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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

3rd baby!!!

10 replies

binkymum1 · 14/12/2010 15:08

Hello
Any advice to give to a pregnant mum for the 3rd time??

I have 2 daughters already and although we were trying for another baby during the spring/summer we had recently decided that 2 was enough! Have now found out I am pregnant again (although very early), need some advice, I feel so unsure what to do!! I am nearly 39 so I feel age may be an issue, as is my weight! I am really against abortion for contraception purposes but feel that I need to consider it. My parents are not really happy about it as we have lack of space,money etc!!!

Has anyone else been in the same situation?? Could really do with some help as I feel very fearful.

x

OP posts:
oh4goodnesssake · 14/12/2010 15:17

Not really any advice, just to say that I am in a similar position (even older though) and also thought about whether we should keep it or not. Now 17 weeks and it may be the hormones but I'm really pleased and see this baby as a new and exciting adventure for our family. Hope that you make the right decision for you x

Arabella36 · 14/12/2010 15:18

Hello Binky. There is a good counselling service who can allow you to talk through the pros and cons as it's not at all an easy decision. Many aspects to consider. I'm hoping someone else will post with the name of the service as it's gone out of my head. I'm going to try to remember and get back to you.

Best of luck to you.

theevildead2 · 14/12/2010 15:49

If you were actively trying as recently as Spring\summer I suspect you'll regret a termintation. Are you sure you aren't just feeling a bit hormonal? Big fat pregnant hugs to you x

Maternelle · 14/12/2010 16:22

Hi Binky,

I am in the same situation except, we were not trying. Have a DD 4 and a DS 2.5 and they had only 18 months between them which was very hard work.
I keep alternating between broodiness and pure terror.
Good luck.

discobeaver · 14/12/2010 16:25

Like evildead I also think you may regret a termination.

I also have two daughters, and am pregnant with the 3rd baby, I am 41.

It is a very worrying time with so many unknown factors, but like Arabella (love that name but can't use it if the next on eis a girl, stamp stamp stamp!)says, a counselling service will help you talk through your situation.

Good luck whatever you decide x

Original poster
binkymum1 · 14/12/2010 16:34

Thanks for your comments...It's just so confusing. With both other planned pregnancies felt slight worries re the baby but pure happiness and excitement. This time I suppose I just feel a bit empty...and unsure. Will think on it a little more....

OP posts:
Arabella36 · 14/12/2010 18:01

Hi Discobeaver, has your DH banned Arabella from being on your baby-name shortlist LOL? My cousin's husband banned it as being to "frilly"!

On a much more serious note - Binky, maybe try Marie Stopes as a starting point? I think they've got an online abortion counselling guide to help you start to think things through.

Don't rush into your decision either way, you need time to think.

thatsnotmynipple · 14/12/2010 18:06

I have two daughters and really want a third one day.

I think if you were trying then you probably do want this baby? What will you regret more, not having it or having it?

Do NOT worry about what your parents say - you don't need anybody else's permission to have this baby.

Good luck Smile

jellyhead188 · 14/12/2010 18:22

I think its totally normal to worry about a 3rd, I am currently pg with my 3rd (very much planned) but after having 2 m/c and PND after my 2nd I alternate between sheer terror and joy. When I found out I was pg again, I freaked out (prob due to the m/c) - with your 3rd you know what to expect, you know how hard it can be but I think you can focus on the negatives and not on the postives of having another child. There is a crisis center I know of called Directions, you could give them a ring they will talk you through things.

StrangewaysHereICome · 14/12/2010 20:12

Does your DH know you are pg - how does he feel?

I agree with what others have said in that if you were trying earlier in the year, you might regret a termination. You are probably in shock atm and focussing on how your life will change.

I am pg with my third and I have to say that the giddy excitement I had with the first two is not as strong as my practical head is making me focus on the practicalities. I wonder how a third child will change the family dynamic. As Jelly says you very much know what to expect so it can be difficult to focus on the positives. The initial upheaval of a new baby will be temporary.

You need to talk to someone and I really hope you can make a decision that you and your DH are happy with. Best of luck.

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