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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

worried about 6 year age gap

24 replies

flowerfairy71 · 03/01/2011 22:42

after several years of trying and losing along the way, I am now 25 weeks and absolutely thrilled to be having our 2nd baby and finally a sibling for our DS. he will be six this week though and I am worried how this age gap will work as they both get older, not that we have much choice now! anyone have any reassuring words for me of their own experiences with siblings?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

zeus123 · 03/01/2011 22:47

The difference between our DCs is 7.5 years. They play and fight like other children -there are advantages and disadvantages but It is lovely for you and esp your DS to have a sibling.
I will def not worry about it .

Original poster

flowerfairy71 · 03/01/2011 22:53

thanks zeus123 its really good to hear as most people around me have their DCs close together so no one to compare to. i guess there are pros and cons both ways anyway :)

OP posts:

piprabbit · 03/01/2011 22:54

Congratulations FF - so pleased for you.

There is a 7 year age gap between myself and my DSis.

TBH, I don't remember a lot about her when she was small. I don't think I found her especially interesting and was busy doing all my own stuff (School, Brownies, Swimming, Dance, playing with friends etc.).

Then when she hit teenage years I was away at university and I didn't see much of her.

However, I love her to bits and think she is a wonderful, fantastic, life-enhancing person. I'm hugely proud of her and now we are adults we enjoy each other's company and actively seek each other out.

The age gap between your DS and baby will work out. It may be different from a close gap, but that doesn't mean that they will not appreciate each other.

Jas · 03/01/2011 22:57

I have two dds close in age, and ds is 5.6 and almost 7 years younger than them.

I loved the gap when he was tiny - I had baby time during the day while the girls were at school, and he fitted in around already established routines fairly well.

He is now almost 5 and has a normal sibling relationship with themboth. Good and bad depending on the day/mood of each child.

Congratulations!

Original poster

flowerfairy71 · 03/01/2011 22:59

thanks piprabbit, you nearly made me cry!!(doesnt take much at the moment:)) i know it will be ok really, and DS is really excited about the whole thing, its just so nice to hear other people's experiences.

OP posts:

darleneconnor · 03/01/2011 22:59

There's 5 and a bit years between mine and they play together all the time. I think it's a good gap.

winnybella · 03/01/2011 23:02

DS is almost 9 and DD almost 2. In the beginning we went through the whole jealousy thing and DS being annoyed with the baby crawling in his room wrecking havoc, but now he thinks she's the cutest thing in the world and she adores him.

I would prepare myself for perhaps a difficult first year (maybe not, just that it could be) but it should all be fine after.

Congratulations on your pg

MrsRhettButler · 03/01/2011 23:02

no idea but i will have dc2 next yr with a 6 yr age gap too so will watch this thread :)

congratulations :)

ThatVikRinA22 · 03/01/2011 23:03

gap between mine was 6 years. perfect imo! you get to devote all your time to both of them when they are babies, it is like having your first all over again! mine are now 19 and 13, and i think it was just fine. they get on really well most of the time!

Concordia · 03/01/2011 23:04

There's five years between me and my brother and i love him loads! we did lots together as children,the gap was normal for us iykwim

piprabbit · 03/01/2011 23:04

Sorry about that FF.

My DCs age gap is nearly 5 years, and they are just starting to get on and play independently together - that makes me want to cry with happiness at times (one little brown head and one little fair head, bent together as they plot some unspeakable horror).

Blackeyeddog · 03/01/2011 23:07

Congratulations .

My DD is 14 months and adores 7 yr old DS - and he adores her. He does play with her and likes to make her laugh, and I hope they will always have such a special relationship.

Original poster

flowerfairy71 · 03/01/2011 23:11

thanks all - feel much better about the whole thing and now off to bed! good night all :)

OP posts:

cowboylover · 04/01/2011 21:07

Congratulations!

Not from personal as I am an only child but there are 6 years between DH and his brother and they are best friends as in totally inseperable! They are currently snowboarding together and has openly said if he did not live with me and Bro with SIL they would live together!

As an only child I always thought I only would have one as I loved it but they have made me change my mind

Lorna1234 · 04/01/2011 21:25

One more 'it's great' message here! There's 7 years between me and my brother. Works well. I got to play protective older sister growing up. of course there were ups and downs. his use of my makeup as crayons and all that. but we go out clubbing together with friends etc. Now he's chuffed that at the age of 21 he's about to be an uncle. It's a good age gap from my experience :)

jollyma · 04/01/2011 21:35

There is 6 years between my ds's. I wouldn't have chosen a big gap but it has worked out great. Ds1 was not at all envious but did find sharing our attention hard at times iyswim. Ds2 is now 22 months and they are great friends. Ds1 is happy rediscovering brio or cars and is loving having a playmate.

jollyma · 04/01/2011 21:41

Oh, also they do fight occasionally but also take great pleasure ganging up against me which for now is very sweet.

flowerfairy · 04/01/2011 22:49

I'm just reeling from the coincidence FF71. As i'm expecting dc#2 after many years fo trying and there will be 6.11 yrs between my 2. I'm 32 weeks atm and also sligthly fretting about how ds will react when baby arrives. He seems quite excited at the moment and is very fascinated about my changing belly shape. Good luck to you and i'm sure that our dc will learn to adapt to the changes soon enough.

CameronCook · 04/01/2011 22:53

Lovely age gap - lots of different time with both DCs.

Mine love each other to bits - although they fight and argue like any other children.

DD looks up to DS and DS mothers DD

vmcd28 · 04/01/2011 23:04

I have a 7week old ds and a 5y 10m ds. It's great. Older one goes to school, so less to contend with during the day than if they were close in age. And there's a chance to nap during the day as a result. Ds1 is so in love with ds2 and is old enough to understand why a baby needs its mum so much.
Best of luck, and congrats x

jollyma · 05/01/2011 08:53

I was very worried too when pregnant as it seemed like such a life changing thing for ds1. The moment i knew they would get on fine was when ds1 kissed my belly good night as he always did and ds2 kicked him, ds1 welled up with tears of joy and went on to tell everyone about it! He is still very patient and loving except when ds2 breaks his lego models. I do have to remind myself that he is only 8 sometimes, its easy to put too much responsibility on him.

Original poster

flowerfairy71 · 13/01/2011 19:21

thanks once again to you all for really putting my mind at rest.
FF cant believe we have the same name on here and the same situation - spooky! good luck to you and everyone else about to have their DC2 :)

OP posts:

pagwatch · 13/01/2011 19:23

there is 10 years between ds1 and dd, six years between ds2 and dd.
they all get on brilliantly - plus i get a lie in tomorrow as ds1 likes to walk his sister to school once a week.
they talk about stuff

Phlebas · 13/01/2011 20:03

I've got almost 6 years between my first two - it's a fabulous age gap, really easy, great fun, they are very close & play together lots (dd (10y) is always inventing games to amuse ds (4y)). 10,000x easier than the 2 years between ds & dd2.

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