transition

After 2 nights - DS is noisy! All fine. Also we have 2 cats - 1 loves DS and tried to get in his bassinet/pram/car seat at every opportunity including when he was in it. The other cat was petrified of the baby. So I would be wary about the cat wanting to be in with the baby. I would either ban the cat from your bedroom and have the baby with you, or ban the cat from the baby's room and have the baby in their own room from the start. Good luck!

when im from (NZ) we are told until they a year old because of SIDs risk? altho it is uncommon the older they are etc a friend of mine ds died at 9months from SIDs so we kept dd with us until 12months... not sure whats going to happen with ds (due dec) as our room is to small to fit a cot

I have just had a quick rummage through the FSID website and can see that they suggest the baby sleeps in your room but don't say why this reduces the risk.

Is it because you may hear the baby stop breathing and then be able to resuscitate?

The chances that you would be awake at the point your baby stops breathing, then would effectively give resuscitation seems sooo remote. I wonder if there are any statistics on this happening.

I personally know of someone whose baby stopped breathing in their arms a few days after giving birth. She gave M2M, called the ambulance and did (by all accounts) everything right, but the baby still died.

I do feel that mothers are told, "do this", "don't do that" etc but with very often no statistics to back up their advice.

I for one will not be foregoing most of the 'banned' food list through my current pregnancy (except the ones I know are proven by science with probable cause for concern) just because the minuscule risks that possibly might just happen, maybe.

Don't feel bad if you want to move your baby into their own room before the 'experts' timeline. If it works for you do it, parenting is not without risk and we have to make judgement calls in life...

I am in a very similar situation! I have 3 cats - one of whom likes to wrap himself round my neck at night and I am worried he may due that to the baby when he arrives. We will be shutting the cats downstairs at night but I can imagine being sleep deprived and fogetting so I am really worried.

Also my mum cannot believe the advice to have a baby in the same room and is telling me not to do this as she thinks it is OTT (and used to put my sister in the basement ) I am planning to have the baby in the same room but not sure I think for 6 months.....part of me thinks maybe not at all but then you get the guilt factor so it is interestin to hear what other people have done

The guidelines state that ALL the naps should be in the sane room as the parents - that they should never be allowed to sleep alone, day or night. This is for a number of reasons but mostly because that way the baby is less likely to sleep too deeply.

It's NOT ok to ignore such well researched, evidence based guidelines. They're not just a set of arbitrary theories, they are based on the risk factors present when babies died in the past. If you want to add risk factors in you and your babies' lives, that's your choice but do make sure it's an informed one. Although as a population overall risk is low, the stakes are very high. It's not like arguing about weaning a bit early, ff/bf etc. There's no coming back from SIDS.

And fwiw all of mine had every sleep with us, including twins. We have 2 cats, I bought cat nests but never needed them because I was in the room with them all the time and because the cats were utterly disinterested in the babies.

Well my baby went into her own room at 4 months because she outgrew her moses basket. During the day I would also put her down in her cot for her naps and used a monitor. I must admit I did not stay sat beside her cot waiting for her to finish her naps. Obviously when she was in her moses basket she could be taken anywhere in the house but once she had grown out of it and was used to her cot she wouldn't sleep anywhere else. I do not see how I cold possibly have continuously stayed with her for every daytime nap! I used to use the precious time to catch up with jobs etc

6 months. Seriously, kick the cat out. Baby takes priority.

It's NOT ok to ignore such well researched, evidence based guidelines. They're not just a set of arbitrary theories, they are based on the risk factors present when babies died in the past.

And you know this is well researched how exactly? I was looking for peer assessed evidence, statistics etc but there don't seem to be any on the site specifically set up to deal with SIDS. Surely there of all places should the research and stats be available to make an informed decision.

The point is it is hard to make informed choices (based on seeing evidence from well researched peer reviewed sources) without it being available. In my experience LOTS of these recommendations are based on NO new research, stats or risk factors. Drinking in pregnancy being a case in point.

If you want to add risk factors in you and your babies' lives, that's your choice but do make sure it's an informed one. Although as a population overall risk is low, the stakes are very high. It's not like arguing about weaning a bit early, ff/bf etc. There's no coming back from SIDS.

Parenting is not risk-free and whether you choose to have the baby in your room with you will be one of the less risky options you'll have to make.

I agree with Likeacandle, it is an each to their own situation. My first child stayed in our room for over a month and neither of us got any sleep until one night i put her in her own room, thinking that when she woke for her 2300hr feed id move her through to our room, she didnt wake as usual and slept hours longer, so that was it after that, she stayed in her own room. My second child went into her room at about 2 weeks (our room is very close to the nursery). I am currently 36 weeks and all going well this one will go quite quickly into her own room x

It is difficult if you don't have the space; for instance would the risks be so significantly reduced that it is worth moving house to get a bigger bedroom?

Without cold hard facts and statistics people can't make an informed decision on whether risk is worth taking, that is my point, the difference may be as little as 1:1000 compared to 1:1001.

... and just because the authorities say so, doesn't mean they have anything to back it up with. The change in policy of drinking during pregnancy proves that.

Someone posted an excellent link on another thread which was an article on the issue of judging the risks posed to pregnant mothers by the 'banned food' list we are given.

"It is difficult if you don't have the space"

But surely you don't need a lot of space....it's just a moses basket, unless you are co-sleeping. What do you need a lot of space for?

I couldn't fit a child in with me, there would be nowhere to get out of bed without stepping on their head!

I could swap rooms with my son or remove all the fitted wardrobes which take up half the space, but I don't see it being so big an issue as to warrant the hassle and expense... he survived absolutely fine in his own room and I am sure the next one will too.

If any of you are interested in understanding where these recommendations are coming from, see FSID website, eg this research paper: fsid.org.uk/document.doc?id=42

It says there that baby sleeping in a separate room doubles the risk of cot death. So that must be from about 0.5 per 1,000 live births to 1.0 per 1,000 live births. Bear in mind though this compares with a risk that is 8.5 times higher if you smoke more than 20 a day when pregnant compared to non smoker [assuming I am understanding the document right!].

And in relation to the original question: DS1, 3.5m (when grew out of moses basket as cotbed too big for our room), DS2 still in moses basket, will probably stay in our room when we get a cot for him as it will be a smaller cot and not the cotbed (still occupied). I found with DS1 that my bed was the best place to feed him (he was an autumn baby so it was cold) and once I had to stand up and take him back into his room rather than just lean down to the moses basket to put him back to bed he woke up properly and I had real trouble getting him back to sleep.

Its absolute nonsense to say the info on the sids website isnt based on anything, of course it is! Its research based on babies who die, and the research says that babies are more likely to die if they are in their own room before 6 months. I would be doing everything in my power to take their advice. If you absolutely CANT fit them in the room, then you have no choice, but surely the baby's wellbeing is more important in those very early days. Of course people will always say "my baby was fine" but actually the research shows for more people that wasnt the case.

"... and just because the authorities say so, doesn't mean they have anything to back it up with. The change in policy of drinking during pregnancy proves that."

wtf....why would health authorities be out to dupe you into sleeping in your babies room or not drinking in pregnancy. The advice is evidence based, so yes they do have something to back it up with.

Jesus.

All 3 of of our dcs have been in our room until at least 6 months old, dd1 7 months, dd2 10 months, ds is still in with us at 14 months. I also had them in the same room as one of us for naps until 6 months, ds still sleeps in same room, unless we have lots of dd 1 and 2's friends round making noise!

We lived in a mobile home when we had dd1 and 2, so were very limited for space. The bedroom could just about fit a double bed, with a crib squeezed into the side. A crib makes a pretty good alternative to a moses basket, as they are very narrow, but lasted all 3 of ours until at least 6 months.

Thanks for digging those out ohbabybaby I will have a look myself when I am less knackered.

So that must be from about 0.5 per 1,000 live births to 1.0 per 1,000 live births.

So given this minuscule improvement in stats would you suggest I spend £100's to give a 0.5% less chance of SIDS? I personally think the risk is completely tolerable and wouldn't bother... I would give up smoking though!!!!!

There is the joy of seeing the research and stats not just the 'headlines'; it allows a more informed choice.

Here is a copy of links on drinking during pregnancy thread Thread1 Thread2

It isn't all clear cut and based on evidence, not all evidence is equal or valid.

And if you are relying on Jesus for evidence - good luck it will be a loooong time coming!!!

'Press Association: 'Pregnant women warned over alcohol'

'Women were advised that official guidance to avoid alcohol in pregnancy remained in place after experts said drinking one or two units a week does not harm a child's development.
Mothers-to-be can safely drink a 175ml glass of wine, a 50ml glass of spirits or just under a pint of beer each week without affecting intellectual or behavioural development, according to a new study.
But children born to mothers who drink heavily or binge drink (seven or more units a week or six at one sitting) are at higher risk of behavioural and emotional problems.
The finding adds to previous research which found light drinking has no negative effect on toddler development, and the issue of how much is safe to drink during pregnancy has caused controversy in recent years.
In 2007, the Department of Health published guidance saying pregnant women should avoid drinking alcohol altogether, as should those trying to conceive. This replaced previous guidance which said it was safe for pregnant women to drink one to two units of alcohol per week.
The Government said its update was not based on new research, but was to provide consistent advice to all women.
Following the latest study, in which experts examined the risk of drinking on children up to the age of five, a spokeswoman for the Department of Health said: "After assessing the available evidence, we cannot say with confidence that drinking during pregnancy is safe and will not harm your baby.
"Therefore, as a precautionary measure, our advice to pregnant women and women trying to conceive is to avoid alcohol."
Janet Fyle, professional policy advisor at the Royal College of Midwives, said she was concerned women may take the findings as a message that it is "ok" to drink alcohol.
"There is no firm evidence that small amounts of cumulative alcohol consumption does not have an effect on the developing foetus," she said. "Because of this our advice to women remains the same; if you are planning to become pregnant, or if you are pregnant, it is best to avoid drinking alcohol."'

Well done with your points about alcohol. Jolly good show. It has nothing to do with SIDS though. On the one hand you say you want peer reviewed research AND you want it to all be on the SIDS website, yet on the other, make spurious comparisons with government advice about alcohol.
You sound like you're looking for some sort of hidden conspiracy theory to justify your own choices which increase the likelihood of SIDS.

We have two cats and started keeping them out of the bedroom from about three weeks before the birth. When DS arrived they were distinctly unimpressed and kept their distance. Having the baby in our room was something we'd planned but I didn't realise how much I'd need him close for the first few weeks. The crib got moved from the foot of the bed to right next to me!

We moved DS into his cot in his own room at 21 weeks. It's been a week and we're all sleeping better. DP shores horrendously and DS mumbles in his sleep, IYSWIM, so they were keeping each other and me awake. Plus he'd grown out of the crib.

The cats got over being loved out of the bedroom very quickly and I wanted DS right by my side. You wouldn't believe how often you wake up to check they're breathing. Plus the breastfeeding would have been a nightmare with him in another room at first.

Whoever said they couldn't get out of bed without stepping on the baby's head - unless you literally have to make your way to and from your bed along a path that is the width of your palm, and your bed is surrounded by walls on all four sides - that must be a slight exaggeration, surely? Also, if there is room for a double bed, there IS room for a baby.

I guess this is just one of those where people choose to make up their minds, and stick to it, whatever the evidence-based research says.

Some people smoke and don't get cancer. Some people don't smoke and they still get cancer. Years ago we weren't aware that smoking causes cancer, then we found out that it does. The official guidelines changed - that doesn't mean that you might as well smoke because people used to say it's harmless, surely?

The way I look at it is that although the risk of SIDS is small, why would I do something that is proven to DOUBLE the risk? Yes, it's still a small risk, but as someone else pointed out, there is no going back.

It's very well to say "what are the chances of one of the parents being awake if the child stops breathing? Next to none, so no point sharing a room..." (paraphrasing slightly) but if you actually look at the research, it's not about one of the parents possibly being awake - it's about the parent's breathing and moving in the same room which keeps the baby from sleeping TOO deeply.

If you actually cosleep and share a bed, the human body is amazing: if the baby gets too hot, the mother's body will cool it down. If the baby gets too cold, the mother's body will warm it. The mother's heartbeat keeps the baby's heart beating steadily, the mother's breath keeps the baby from getting apnea, or at least reduces the chance. Also, the mother's and the baby's sleep cycles end up synchronising, so that when the baby wakes, the mother will be in a light sleep cycle too - meaning that the mother isn't having to rouse from a deep sleep, which in turn means that she will wake up easily and quickly (as opposed to having to drag herself out of a deep sleep, out of bed, across the hall...)

Knowing all that, if someone STILL chooses to put a baby in a room of it's own, then I suppose they have weighed the evidence, and their priorities, and made an informed choice. But people should make sure they are making a choice based on research-based evidence, not based on "never did me any harm / sounds pointless".