Asked to work longer than first requested ...

[Newmummytobe79]

Hi,

Just wondering what your thoughts are on this situation.

My boss has asked me to start my maternity leave a week later than I first suggested as my maternity cover has asked for a week holiday that same week. It was in front of all the staff so I felt I had to say it wasn?t a problem.

At this stage in my pregnancy it really isn?t a problem and I know it means I get an extra week at the end of my maternity ? but what if I?m really struggling to work that week? Can I request to finish on the date I first requested?

We haven?t confirmed my dates yet ? this will happen next week.

Thanks x

How far on will you be when you finish? Doesn't sound very sensitively handled!

Hi Rootatoot, I'll be 37 weeks. Which doesnt sound unreasonable ... but I'm up at 5.45am everyday with an average of a daily 3 hour drive (round trip - but don't get me started on traffic jams!).

Don't know if I'll feel so reasonable when I'm huge and tired!

x

The thought of doing 3 hour round trip, up at 5.45am at 37 weeks makes me feel tired thinking about it (and I'm only 26weeks!). It's your call but I would stick to your guns! I mean maternity cover woman, if she wants time off at some point during the period she is covering..well, your boss will have to cope then won't he?

I would speak up sooner rather than later because if she's booked it then it'll be tricky. I hope you have good relationship with boss generally. Perhaps if you explain that you don't mean to mess anyone around but you felt you couldn't say no when he asked, but you are starting to feel tired already and you don't feel a week later at that stage will be realistic, upon reflection? If you end up signed off sick then you'll start maternity leave early anyway! Feel sorry for you put in that position.

Can I ask when you're due?? If it means an extra week of working in the summer then it'd be a def no from me. I had dd in July 2006 and it was that really hot summer, I finished at 36 weeks and worked 10 mins from home but really struggled in the last couple of weeks.

Given your journey, it would a resounding no from me I'm afraid!

Well, that's definitely the wrong way to go about asking you!

I'm not sure what the rules say exactly, but I'm sure you can look this up. Although my recollection is that they are not so strict.

It might be worth reminding your boss that at 37 weeks you will be considered full term at there are no guarantees that you'll be around. If you do decide to agree to stay an extra week but you are finding that it is too much I would be surprised if your GP wouldn't sign you off sick. (At which point your boss could then force you to start maternity leave)

Also, can I be so bold as to ask if this is your first child? Waiting around for those frequently late firstborns can be so boring.

But do what it best for you.

Thanks so much ladies! I thought I was being a bit soft thinking like this ... but it seems I'm not :)

I'm due at the end of August ... guessing it's a most definate no from you now harassedinherpants! x

Oh definitely!!! And then the little madam was 10 days late.......

It wasn't so much taking the time off to have her, but because it was affecting my physically. I also work in engineering so machines & welders made the heat worse, although I'm mainly desk based.

Sounds like your boss has loads of time to organise a proper handover, irrespective of your cover's holiday plans! And, your boss relying on you being there at 37 weeks is foolish on his part - there are a whole host of reasons you might be off then, including the baby arriving early :)

Having said that, if I was asked to stay longer I might consider doing them a favour. Plenty of people do work right up till the baby is born. But it would depend on the nature of the job and the timings.

:) yep this is my first baby - so far from an expert on here!

What's really narked me is that I was pretty much laughed at when I said I wanted to work up to 36 weeks as they are convinced I will be too big/too tired etc to travel to work every day.

I felt they wanted me to finish earlier than I wanted to but didnt want to say it.

I then get my head around it, start my count down, plan to wash curtains and get the house ready etc (with the help of my DH and lovely parents :)) during the start of my maternity leave ... and I suppose I feel like I won't have as much time now.

I'm also a tad concerned as I saw that my 20 week scan measured baby 5 days ahead of my due date, and although they didnt change my dates ... this could push me forward a week.

Saying that - both me and my brother were late! The little monkey had my Mum waiting for 2 weeks past her due date so it could be a blessing really!

x

hello, just wondering how you got on and if you stuck to your original plans? Hope all is well.

Hi Rootatoot

I've a meeting to discuss my maternity leave later this week ... I'm such a wuss that I'll probably say I'll do the extra week and then raise any issues nearer the time if I don't feel up to it. Unless I feel stronger tomorrow! :) Thanks for asking! x

Well I would at least plant the seed of thought in his head that you might end up off anyway if baby decides to make an appearence! Hope it goes well. Good luck! :)

I agree with Rootatoot - don't make any commitments. I have had a brilliant pregnancy so far (touch wood) and sailed into my last trimester feeling strong and healthy.

However, now at 33 weeks I am dead on my feet, sick to DEATH of the commute, unable to concentrate for anything longer than a minute and just fed up.

Fortunately my work is very flexible and I can work from home.

Chances are you will be fine, but there's a chance you may be feeling the strain so give yourself a get-out clause. Especially with that long commute during the summer - yuck.

Good luck x

Good luck for tomorrow......want me to come and tell them??

I think it was unfair to ask you, and I don't think they are really allowed to ask you.

FWIW my first came at 39 weeks, that would give you 2 weeks off work to get organised.