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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

28 weeks and baby not moving as much, confused, breaking down and generally at a loss

16 replies

CaringForPod · 07/02/2011 09:49

Hi,

I just needed to vent on here - had a bad couple of days and off to the day assessment unit later.

Basically, I can't feel the baby moving as much as he has done recently. This morning I completely broke down and my husband phoned the hospital and they told me to go the day assessment unit later today.

I can feel the baby a bit more now, so am feeling a bit of a fraud and like I'm wasting people's time. But I'm still worried and want peace of mind.

Does anyone else ever feel like they just want the baby 'out' so they know he/she is safe? My midwife is being really good with me and has referred me to specialist treatment, but still finding this really hard.

Anyway, sorry to have a brain dump, just needed to get my feelings out.

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CarolinaRua · 07/02/2011 09:51

Maybe keep a journal noting all your movements and this will give you comfort.

Bubandbump · 07/02/2011 09:55

Yes I have had Kung foo baby for the past 7 weeks (am 27 weeks) but it seems to have quietened down this week. I can still feel it kicking away fairly regularly but I too rang the midwife and she wasn't worried.

If I wasn't still having regular movement then I too would be down to the hospital asap - you are no expert and worrying will be doing you no good so you have nothing to feel like a fraud about, get checked and put your mind at rest.

You're not alone in the way you are feeling. I had a conversation on a thread previously where someone said that the only difference when they are out is that you don't need a scan to be able to check on them - I think it may be part of being a parent and caring about something so much!

Bring on 40 weeks is all I can say!!!

Lulumaam · 07/02/2011 09:57

your baby still has lots of room to move in and can kick towards your back for example, so you wouldn't feel as many kicks.

being chekced out if you think movement has decreased is not being silly, it's important for your peace of mind

what specialist treatment have you been referred for? is it anxiety

i understand you just want your baby here and safe, you've done over half the pregnancy, the end is in sight

Original poster

CaringForPod · 07/02/2011 10:02

Thanks Carolina and Bubandbump.

I've been struggling for most of this pregnancy, mentally. I always knew it would be a risk, but it's been so much harder than I ever thought. Like I said, my midwife is excellent but she can't be with me every day. I just worry how I'll cope when the baby is born.

Fingers crossed all will be well at the assessment unit later. I know I shouldn't feel like a fraud, and I'd tell others the same. But I just have this huge guilt complex about wasting people's time.

But as my husband points out, this help is what I pay my taxes for...

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Original poster

CaringForPod · 07/02/2011 10:05

Lulamaan - thanks to you too :-)

I've been referred to a service within our local mental health trust (not a stranger to them, sadly) and am still waiting to hear. In the meantime, I'm having some general counselling, but I find it quite wishy-washy to be honest. The service I'm waiting to see is for depression/anxiety/general mental health issues in parenthood. They monitor you for a year after the birth, which I think I'm really going to need as I've been told quite a lot that I'm at risk of PND.

Thank you again for your kind comments, they really do mean a lot.

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mamadiva · 07/02/2011 10:07

I was in and out of hospital for the last month or 2 of my pregnancy because my DS stopped moving as much but they said it was just because he was getting bigger therefore he could'nt move as much.

Pregnancy is a scary thing even more so when you hear stories about other people etc, but your midwife nd hospital have seen it soo many times before and they will not fuss about it! They are there to help you and I'm sure they will be just as happy as you when you say the baby is now moving more so don't feel like a fraud.

Also FWIW everyone does get bored at thsi stage, you've been waiting for what seems like forever and time will only seem to drag on more before you finally meet your baby but just think of it this way.

Whilst baby is inside you, you can do simple things like read a book in peace, sleep for as long as you like and go out to the shop without taking an hour and a half to prepare for the military operation that is your baby :o I know it's hard but just try to bare these things in mind.

Oh and last thing... when I used to go into hospital for this I was advised to eat ice cream/cubes or ice lollies and to take a bath as for some reason this can provoke them to move, as did my Clubland CD :o

sh77 · 07/02/2011 10:08

I find that my baby goes quiet for a couple of days at a time every few weeks and then licks back into action. I do feel him roll or nudge, which is comforting. But, still worth getting it checked out.

Original poster

CaringForPod · 07/02/2011 10:25

Thanks all, am feeling better about going to the hospital now, just for my sanity.

The problem is that the anxiety/worry is also stopping me from sleeping well. So the tiredness is making me feel worse and more susceptible to worry.

I wish I could just relax, but that's an alien concept to me unfortunately. Even now I'm trying to get on with my freelance work to take my mind off things.

OP posts:

jasmine51 · 07/02/2011 10:44

caring you dont sound like you are wasting anyones time, they wont laugh at you at the DAU and will give you the reassurance you need. Have you considered hiring a doppler? That way you could have a quick tune into bubs heartbeat any time night or day to put your mind at rest.
Also I can recommend some hypnotherapy to give you some techniques to control your anxiety and see the wood for the trees.
Good luck
x

bubbablubber · 07/02/2011 11:24

Caring - I think I saw that you are in Oxford on another thread. I have been struggling too with anxiety and depression about the pregnancy thing and have an appointment with IPPS tomorrow could you give any details of what they are like?

Sorry for hijacking the thread

lilly13 · 07/02/2011 11:47

i am almost 27 weeks and sometimes the baby is very quiet. i do a lot of yoga, and when i do inversions (aka shoulder stand), the baby becomes very active afterwards which quite reassuring... maybe do a few upsidown postures or swing your hips a few times and see what happens?

ImFab · 07/02/2011 12:02

Never worry what any hospital staff think of you. This is your baby and nothing else matters. Go and get checked whenever you want too.

With dc2 I was in the hospital officially getting scanned weekly but I also went in when ever I was worried. I didn't care what the midwives thought even though they were rude.

tlise · 07/02/2011 12:16

I am 30+ 3, Mine has quiet days. She had a few days where it seemed she was never still then the last couple of days she hasn't kicked, but is moving. Sometimes they move without you realising. If its worrying you, keep a chart, I bet baby is moving more than you realise.

I think After hearing on the news about Amanda Holdens baby yesterday, its making all mums worry more, its only natural. Its something thats out of our hands completely and its scary but every mum has the same fears so you're not alone xx

EldritchCleavage · 07/02/2011 13:12

CaringForPod this may sound weird, but have you tried a flotation tank? My sister swore by it for late pregnancy when she couldn't sleep well. She found it very relaxing and almost as refreshing as sleep.

They can't set your mind at rest, but that and things like massage may help a virtuous circle in which you are more physically relaxed, so sleep comes easier, which should in turn help your anxiety a little.

Original poster

CaringForPod · 08/02/2011 08:01

Thanks everyone. The midwife at the DAU was lovely and everything is OK - baby is kicking away but I can't feel most of them due to my anterior placenta. Think he must have changed positions as I felt him a lot more before.

bubbablubber - if you could let me know how it goes with IPPS, that would be great. Midwife referred me to them the week between xmas and new year but not heard anything yet. How long did you have to wait for your appointment, if you don't mind me asking?

And Eldridge - strangely enough, I've actually got a flotation session coming up. There was a deal on for one in Oxford. Good to know it worked for your sister, so fingers crossed.

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FindingStuffToChuckOut · 08/02/2011 11:16

I'm 28 weeks - lots of movements but it can be nerve wracking. Every morning I lie there until I feel the baby more before I get up.

Just remember there are lots of variables affecting movement, or at least your perception of babys movement - position of baby, placenta position (mine in anterior too), babies have lazy days like week do & their movements from day to day can vary wildly. If I recall correctly from last time they then start to move less as they get more cramped.

I was told with DD (by midwife) if I was worried about movement to roll about on my back for a while and then lie on my side and await movement - guess this wakes the baby up if they are asleep??? And gets them moving?? I did it a few times and it worked.

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