So fed up - Ovulation questions...

[sandyfeet1]

Hi everyone

First post :)

I have lots of questions, am just so confused. I have a 28 day cycle and have used the ovulation sticks a few times but still have a few questions, which may be silly.

1. On an ovulation calculator on the net, it says that day 12-14 is ovulation. Does that mean that ovulation actually occurs on day 14 i.e. the egg leaves on its journery on day 14 or on day 12?
2. Are there more chances of conceiving on day 11/12/13 or 14?
3. If I had conceived on day 13, would i still feel ovulation cramps on day 14?
4. Or, does the sperm basically have to hang around from day 13 and wait for the egg to leave on day 14 and travel towards it from day 14 onwards?
5. Is day 14 basically the last day the conception could happen?
6. When you get the happy face on an ovulation stick, does that mean that you are actually ovulating i.e. egg has left, or that it is reading the hormone which means you are about to ovulate.

sigh

thanks.x

Taking Charge Of Your Fertility is a very good book if you want to understand.

Basically, it's very difficult for any online calculator or method of monitoring to tell you exactly when you ovulate. It's not quite that specific but you can understand your body and work out what is probably happening by looking at the signs (temp, ewcm, cervix shape, ov sticks etc).

The egg is released and either it is fertilised by a waiting sperm or you have sex very soon after/around ovulation and fertilisaiton happens. Sperm can live in your body for up to 5 days roughly in the right climate so you can have sex on day 10 and on day 14 for example the egg will release and meet a waiting sperm. The egg is only fertilised after/on release and deteriorates quickly. You've got hours, probably not more than a day at the outside before it is no longer viable.

The happy face on your ovulation stick tells you that it's picked up a hormonal surge. Doesn't mean you have ovulated or are about to ovulate, only hints at a possibility.

Have you tried temping. Your temp will go up after you ovulate and stay there. It will remain up (or go up a bit more) if pregnant but drop down if you're not.

As a general rule if you're just trying and have no known fertility issues, sex every other day is enough.

And the ovulation on day 14 of a 28 day cycle is an average. You could be ovulating much earlier or later. So sex every other day covers all your bases.

I'd just enjoy having lots of sex and give it a few months if you're only just starting out. It can become a chore too quickly and really this should be a lovely, hopeful, enjoyable time.

But if you've been trying for a long time with no success then perhaps see a GP.

I agree with ShowOfHands!
Enjoy having sex as much as possible as often as possible. It's fun starting a family.
How long have you been trying?

thanks both for the quick reply (and i now realise that i've posted in the wrong forum sorry!). the problem is that both hubby and I work full time and have a LO already, so the usual problems of tiredness etc and every other day just really isn't happening at the moment.

So I'd like to get the days right so that there is more chance of it happening ;)

thanks for answering. If it has not happened this month I will start temping.

Have sex every two to three days: no more, no less. Forget about the ovulation sticks for now, is my advice. Given your regular cycle, you can take the online guide as a rough estimate of when you ovulate, but it can vary from woman to woman. I spent the first 7 months of TTC overthinking everything and having sex far too often. The month I conceived was the month I gave all of that up and just had sex every two to three days throughout the month x

By the way, make sure your partner is wearing loose underwear, doesn't take baths or use a heated seat in his car, etc... And it's important to remember that the having sex every two to three days recommendation is about keeping his sperm optimal: giving it time to refresh and stay fresh. Do you know there's something like a 70 to 90 day production cycle for sperm? He needs to look after it! ;)

I also have a 28 day cycle and thought i was text book day 14 ovulator but we conceived on day 11 or day 17 so you never know, just go for it and try not to think too much about it (i know its hard) but the first month i stopped obsessing about it so much was the month i got pg so stress can play a part!

Everybody says that so it must be true :D

TMI, but I could feel ovulation cramps about 3 hours ago (which is day 14 for me). Do you think there would still be a chance of conception up to 28 hours after that (i.e. tomorrow evening)?

Sandy - none of us has all the answers. We can only really go on what we get told, while one of the things I realised - after 8 months of TTC - was that I was as clueless at the end as I was at the beginning about when ovulation actually occurred and when fertility was on or off. It's my opinion that you should keep having sex throughout the month, even after you think ovulation takes place. I suspect that one month (at least!) I stopped trying too early as I thought the 'window' was closed. So my advice to you - have sex tonight if you can, or tomorrow if you can't, and just keep trying.

Don't think DH will be up for it tonight unfortunately. Here's hoping last night did the trick. :o

Here's hoping! And don't forget about the night after tomorrow :)

Thank you all for replying to silly questions :o.

Shall keep you posted!

I think sperm can live up to 5 days in your body but eggs die alot sooner so technically u can have sex before you ovulate and still get pregnant- im no expert though!

Hilltop is right, I believe. Have you watched the Great Sperm Race on 4od, Sandy? www.channel4.com/programmes/the-great-sperm-race - that'll clear a few things up, I'm sure, and great entertainment.

Get a copy of Taking Charge Of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler - it will answer everything

in the meantime, just enjoy having sex every 2-3 days

Many doctors say that calculating your ovulation can actually hinder your chances of getting pregnant.

Some reasons for this are that even though you are checking and counting, the egg may be released at an unexpected time and you may miss the window.

Some couples 'store up' until the days when ovulation is expected and this can actually lower chances as a man needs to release ejaculate regularly to have a healthy new batch available. When sperm has sat doormant too long, it kind of goes stale lol.

Because of the previous point, it is actually better to have sex every two or three days.

And one common misconception is that it is better to have sex on the day of ovulation itself, but in fact it is actually better to have sex two or three days before so there is viable sperm waiting for the egg. Sperm can live very well up to two days and even three for optimum chances of fertilization. Sex on the day is also great but it is good to have those little swimmers already there just in case.

In short, just have regular sex and preferably every two to three days.

Oh and a womans contractions during orgasm help pull sperm upwards in the right direction. Better to orgasm with your partner or just after he ejaculates. If you happen to orgasm before, it is good if he can ejaculate within a couple of minutes after so there is still that chance of the pulling effect helping things along.

Hope this helps, I'm sure you know some of this already but just thought I would share what I have learned. Good luck!!