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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Discovered last night i'm pregnant with no.3!

17 replies

bobinsky · 08/02/2011 06:57

We weren't trying, but were just avoiding 'that time' as I didn't want to be carrying on taking contraception due to weight gain etc. Now the one thing that had me sleepless last night was when to tell ds (6) and dd (4). Ideally i'd like to keep it schtum till 20 weeks - but that would be unrealistic! When have other mumsnetters enlightened their offspring?

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buttonmoon78 · 08/02/2011 07:13

Congratulations! 3 is a wonderful number. Well, it was for 3.5 years and now we're having 4!

I always tell after the 12 week scan. 6&4 are not so young they'll get fed up waiting and they can have a lot of fun looking at pictures of growing babies on the internet etc. And they're old enough to twig if they're the last to know and get upset.

IMVHO, obviously...

captainbarnacle · 08/02/2011 07:35

Congratulations!

Mine and 4 and 2 - I am not telling them! I am not telling them for as long as I can hold out. Maybe after 20w scan? Maybe when I look 'strange'?

Friends have asked if I've told them and they respect my reasons (am 13w) but look at me a bit odd :)

ImFab · 08/02/2011 07:45

We told ds1 when he was 3 but only because (at 12 weeks) we were telling PIL and felt ds should know first. I then miscarried so wished I hadn't said anything. With our next pregnancy I think it was after the first scan.

Highlandgirl · 08/02/2011 08:55

Do your DC's have a good grasp of time yet, ie. concept of days etc etc?

I only ask as my friend had her DC's asking her everyday from 12 weeks if the baby was coming today, drove her bonkers!!!!

Crawling · 08/02/2011 09:15

Hi I also pg on no3 I have a 5yo and a 18month old. I like you want to keep it from them till 20 weeks.

What we did last time when ds was 3 was draw lines on the wall for the babies imagined size up to week 42. So ds crossed one off every week and if I went early we were going to make it fun and say the naughty baby was too excited to see DS and snook out early. It gave ds a time limit and meant he wasnt asking when the baby was coming.

captainbarnacle · 08/02/2011 09:31

That's a brilliant idea, Crawling! Can I nick it? :)

DS1 thinks his birthday is next week - this baby will be born hopefully before his 5th birthday. There's no way he will wait nicely until then!

Crawling · 08/02/2011 09:41

Feel free to steal it, it really helped DS and made him feel included

TallulahDoesTheHula · 08/02/2011 09:55

I'm 13 weeks and told the DCs (5yo and nearly 3yo) after the 12 wk scan.

They have a calender that they tick off each day on after dinner and we write any big events on it so they know a vague idea of when to expect things to happen.

Ds1 knows that the baby will come in August - yesterday he pointed to August on the calender and said 'this is when the baby will come ALIVE!' which made me laugh.

I wanted to make sure that we told the DCs at the same time as we started telling other people so that they wouldnt over hear anything and not be sure what was going on.

wigglesrock · 08/02/2011 10:16

I am due dc3 in 8 days!! I have 2dds (5&3) I told them after 20 week scan. Just to warn you this pregnancy has absolutely flown in, seriously. Good luck.

Linda40 · 08/02/2011 13:17

Hi, Im 5 weeks with number 3 and wont be telling DDs (aged 10 and 6) for quite a few months as i told them last year and then had a MC.

Having an early scan at 7 weeks, Im keeping everything crossed :)

Original poster

bobinsky · 09/02/2011 13:27

Thanks guys!

at the moment only myself and hubby know - as I am only 4 weeeks and 2 days it is still early. My eldest has a good grasp of time, but not the youngest. I think i'll leave it till after first scan and deliberate about telling them then!
Crawling - I like your idea also and will pinch!
And wigglesrock - good luck with your imminent arrival!
Linda40 - i've got my fingers crossed for you too!

OP posts:

lostinwales · 09/02/2011 13:32

You'll have the same age gap as I have with my three! It's really good although DS3 has never got the hang of the fact he is small. He looked at a photo of himself with his brothers and cousins last year and wanted to know why he looked like a baby (he was three).

I told my two after the 12 week scan although it was kind of forced as DS2's nursery closed unexpectedly on the day of the scan so he had to come with me. I would have gone with telling them at around that time anyway.

girlfromdownsouth · 09/02/2011 13:46

It is possible to wait until 20wks. Mine are 6.5 and 8yo. We didn't tell them for ages as I had a lot of problems with the pg, so ended up telling them at about 15wks and they were quite incredulous. They couldn't believe that I "had a baby in my tummy". I was quite careful with what I wore and didn't undress in front of them if I could help it. They are so caught up in their own worlds they probably won't really notice.

Original poster

bobinsky · 09/02/2011 14:21

Hey lostinwales i'm glad that the age gap has worked well. Was thinking that ds will be going to secondary school when dc3 starts primary. That is a pretty scary thought! Another consideration is that with ds - very little morning sickness. DD on the otherhand - sick almost everyday of the pregnancy! I can laugh about it now but crikey I hope it isn't going to be like that this time! So i'll see how I feel and try and eek it out a bit later than 12 weeks.
And girlfromdownsouth i hope the rest of the pregnancy went well.

OP posts:

perpetuallypregnant · 09/02/2011 14:37

I had my 3rd when ds was 7 and dd1 was 5, they are now 14, 12 and 7.
I loved the age gap as it meant I could focus on the baby while the older ones were at school plus they weren't jealous of the baby as they were 'grown up' and loved her as much as we did.

I say did... They all fight like cats and dogs at the minute and 8m old dd3 is the new 'baby'.

Am also pregnant with dc5 :)

lostinwales · 09/02/2011 15:03

The age gap has worked really well, the older two are wonderful with their little brother and having them out at school in the day was a real luxury, lots of time for my baby and the confidence being a mother of three brings. He's done everything ridiculously early though, he could swim at 2, plays football with the year sixes, he's always been included by the boys and their friends so he doesn't see why he shouldn't be able to do what they do.

I do find it quite odd that DS1 is off to secondary a term after DS3 starts primary full time. Good job it's a lovely school otherwise that's a long commitment to waiting in the playground! Which makes me realize that's where I should be, oops, it's DS1's birthday, he's so grown up now (11, sob)

girlfromdownsouth · 10/02/2011 11:15

bobinsky I am 18wks now so hopefully the rest of the pg will go well. I wanted to wait longer to tell the children and other people, but hubby was so keen to tell them so I relented. They have been so excited and sweet about it. The morning after I told them DS came in at about 6am (grr) with a teddy for the baby to sleep with so it wouldn't get lonely. Awww.

lostinwales I am so glad to hear that the age gap worked out. I have wanted DC3 for about 4 years and really worried about such a big age gap as my other 2 are 19mths apart (planned). Was worried that DC3 will feel like an only child but am now focussing on the fact that it will be great to have others at school and have time alone with baby. (PS) I live in Wales too..

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