pregnancy in your 40's

[rubyone]

Has anyone been pregnant/given birth past the age of 40? I would really be interested to know how people have fared with trying to get pregnant, with ante-natal tests, with any problems with the pregnancy or birth. Particularly anyone who has got pregnant age 41 or 42. I'm trying to decide how long I can leave it before I try for another child. I want to leave it for as long as possible (for personal reasons) but not if the risk is too great.

Any stories would be very much appreciated.

Thanks

The risk isn't so much problems with birth or birth defects but infertility. Now, I'm a huge enthusiast for older motherhood, BUT by age 45 more than 90per cent of women are infertile. Fertility drops dramatically past 40. Your fertility usually ends around 10 years before your menopause - and he average age for that in the UK is 52. You can work that out for yourself! Also miscarriage rates go up. I know how you feel I am 40 and dh and I are doubtful about having another child (dh has a daughter aged 12) and I too would love the luxury of waiting another couple of years. But the truth is, I probably don't have another couple of years. If you really, really want another child and would very much regret not having one then I'd do it ASAP. Yes, women do get pregnant after 40 all the time - I think Helen Fielding (Bridget Jones author) has just got pregnant for the first time at age 44, but I don't know if she had fertility treatment. Getting pregnant after 40 is a big gamble. If you don't mind whether you have another child or not, wait. If it really matters to you, get pregnant now. Nature is not very PC. I don't want to be depressing or worry you, but the truth is, fertility drops dramatically for MOST women after 40. Do you know when your mother had her menopause? If she had hers late then you are very likely to follow suit and therefore be fertile longer, but even that's not 100% certain.

Also, how old are you now? How old is your baby? How quickly did you get pregnant last time round? You can wait, of course you can! But it IS a gamble. How would you feel if you didn't have another child? It's up to you entirely.

Hi, rubyone. I had my last at nearly 42 - conceived at 41 obviously - no problems with pregnancy, and the birth was an elective caesarian because the others were too. Had amnio, no probs with that either although the wait for the result was horrendous.

There are a few other old mums on here who will probably post in due course. The oldest mum I'm aware of publicly (IYSWIM) is the actress who used to be on Rumpole - Phyllida something?* - she had her first at about 45 and her second at about 48, without help AFAIK - she had given up hope previously though so who knows. Also Jane Seymour who had twins at about 46 (maybe fertility treatment there?)

As aloha suggests, if you conceived fairly easily first time round you probably needn't worry quite so much but don't leave it too long!

*Patricia Hodge - character was called Phyllida - which is a relief as I was getting confused with Emma Thompsons's mother! - thank heavens for imdb.com, I was going nuts then.

Hi Rubyone
I am 38 weeks pregnant with my first, Everything has been great since week 14 when I was bleeding, baby growing well, hardly any side effects of pregnancy, and only gained 6lbs so far! Anxiety levels high due to a 1:141 chance of downs but chose not to have an amnio. Anyway I recommend pregnancy and want to try again soon! Good luck

Shelly

Hi rubyone,I got pregnant just before my 40th and have a one year old ds,my dd is nearly twelve and she was concieved with fertility drugs ,ds a natural "surprise".I elected not to have any antenatal tests except for the 20 week scan.I didn't want the worry and wouldn't have had an abortion so thought why bother.Everything was fine ,ds healthy albeit after an emergency cs.That was nothing to do with age.I must say I was amazed that none of the doctors or nurses ever mentioned my age and even talked about my "next pregnancy" with a straight face!They really didn't think it was abnormal at all!I would say don't leave it as it may take you longer to concieve,there is never a perfect time to plan to get pregnant.

Hi rubyone, I will be 41 next month and am very close to giving birth to my first. I have had a pregnancy without any nasties (just a few minor niggles like swollen ankles, trapped nerves and extreme fatigue) but am going to be induced as (large, healthy) baby shows no signs of coming out.

I had a couple of very early scans due to 2 previous first trimester miscarriages, a nuchal at 12 weeks which gave me a risk of 1 in 610 instead of my age base risk of 1 in 62 and decided not to have any invasive tests. My 20 week scan showed all well with the baby but a low lying placenta, so I was rescanned at 32 weeks to find it had moved up but baby was breech. I had a fetal well-being scan privately at 36 weeks to establish presentation and it was found he had turned.

The doctors and midwives I have seen have all been incredibly positive and haven't seen my age as an issue at all.

However, we will have to decide when to try for number two. My inclination is to do so sooner rather than later as I could easily have another couple of miscarriages (due to some of my eggs being a bit past it) and also the risk of abnormalities seems to increase quite steeply.

Best of luck with whatever you decide to do.

rubyone I was 10 weeks pg on my 40th birthday with dd2. I have one previous child when I was a teenager. So, a generational gap between the two. I had no probs conceiving but think maybe that's because I'd done it before, I think it can be harder if first time after 40. Had nuchal scan at 10 weeks, and triple blood tests and scan at 20 weeks. No other antenatal testing, all results looked good plus wouldn't have aborted anyway. Went into labour naturally one week before due date (dd1 naturally 2 weeks before due date). Long but gentle labour, the midwife said it took longer to "crank up" because of age, normal delivery to healthy girl, now aged 6. What I will say is that the tiredness levels with looking after a baby after 40 was really something. Noticed great difference in post-birth energy levels compared to first time!

I assumed there was a gradual decline in fertility with age and not a rapid dropoff at 40 as mentioned here. Can anyone point to references for this as I would be interested to read more.

I had my dd2, three months ago, 19 days after my 40th birthday. No problems at all, in fact a much MUCH easier birth than with dd1 two and a half years before. I know this isn't quite relevant to your question, but I do fall just outside that age range!

Incidentally, the only people who raised the issue of my age with regard to the birth (I wanted - and got a home birth) were my MIL and dp. My midwife put me on to a neighbour who'd had her first - at home, with no problems - at the age of 42.

A friend of mine got - accidentally - pregnant at 43. Horrific birth, though. Oops.

must attend to the fruit of my labour - hth, honey.

I also gave birth at 40 with no problems. My age was mentioned only once, by a rather insensitive midwife, who told me about the 'risks' at my age!!! She then started quoting statistics to me, which were wrong as I'd been looking myself.And by my boss!!Of course, with 3 others pg at the same time- who was the healthiest out of us all? Apart from tiredness, which everyone gets, I didn't feel any different from the first time.
No probs with birth - elective c/s, and out after 3 days. Oh apart from sharing the room in hospital with a 16yr old, who's mother was only 34( now a granny) and obviously younger than me.
I did have an amnio,after lots of discussion, which was fine, and gave me peace of mind for the rest of the pregnancy. When we were leaving one of the midwives gave us a bag of condoms, which we counted when we got home- there was nearly 50!!(Virgin ones of course) Furthest thing from my mind.

Also just remembered, like polly28, was asked about next pregnancy

Mog, the decline in fertility though your late twenties and thirties is very slight really. In fact in your twenties and early thirties the fall in fertility just means you might take a little longer to get pregnant - there is no reduction in your ability to have a baby. For women in their thirties up to age 39, 83% will be pregnant within a year. By age 40 between 60 and 70% of women will get pg in a year and by 43 most women are infertile just through age. And just under half of all pregnancies end in miscarriage between 40 and 45. So you see in just three years it falls pretty fast for most women - though, of course, not all. Women have been known to get pregnant in their fifties, but it is very rare. I always say that in your mid to late thirties you are pretty sure to be fine fertility wise, but if you are 40 and want a baby, the safest thing to do is get on with it. If you are ambivalent and failing to conceive would not be a tragedy, then again, of course you can wait. If you desperately want a second child then sooner is always better than later when you are 40.

Thanks so much for all your stories. I feel encouraged by them though still remain undecided. I am 38 and a half and have a 14 month ds and do want another desperately, but for various reasons I feel I need to wait at least a year before I try again. I have got pregnant twice very quickly - within a couple of months - though the first ended in miscarriage.

I wish I were younger!!

If you got pregnant very quickly I would think you can very safely wait until you are 40. I really, truly do. Of course, there are no guarantees in life whatever your age, but don't rush into something you aren't ready for. I think it is helpful to know the facts, but you are obviously fertile with no barriers to conception and provided your periods are regular then wait a year or so without worrying about it. If you said you wanted to wait until you were 45, I'd think you were mad but 40 isn't very old in fertility terms.

I'll be 18 weeks pregnant on my 40th birthday next month. My nuchal scan today gave me a similar risk to Susie40 and was v happy with that (over 600 to 1). Aloha's wise (as always) - the decrease in fertility is dramatic after 40 so it might be best to try now. For one thing you don't know how long it might take you to get pregnant and I think despite the worries we have about our children, the risk of losing your chance to have a child is probably higher than there being any problems with it.
Like you I got pregnant within a couple of months both times (have a ds who's nearly one) and you might get lucky again, but it's not something you should rely on. However, I should think you'd be okay waiting a year. Good luck!

I had my 1st child at age 22 (he was 18 this year), 2nd child at 26 (she was 16 this year). My marriage ended after 12 years but I am very happily settled with another partner. I fell pregnant (accident) in November 2003 at age 39 years, it was a shock but we got over that and had started to get excited. Sadly I had a miscarriage at 11 weeks. Since this I am so desperate for a baby - we have been trying for 6 months (I know - not so long) but with my 1st and 2nd child I fell pregnant within the 1st month of trying. I fell pregnant by accident only 10 months ago - I don't want to believe that because I am 40 thats it. My doctor had been most discouraging - mentioning age - old eggs - and the fact that I have 2 children already I should be content. I would love some encouragement - views - and experiences of anyone else who is in or has been in this situation.