Hi, Please bear with me everyone - this is my first post on MN and is probably going to be a long one!
I am 9 weeks pregnant with my third child. I have never had any problems with any pregnancy (can't get the babies out by myself, but that's another story). When I found I was pregnant, I had one day being really happy, then went to my doctor to check which of my antihistamines I could carry on taking when pregnant. After advising about the medication, he offered to examine me (just externally) to check I wasn't more pregnant than I thought. I didn't think it could do any harm, as my GP is lovely and I really trust him. On my right side there was some tenderness when he pressed on it (quite hard pressure). He said I should maybe have a scan to rule out an ectopic pregnancy.
I went for the scan (transvaginal) but was only about 5-6 weeks, and they saw a gestational sac but nothing else. They couldn't see my right ovary at all. They said this was normal for the stage of pregnancy.
I went back for a further scan and this time they could see the gestational sac with the external scan, and then did a transvaginal one which showed a yolk sac too, and a small cyst on my right ovary. I was told the cyst is quite common and caused by the egg being releases, and that it will just shrink, also that it could have explained the pain. As they still couldn't see a foetal pole, they said I should come back, but again was told the scan was pretty normal for the stage I was at.
The third scan was yesterday. There was a student doing it, until the qualified sonographer took over. The student said she could see "something" but not clearly enough scanning externally, so said I could go to the toilet then started doing another transvaginal scan. She said "your uterus has dropped right down" and was having loads of trouble finding it, or my ovary either. The other sonographer took over but was also having loads of trouble seeing into my uterus. They had the probe inside me like they were unblocking a sink, and it took about twice as long as the other scans, which had all found the sac really quickly. It was quite painful and I had to arch my back up to aid the view (I have a back problem and this was quite uncomfortable!!). They asked if I had any pain that might have been the cyst popping, as I don't think they could even find the cyst for a while. Eventually they found the cyst, then they asked how far along I was. When I said 9 weeks, they said "this isn't a 9 week pregnancy, it's more like 5.5". They said the foetal pole was visible, but no heartbeat as it was too small at only 4mm. The sonographer said "I'm probably not allowed to say this, but it doesn't look like a viable pregnancy to me". She was really abrupt - no attempt to sound sympathetic at all. The midwife in EPAU said they can't say it isn't viable until it is 6mm and without a heartbeat, but she said although there had been development since the last scan, it hadn't been as much as it should be, and it was possible I would miscarry. I have to go back next wednesday for another scan, after which if there is no developement / heartbeat they will offer me treatment to end the pregnancy. Even my husband, who is usually very decisive and sensible, doesn't really know what to think. He says it isn't over yet, but also that he feels very sad about the scan.
Obviously, I am distraught about this. I've had no pain, no spotting that would have led me to believe there was a problem. I wish I'd never gone for the scans in the first place, as all the waiting is horrible. I just feel sick all the time, and I have CFS/ME which seems to have been aggravated by the stress, so I now ache all over as well and feel awful!
I've seen stories online about the scans being wrong, or thrown off by the shape of your uterus etc, as well as stories where things did go wrong. Has anyone else had a similar experience? I really need some support right now, as my husband works away and has had to go to work this morning, and isn't back till Friday. Every time I look at my two DDs I think how lovely this baby would have been, and I don't know whether to give up hope or not. I'd really appreciate your thoughts.