I have just took a test and i'm pregnant...

[briefcasewanker]

Someone please come and hold my hand.

DH and I talked at the beginning of December and decided to stop using condoms and just see what happens, we didn't 'try' as such.

Have had a bit of a bad stomach (TMI, sorry) and my boobs felt a bit bigger but i didn't think anything of it really.

I woke up this morning and the first thing that came into my head was 'take a test, take a test, take a test' So i did, and its positive.

I am happy, and DH will be too, but i can't stop shaking. It just dawned on me that i am actually going to have to give birth to this baby

DD's birth 2 years ago was awful, ended up with failed ventouse, forceps and a 3rd degree tear. It took me about a year before i could think of the birth without crying.

Oh my god...

Congratulations - and it's a completely natural feeling.

No two births are the same - remember this. My first was an emergency c-section followed by MRSA infection. The second was a VBAC with long internal tear and 2 blood transfusions. And I'm still going ahead with a 3rd. WHY?!?!!

Talk with your MW about your fears and worries. I am sure you are not alone in a 2nd pregnancy filling you with fear and trepidation. Maybe you didn;t get a chance to fully talk through your first birth and understand why things happened the way they did? xx

Thanks for replying to me captainbarnacle you are right, i was off my tits on gas and air and pethedine for my first birth and don't really know what went on, DD was huge at 9lb 6oz too which didn't help...

They said at my 6 week check that they would offer me a c-section if i got pregnant again, but of course that has risks aswell..

On top of all this, my Mum is getting married on 5th November, baby due at beginning of October... I've already got my bridesmaids dress, Mum will be fine about it but i was looking forward to wearing that dress do you think i could get down to a size 12 again in 4 weeks?

lol maybe a bit too hopeful!!

That's a huge baby. This time you should have consultant care during your pregnancy as well as meetings with a MW - that's what happens here. Even though my last labour was VBAC I still have a consultant appointment for 3 weeks time. The plan for my second labour was to go into labour naturally and aim for a natual delivery. But if I went overdue I would rather have a planned c section than be induced again. So my 2nd labour worked how (roughly) how I wanted!

Hope people take your concerns seriously x

Firstly, congratulations!
Very often, memories of a traumatic delivery are stirred up again by a subsequent pregnancy. It's completely normal to be worried after your last experience. Why don't you tell your GP/midwife that you'd like to meet the obstetrician in charge of your case to discuss your concerns and options for delivery.
Also, google birth trauma and you'll find lots of support and understanding out there as well as on MN.

My 1st delivery was horrendous but I did go on to have 2 more, one by EMCS and the third by ECS. Both those deliveries were better than the first!

Oooh, congratulations (fellow Inbetweeners viewer, I'm guessing from the nickname!).

I had a dreadful birth with DD1, which I took a while to get over. Have since had DDs 2 and 3 (VBACs) and they were totally different experiences. All my babies were between 8 and 9lb, with truly enormous heads, so I can understand your worries, but one difficult borth does not mean the next has to be like that.

I had consultant-led care, which was very helpful but the most helpful thing were good mws. With DD3, I had a discussion with the head of midwifery at my hospital to make sure we got a birth plan I was happy with and the hospital were happy with. (It was the consultant's advice that I talk to her, BTW, as he said that she was by far the best person to know exactly what they could offer me and how to best 'manage' my birth).

Wow congratulations, I felt like this when I fell with my 2nd. Just because you had a bad experience first time doesn't mean it will be bad 2nd time, my first experience was awful (not like yours but traumatic in its own way), but my DD's birth was lovely (painful like but lovely!). As soon as she'd come out I said to my hubby "wow I could do that again" it was so completely the opposite of what I experienced first time and dreaded. No two births or pregnancies are the same.

HTH just wanted to give you a bit of reassurance and hope really! xxx