Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

What do you think about breastfeeding?

56 replies

youngmummyb · 05/05/2011 18:32

I know that they say breast is best, and it's also supposedly good for jumping back to pre-pregnancy weight; but i just don't know if i can handle it. It's not the breastfeeding as such, it's more that i'd be a bit uncomfortable with the baby sucking. Any opinions? I'm a first time mum to be and scared lol!!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Mollycat1 · 05/05/2011 18:43

So glad I am not alone, no advice but I am a first time mum too and feel the same, I have worked in childcare for years so obviously know all about the breast is best thing but the thought of it jsut freaks me out.

DH is very keen for me to breast feed the baby and although I have not said no I just dont fancy the idea. I have not set anything in stone and said we would just see how it goes.

G1nger · 05/05/2011 18:44

I'm also nervous, but I'm keen to give it a go and just see if it works. If it doesn't, it doesn't. No harm done in trying, though.

trixie123 · 05/05/2011 18:51

oh dear, have you not been on this site much? I recommend going and having a look in the feeding section for opinions on this but very briefly this might sum up the likely responses (hopefully with the OTT hysterical ones edited out):

Yes the current evidence suggests that breastmilk is superior to formula and if you can breastfeed for any time at all that is better than nothing.
BF is free and does not require sterilizers etc
If you BF you can use a pump to express extra that your partner can then use via a bottle to feed baby. This is good for their relationship and frees you up so you don;t have to be within 1 hrs reach of baby at all times.
If by "uncomfortable" you mean physically well yes it does hurt a bit at first but this sorts itself out fairly quickly and compared to the discomfort of late pregnancy and birth is not really that bad, though that does vary. If you mean feeling awkward about getting your boobs out in public there is an art to it involving sensible clothing choices and strategic use of cloths etc if you want to be discreet or plan ahead so you can find somewhere private.
You can mix feed and do a bit of BF and formula. I did this from DS's birth and it gave me a great deal of flexibility, though you do have to be careful about the balance because breastmilk is a "use it or lose it" thing and if you don;t feed enough your supply will drop to nothing.
If you do FF through choice or necessity, you are not doing anything wrong. You are feeding your baby and it will be absolutely fine. By the time they are 18m -2yrs everyone will be asking about their walking / talking and have forgotten how you fed.

There is a huge amount else but I hope that has given you a few ideas. Beware that you might get some fairly strong posts on this. Whatever you decide, best of luck, and can I suggest NOT deciding until baby is born and then see how you feel.

lolajane2009 · 05/05/2011 18:53

I have to admit because it is the custom in my family and I grew up around it to me it is definate yes... my mother in law seems to grieve that she didnt due to her medication and that upsets me too tbh.

For me the other issue is financially it is a lot better for me to breastfeed and I really cannot ever imagine me bottlefeeding but it really is personal preference. The only thing that annoys me is that some people see them as purely sexual items and for me breastfeeding is definately a huge part of their purpose tbh.

fartingfran · 05/05/2011 18:58

Breast isn't best. Breast is normal.

Hang around Mumsnet for loads of support and advice.

In answer to the title question - I think it's one of my greatest achievements. It provides my children (statistically, anyway!) with numerous physical advantages compared to formula feeding, and it also safeguards my health. It's cheap, easy (once you get the hang of it), convenient and means I can feed and sleep at the same time! And it is a wonderful, peaceful way to bond with my child at the end of a day away from them. The dose of oxytocin you get with each feed is just bliss after being away from them at work all day.

I think breastfeeding is great :)

BeerTricksPotter · 05/05/2011 19:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Loopymumsy · 05/05/2011 19:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

G1nger · 05/05/2011 19:02

I know all of the arguments, and I'm sure there's truth to them. But at the end of the day, I'm a healthy PhD graduate who did just fine without being breastfed for even a moment. That's what'll stick with me if I can't get breastfeeding my child to work.

Flisspaps · 05/05/2011 19:03

It wasn't actually that uncomfortable - I worried too, but actually, stopping was the worst part!

headfairy · 05/05/2011 19:04

ditto the others, breast isn't best it's normal. It doesn't hurt really. At first you might find it a bit painful while your nipples adjust, but really once you're in the swing of it, it really doesn't hurt. People wouldn't do it for 1 or 2 years and more if it did, no matter how good it is for babies.

I know that how you feed your baby is up to you, but (and I'm being a bit controversial here) I think the NHS should start treating formula feeding like asking for an elective section, ie something that should only really be used as a last resort.

ShowOfHands · 05/05/2011 19:08

Breast is just the normal mammalian feeding method. It's not superior, just normal. FF mimics it as close as possible, but obviously it will not achieve anything like replicating nature but it is a perfectly adequate substitute should it be necessary (through choice or otherwise).

You can't really know how you'll feel when you have had the baby. I couldn't hope to have understood how it would actually make me feel until I did it. I decided to try one feed at a time and see what happened. I expected it to feel weird. It felt right. Bloody hard at first but right.

I'm glad I did it. I fed dd for nearly 3.5yrs and it was wonderful in lots of ways, hard in others. At times when she was ill and it was all she could stomach I was pleased it worked out for us, sometimes when I had cracked nipples I wondered if I could continue. It was like every other part of parenting. Sometimes good, often humbling, sometimes very hard. But I learnt a lot and it was a relationship I had with dd. Other parents have their own relationships with their dc and will navigate them through many choices, feeding is just one of them.

ShowOfHands · 05/05/2011 19:10

It's worth remembering that the 'benefits' are in general terms across a population. You'll have bf babies with allergies and ff babies with PhDs. Of course you will. It's a spectrum and feeding only part of it. But in general terms you can say it is associated with certain health outcomes etc.

girliefriend · 05/05/2011 19:10

I think its a wonderful thing to do for your baby and you really are doing them and yourself a huge favour.

My advice is if you want to breast feed then do it and be stubborn about it don't be put off by tutting relatives or annoying hv!!!

Also find a source of support this might be a mate or a relative who has bf themselves or it might be a support group. I found the group a massive help in the early days and am still friends with some of the mums I met there 5 yrs on!!!

Also you need to give it at least 6 wks before thinking 'this isn't working or I've had enough' as it takes this long for everything to start sorting itself out!!! After 6 wks it gets a lot eaiser as you'll feel more relaxed and coonfident and baby has figured out how to feed effectively!!!

G1nger · 05/05/2011 19:12

Does it hurt due to technique at the start? or for other reasons? I understand it's a bit of a learning curve for the baby too..?

LuckyWeKeptTheCot · 05/05/2011 19:13

I thought I would do nothing but BF and found it horrendous and upsetting despite all the great help I found. Felt awful for FF for years but all children are allergy free, all top of their years (so if IQ suffered it wasn't much) and have healthy appetites for all sorts of food. So I know they didn't suffer for FF but I still wish BF had worked out and feel sad when I think about it. SO - give it a try and get support in place BEFORE the baby is born so you have someone to help if it's hard. Some people find it easy - lots struggle and get there in the end, others stop and if you do that's fine too. Your baby needs love and your care, whatever form the milk takes. Emotional neglect damages many more children than correctly prepared formula. Do try BF first though and don't be hard on yourself if it's not for you.

MotherSnacker · 05/05/2011 19:16

Breatfeeding is hard at first, you have to believe in it to stick out the first six weeks. The baby will feed frequently, that's normal. Join a breasfeeding support group, if you have problems like sore nipples due to poor latch they can help you solve them.

After the initial few weeks breastfeeding is lovely and much less work than formula. In my experience and opinion anyway. When you get used to it it will seem like the most natural thing in the world.

Good luck whatever you decide.

Whaddayouknow · 05/05/2011 19:17

All of the above and also bear in mind that not breastfeeding can increase your risks of breast cancer quite considerably, too.

We are mammals and as such are designed to breastfeed our young. If we don;t, there are consequences, some greater than others, some will have more of an impact but statistically there is no contest.
For me, if you do give breastfeeding a shot then you know you have given them the optimal start regardless of what happens next, IYSWIM.
It's hard for me to even get my head around why someone wouldn't give it a shot, TBH.

LuckyWeKeptTheCot · 05/05/2011 19:17

By the way - I haven't managed it beyond 10 gruelling days with any of my three but am pregnant again and am going to give it another go. So that should tell you something - god knows what!

MotherSnacker · 05/05/2011 19:21

"Your baby needs love and your care, whatever form the milk takes. Emotional neglect damages many more children than correctly prepared formula. Do try BF first though and don't be hard on yourself if it's not for you."

Very true.

Breast milk is good for them , formula can't replicate it , but it's important to get it into perspective.

WorzselMaamage · 05/05/2011 19:23

Its one of the best and amazing things you will ever do. seriously, it is LOVELY.

BertieBasset · 05/05/2011 19:30

I tried with dc1, had latch problems and horrible bleeding nipples. Went on to formula within a week. Was determined to bf while I was pregnant and was horribly disappointed in myself when I stopped.

Now 35 weeks pregnant with dc2. Am going to try again, I think I know where I went wrong and fingers crossed all will go well, BUT if it all goes wrong I am going to ff and enjoy my baby. And not feel guilty.

One of my best friends really didn't want to bf at all, gave it a go at the hospital and loved it! She fed exclusively bf for 6 months!

So I would say, give it a go and see how it works for you. You might be a natural or you may decide it isn't working for you and baby. Everyone's circumstances are different

LuckyWeKeptTheCot · 05/05/2011 19:31

It is for some - for some it really isn't. Just try and it don't feel guilty if you stop. But I hope you are one who loves it. I feel strongly about it because I was told over and over again how lovely it would be and I really don't think it was good and honest preparation. I wish I had known how much it can hurt, how frustrating and tough it can be - I think I would have had a more realistic idea and persevered - maybe even to the lovely stage! I was ready for the pain of labour and did that with no pain relief because I was mentally prepared (and lucky too!). I was led to believe that BF would be this amazing bonding experience and it was utterly depressing and made me feel less close to my baby. Please don't think I am trying to put you off - quite the opposite - just it isn't always easy or lovely - and if you know that from the start you will be ready in case you need more help than you realised you might.

TheSecondComing · 05/05/2011 19:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

youngmummyb · 05/05/2011 20:17

thank you everybody who commented! i had no idea i would get so many replys!

the advice has really helped. i think that perhaps i should definitely try breastfeeding, even if it's only for a couple weeks and see how things go. like many of you said it's about how i feel and everyones different.

so glad i joined this website! as i'm a first time mum and i'm also young it's all a bit daunting! but very excited and relieved i can log on here and get any advice when i need it. thankyou:D x

OP posts:

thejaffacakesareonme · 05/05/2011 20:58

When DS1 was born I had the idea that he'd just latch on and know what to do. It took quite a bit of perseverence though before he got the hang of it. Don't be afraid to ask the midwives / health visitors for advice if you want it. Many areas also have special breastfeeding advisers, although the midwives don't necessarily tell you about them. It was one of the advisers that got the problems that DS1 and I had sorted out. If it hadn't been for her I'd never have contined breastfeeding. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Flip

1 2 3