Feeling like its a strange dream, not reality?!

[Fooster]

Hi Everyone

I'm 34 weeks +1 and its so silly, but is anyone else feeling like this is some weird dream! As if you're not actually going to be a Mum! I feel like its a nice little idea that may happen in the future not circa 6 weeks! I love my baby kicking me and turning around etc, but it still doesn't feel real.

At the same time though, I'm worried something will go wrong and I won't be a Mother which is why I don't feel like one. When is it supposed to kick in. I look at my friends babies and can't imagine me having one of them!

I hope that makes sense to someone as I feel like I'm going mad or something.

Help!

I very much felt like that with my first especially as I'd already had a first trimester loss. I couldn't believe we would get to have a baby - pregnancy I could understand, but being a mummy? Seemed a bit weird to me and I was sure it wasn't going to happen.

When I went into labour spontaneously (and unusually precipitously!) at 36w6d I was in denial and swore it was the curry until the midwife pointed out I was 7cm and could feel her head. Even then I wasn't even really thinking of baby, just the labour.

Even when she was born I thought she was lovely, but belonged to someone else. I didn't even know how to pick her up (it was a relief when the photographer woman did as she could then hand her to me as I was too scared to touch her in case I did it wrong!) It was really quite odd taking her home shortly after the birth and nobody coming with us. But we never did break her - although she's quite good at doing that herself nowadays!

I think at some point I must have adjusted mentally because she's 4.5 now and very much part of the furniture - probably over the first few sleep-deprived weeks.

Now expecting DC3 and I'm 36 weeks. I can't imagine being a family of 5!

You'll do great - your feelings are perfectly normal :)

I felt exactly the same with my first! I was the first of all our friends to get pregnant and spent most of the pregnancy in a state of "la la la... I'm not listening". I remember not even paying attention at a pre-natal birth class because it was aaages until my baby was due (about 6 weeks!).

I did have a massive wake up call whilst on mat leave though - it just hit me one day that I was going to have a BABY and be a MUM! I spent about 2 hours sobbing on the living room floor, just let it all out and then felt different afterwards, like I'd finally faced up to my future! Talk about a drama queen moment!

I know exactly what you mean. For my DD my first reaction when they put her on my chest was "OMG there's a baby!!!" It did take me quite a while to feel like she was mine although I did have PND. I have heard from others though who have said that the 'immediate rush of love' is a bit of a myth. Don't get me wrong it can and does happen its just not a given - just like the actual birth everyones experience is different.

Thanks everyone! I feel better knowing I'm not alone, I thought I was mad!

I just hope it hits me soon, we've bought all the things we need and I look at it all and think 'aw, that's nice' not 'that's for MY baby!'

SingingSands! I'm the same at the classes, I sit in my own little world, thinking 'yeah, yeah... labour... pains... breathing.... dilation...' Whilst everyone else is listening intently or taking notes! Even my OH is asking lots of questions about the birth that I probably should be asking.

Just glad I'm not alone. I go off on maternity leave next week, so maybe it'll hit me then...