Would it be madness to ditch ELCS and go for VBAC in hope I'd go overdue and have a Sept baby?

[otchayaniye]

I am due on August 22, tantalisingly close to September.

I have had a previous ELCS, and for reasons I won't bore you with, I have gone for another ELCS -- booked for 10 days' time. Have agreed to proceed with vbac however if I spontaneously labour between then and now and it all looks good (baby is in ok position this time)

I had been told by a couple of colleagues (one married to a teacher) that August babies can be at a disadvantage when it comes to school and have suggested I hang on, on the off-chance I go overdue and make it to September.

Of course, on a population level, late summer babies may show up on a trend as performing less well, but as my husband is at pains to point out, this is meaningless on an individual level and so many other factors come into play. He is understanding, but adamant that if I am only basing my decision on this, this is small fry and I shouldn't fixate and be so utterly deterministic. He is also cross with colleagues for putting it in my mind so firmly! He also says we are so lucky (am 39) to be having what looks to be a healthy baby and good pregnancy that I should stick to our plan and not get into a tizz about abstract, population trends!

Anyway. I had put all this to the back of my mind and was happy with our decision and looking forward to a calm birth in a few weeks.

But after a very poor night's sleep (which usually ramps up my anxieties) I am fixating on this again and wondering what I should do.

It would be a small chance I guess that I would go overdue by 9-10 days anyway. I could end up with the EMCS I want to avoid before that time. I cannot be induced with hormones, so if I need to be induced it will be by balloon, which I'm not looking forward to...

ARGH.

Oh, should add I was seen throughout this pregnancy by preeclampsia clinic as I had it with my first. So mostly through this pregnancy I thought I would have given birth already, so this August/September issue (if it is even an issue) wasn't on my mind. But I haven't developed it. So I guess it's on my mind again.

At least I'm not alone. I'm due on the 16th September and want to try to hold out till then despite having what appears to be placenta previa and also having a baby on the small side. But I know I have to do what is best and if it is necessary he will have to come early. Fingers crossed all is ok on my scan later.

moonfacemama be very careful when you mention suicide as there is no evidence as yet that birth month is anything other than a correlating factor, not a cause. Besides, the Royal College of Psychiatrists stressed that is it men born in August, September (my father killed himself and was born in this month) and January who commit suicide in greater numbers.

I feel shit enough as it is, without coming on here and reading this!

What otcha said. Not helpful moon face.

My DS is an August 24th baby, he is now nearly 10. His academic ability has never been behind that of his peers, emotionally however he has struggled slightly, and had regular toilet accidents at school when he started. On the plus side though, he is shortly due to take his 11+ and his age could help him out now as it is taken into account in calculating the scores.
I have a friend who's 15 year old DS born 28th august is now in a situation where he has been left school for 3 months and his friends have all been able to apply for jobs, he hasn't been able to as not yet 16 and by the time he can they will all be gone......
On the whole VBAC issue though, if your ELCS isn't for medical need I would certainly try for a VBAC. I have to have my third CS after and EMCS and a failed VBAC and would do anything to avoid being stuck in a 6 bedded ward with 5 other snoring women and 6 screaming babies for 3 nights! Not to mention not being able to move!

otcha i'm really sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. I was just trying to say i can understand why you would be worried.

I had heard that from what i felt to be a reliable source, but it was a while ago and i must not have remembered the facts fully. I genuinly thought it was the case or i wouldn't have mentioned it. I'm a firm believes in full facts and in this case i was wrong. Luckily you were able to pull me up on it. (This is something i really appreciate about mn, bull shit gets spotted quickly). Sockpoppet i wasn't trying to be not helpfull. I was trying to have a frank discussion and not dismiss the op's concerns...trying to be helpfull in fact.

I completely take back what i said about suicide rates.

Though there are other implications for people born in august but these can be avoided as i and others have mmentioned.

Again i offer my apologies and wish you all the best for your pg and family.

Don't worry moonface, I am admittedly hypersensitive right now. And thank you for your good wishes.

I have blithely gone through most of this pregnancy getting on with part time work, looking after our daughter etc. We had some growth concerns earlier on and so was dealing with that (all seems fine on that front, thank goodness). But as my date approaches I have been hit by a rising sense of panic that isn't rational. My heart is beating, I am crying on and off (unlike me) and almost feel like I am in danger of having a panic attack. We are both on leave now and I wanted this time to be close and happy with my family as we gear up for our new daughter's birth and I feel I am spoiling it with silly worries and fears.

My husband reminds me that it is a mitzvah, whenever she is born and that it is slightly churlish of me to pick holes. And that at the age of 39 years old to get pregnant the moment I decide to try (and I have had surgery for Asherman's Syndrome before I had my first daughter) is good fortune. Of course, I know all this to be true and feel grateful, but I suppose I want things to be perfect.

I worry about the age gap (just shy of three years, although my daughter is emotionally mature and intellectually going great guns -- she's starting to read and her speech and behaviour is very impressive, well, to me it is )

I worry that my half-arsed decision to carry on bfeeding her and tandem feed will actually be a Bad Thing rather than a positive one.

I worry about the school issue.

I worry that I'm being selfish going for an ELCS (reasons for it I won't go into but they are solid and consultant supports my choice).

I am basically a ball of nerves.

This is human biology, babies are born every day, every month. The factors that influence their chances are multifarious and complex. With my rational hat on I know that much will depend on other factors. Birth order, private or state education, country lived in, peer group, socio-economic status, and so on.

I'm bowing out of mn now as I don't think in my state obsessing over minutiae is helping, and in fact it's fueling it.

Very best of luck everyone.

I've just had my cs date booked for 2nd Sept - the annoying thing is that my twins won't get pre school funding until January after they're 3 and dd1 was very ready for hers at 3 (she started a few weeks after), but then I wasn't expecting to get pg to quickly or to have twins so they're being born at 37w. They may of course come early and end up being August babies. Not sure what's better but with loving parents I'm sure they'll be fine.