What would you do? Long, sorry.

[briefcasewanker]

I'm 12 weeks pregnant with DC2, first scan tomorrow. Midwife said i will have consultant care for this pregnancy (not sure what that means exactly) because of previous traumatic birth. Here's what happened:

Induced at 40+10, cope with contraction well up until waters are broken, was moved into private room where i had massive contraction, followed by another and another with no gap i had pethedine but i vaguely remember midwife saying something about my uterus being over stimulated??? My contractions stayed like that up until i started to push.

Pushed for what seemed like hours and hours, DC1 was stuck so they go the ventouse out which didn't work, then the forceps. They cut me but i tore on top of the cut and ended up with a 3rd degree tear and a 9lb 6oz baby.Labour was about 18 hours.

DC1 was blue when she came out, they gave her oxygen and she was fine, they weighed her, got her dressed and then they were getting me to sign something and i was taken for a spinal to be stitched up. (i had begged for and epidural during labour but didn't get one).

So, i spent the first couple of hours of her life on an operating table.

I was on painkillers for a few weeks after i came home but couldn't sit down comfortably for about 6 weeks after. Luckily have healed very well.

I still can't think about the birth without getting a bit teary, and looking back now i obviously had PND for the first year od DC1's life, though at the time i thought i was doing ok.

In my position would you have a c-section? I know its not the easy option, but if i tore again i'm worried the damage could be quite bad. Sorry for the ramble, but when i talk to people about it i get the impression they think i am being a a massive wuss, and of course labour is painful.

I would sit down and have a discussion of my previous birth with the midwife. She can look at notes and explain what happened and likelihood of it happening again.

Then you can make an informed choice

A c-section is a sensible option to consider I think, but not necessarily the "right" answer - only you and your doctor can decide that. Consultant led care just means you will get some apts at the hospital (not necessarily with a consultant, maybe just with one of the consultant's team of less senior doctors) as well as with your midwife.

I spent the first few hours of my DC1's life on the operating table too, and that was after a c-section (emergency one though - I had an elective with my second child and that went more smoothly, but there are no guarantees).

I understand your worries about damage, though as you probably know there are also risks of damage to bladder etc. with a section - also the 6 week recovery period is similar and the 24 hours after any section are not pleasant - even with one that goes well it is horrible not being able to sit up unassisted to pick your baby up when he or she cries and not being able to go to the loo although you feel as if you absolutely have to... On the other hand I could sit down fine after both sections - I just couldn't get up again or walk faster than a snail once I was up!

Talk it though lots with midwife and the doctor when you get your hospital apt through, and ask your midwife if she can refer you for any councilling or advice locally, rather than talk to friends and acquaintances who may share very personal opinions and experiences rather than balanced advice!

Good luck, and remember nobody will give you a prize for suffering and being frightened about the birth, having a natural birth doesn't make you a better (or worse) mother than having a section - also don't let anyone tell you you won't be able to breast feed if you have a section - that is total nonsense, I breast fed both my babies born by c-section and intend to do the same with this one too!