How do you bond with your bump?

[Beesok]

I know this sounds like a silly question :) before I got pregnant I read about all the listening to cds, reading out loud to bump etc etc but am 17+ weeks now and still find it weird/strange - don't know really know how to explain it - even when I look at scan dvds or pics I just feel funny like it hasn't actually sunk in :)
Just to be clear - I am ECSTATIC at being pregnant and can't wait for the baby to arrive - in fact wish I could fast forward pregnancy straight to birth ;)

Is this "detached" feeling normal? Maybe will bond more when I feel movements?

Totally normal imo.

I never talked to my 'bump' or played music, etc. Found the concept bonkers tbh! Well, talking fair enough, but music, etc?!

When the baby moves, it is lovely, lovely, lovely and makes it a bit more real. Don't sweat it - you will do grand

I am 16 wks pg with DC2. In both pgs I havn't really "bonded" with my bumps this early, but have been incredibly both times in first trimester and have mostly been concentrating on getting through the day. When we saw DS at his 20 week scan, that's when I started bonding - at 20 weeks he looked so much like an actual baby. We found out what sex his was too - I found it much more natural and easier to bond with a a baby who I knew the sex of, used his name etc than something more unknown. We will find out sex this time too.

I would wait until 20 week scan, it is really amazing and I defy you not to bond with your bump then.

I am pg on my 3rd and we found that on dc 1 and 2 it felt more real after we knew the sex and could start thinking about things. This time we were not going to find out but I found I again had a detached feeling so we have and I feel better bonded already.

I am 30+2.

I don't do any of that stuff because it feels weird. The scans were interesting but more relief that everything was OK (high risk preg) than a feeling of seeing my child.

Now that I get big kicks and movements that helps me start imagining that a baby will come out (just as well - less than 8 weeks til induction!). I also put my hand on when the baby is kicking to see if it will kick my hand. I occasionally speak to the bump when I am alone but that's about it. DP will sometimes make a joke of telling the baby off for sitting on my bladder or whatever. TBH it doesn't seem real and we are resigned to that! I am sure baby will know us and we do love it, but I think the real bonding will come once the baby is out!

I have to admit I talk to mine a lot and address him by name. I am 22 + 1. he really fidgets a lot in there and that is usually when i talk to him. i also tend to talk to him when i get cravings which are definately not mine and tell him off a little when i need the toilet for the seven millionth time that hour or when i am awoke before 8am.

I still don't relate my bump to my baby and he is nearly 2. Just like a big bag full of baby. I liked the kicks, etc. and the scans but didn't bond as such - but no problem bonding with baby.

I completely know what you mean, when it comes to real babies I am the biggest coo-er and pull all sorts of silly faces. But speaking to my bump feels really stupid, I would not play music at all and the best and least embarassing I have done so far was reading my book aloud.

I actually have one of the biggest voices in my office so I know that throughout the day it has lots of interaction, my DH is away for the next six weeks so I am aware that when I get home from 6pm-9am the next morning I havent said a word!!

We dont know the sex, which makes it a lot more exciting for me but I will admit that the downside is you cannot bond as much because it has no name.. when it kicks I think 'aw it's kicking me' not 'he' or 'she' but hopefully it will be worth it in the end!

25+2 :)

Thanks to all your responses - I'm relieved that I am not alone - was beginning to feel a little disappointed/guilty !

I love babies and will cuddle one any chance I get - for the past 4 years have been working as a nursery teacher with children aged 7 months to 4 yrs so have a LOT of interaction with children, babies and bumps ;) and I was always looking forward to being pregnant and now that I am it feel weird!!

It doesn't help that for the past 4 months I have "conditioned" myself to the fact that it's a boy (don't ask - "mother's intuition" + all the old wives' tales hehehehe) only to be told yesterday that 90% it's a girl (baby was in awkward position but the dr said "look here's the bum, two legs and nothing in between" :) and I said "could you please check again!"

I am not upset or anything at all - it's my first and even if it wasn't I realyy don't care about the sex just want him/her to be healthy BUT I do feel confused and now can't get used to the idea that it's a girl and my feelings are confusing me hehehehe...sorry for the long post - this is not a moan or serious issue just felt I wanted to discuss feelings with people in the same boat so pls don't think I am an inconsiderate mum

And yes can't wait for my 20 week scan :)