worried about paternity

[whitt]

Hello all! Il get straight to the question. My husband and I were separated for a while and I made an awfulll mistake and had one night stand with an ex on sept 4th. My husband and I worked things out and got back together at the end of sept. We had sex sept 28th and the beginning of october. I had my period inbetween the two men, starting on sept 23rd. I am beating myself up about the paternity. I had a ultrasound on nov 4th and I was 6 weeks, making my due date 6/30, which matched up perfect to my lmp. I then had another scan on dec 6, and it said I was 11 weeks, moving my due date to 6/26. Only a 4 day difference but alot to me. And I also had a scan at 19 weeks, still confirming a 6/26 due date. I am so scared and worried andj know my husband is too. Theres a 3 week window in the one night stand and my husband! I need answers please

I'm no expert but I would think if you had a peroid in between the two it would more than likely be your husband that you got pregnant by, as if you had got preg by your ex then you wouldn't have had that peroid, but im sure someone else will be along who knows better than me.

Hope all works out for you.

I am a tad confused. You say there is a 4 day difference but it was 24 days from when you slept with your ex and then your husband.

FWIW I only had a 1 day difference in my scan and I was not happy as I knew when I had conceived.

Scans are accurate to +/- 5 days at 3 months pregnant. As the pregnancy goes on, the scans become less accurate.

Sex with ex on Sept 4th
Period Sept 23rd (19 days later)
Making fertile time = 14 days after this +/- some days = Oct 6th +/- a few days
Sex with DH on Sept 28th and start of Oct makes the baby his.

A baby conceived on Sept 4th would have been 8 weeks and 4 days plus the 2 weeks they add where you weren't pregnant = pregnancy defined as 10 weeks, 4 days - no way could this have shown as 6 weeks, even given the 5 day scan inaccuracy.

Relax and good luck.

For the baby to not be your DH's child then the baby would have had to have really been 9 weeks when you had the '6 week' scan. A 9 week baby and a 6 week baby are very different.

Also very unlikely if you had a period inbetween the two.

Thank you! I've asked my doctor, who prob thinks im a mad woman but he sas there is nothing to worry about but I can't help it! I love my husband and am so glad we forgave me for the affair but I would be devastated if it was someone elses baby :(

Fourfortyfour; im sorry for the confusion, what I meant was a 4 day difference in the two ultrasounds and I wanna add, the ex didn't even ejaculate

Actually your husband has nothing to "forgive" you for as you were separated and therefore could shag who you wanted.

I'm with 444, WTF is there to forgive - you were separated!!

Yea y'all are right but I should have waited until divorce was final if that was what I wanted to do. Im just scared the sperm lived from the sex on sept 4th and wha if I ovulated late?! Ughhh

I'm due on the 24/6, and I conceived at the beg of Oct... you will be fine!

You're over thinking this. sperm can live up to 7 days, 7 days... and then you had a period meaning you probably didn't conceive. Everything thing you have said points to it being your husbands.

And I'm with the others who say if you were separated then you were separated and can do what ever and who ever you like!

congratulations on your pregnancy!

Ok thanks you all! And I have one last question..if I had my lmp on 9/23 but my edd is 6/26 that means my lmp should be 9/19 but wasn't! How does that work? And that means I conceived a few days after my period?!

You conceived on about cycle day 10, which is perfectly possible. I have the same due date as you and conceived on 3rd October (yes, I do know exactly :o).

All of my children have measured spot on at the six week scan, then 4-6 days ahead by the time of the NT scan. Growth is really, really precise and accurate (+/- 5 days, normally more like +/- 3 days on scans) until about 9-10 weeks when babies start to show their genetics and start becoming different sizes.

I would eat my hat if your baby was not your husband's!!

I have similar dates but got told Im due 1st July and my LMP was 24th Sept but at my 20wk scan they said im measuring a wk further on so going by u ladies this could be right - i didnt want to get my hopes up so was still thinking 1st July- i assumed I conceived 11th Oct but it could have been the 4th or 5th then??

hilltop, what did they say at your 12 week scan? It's definitely possible you conceived 4th/5th October, but I wouldn't judge it just on a 20 week scan as by that stage there are variations in growth. The 12 week is much more reliable - I had scans at 8 and 12 weeks which both agreed with the dates I know are right but by 20 weeks I was measuring nearly a week ahead!

aww crap I had my scan at 10 wks not 12 and they had me a day behind wat I thought so 2nd July, they went by wat I thought and put down 1st July which I thought was weird, I have app on tuesday so will ask again although I dont have a scan so dont know how much they can tell me, but i think ill stick with 1st July.

My due date is day after yours and I def conceived on 29th Sept...unless it was an immaculate conception! Try not to worry and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy.

Hey you guys so I was in an abusive relationship and one day got enough balls to leave. The night I left I had no place to stay but a friend offered and I accepted. I felt so ashamed and stressed out eventually leading to a one night stand with that friend. The date was april 25 or 26 seeing that it was late of 2019. I later returned back to my ex because I felt tooken advantage of that night. We had sex on the 27 and the days following. Dr's said I concieved may 1st. I'm confused as to who the father is. I used condom with the one night stand but for some reason I feel like sperm might have leaked out the opening when he became soft. I am due January 22...I'm scared!!!😞🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

do you have a update as I'm in a similar situation?