terrified about 20 week scan

[bettywobble]

I really am PETRIFIED about my 20 week scan, which is actually in 2 weeks so I will be 22 weeks. I guess I?m just worrying about everything because of all the other times (7 mc although all before 8 weeks), and I suppose I?m a worrying type person, but I am so scared that it?s really stopping me from enjoying this pregnancy. I am scared they will find something really wrong, and I feel like I can?t relax until its been done. It?s not helping either that I have an anterior placenta, meaning I feel very few kicks/movement (I have felt them since 13 weeks but they are very sporadic, depending on which way baby is lying). I also feel that this pregnancy is so medicalised, like it was last time with ds, and it?s scaring me with all the medical talk and all that stuff?sometimes I wish I could just be left to get on with it and let my body do what it knows. I suppose I am just feeling down about it all today :( but thanks for reading

I have mine tomorrow and even with no prior problems and this being DC1 I had an attack of the panics yesterday! It doesn't help that they continually refer to it as the 'anomaly scan', it makes it sound horrible instead of exciting.

I'm fast learning that raised anxiety levels are the norm, I'm normally quite chilled out and have panicked about all sorts of random things.

Have you explained your worries and fears to your antenatal department? They may not help but it's got to be worth a shot.

You've obviously had 'bad news' scans - as I have. It's impossible to relax about them - just need to get them over asap. Can you not bring it forward?

Hope all goes well.

They wont let me bring it forward at all, but it seems ages to wait til 22 weeks. My bad news scans have all been about 6-8 weeks, and I HATE them. Everyone seems to just be bothered about "am I haing a boy or girl" and all I care about is getting it over and done with and that my baby is ok!

So sorry you're feeling so bad bettywobble, I'm feeling mainly dread/worry about my 20 week scan too (on Monday). Lots of people have asked me about the sex/whether I'm excited to be finding out the sex but mainly I am just dreading finding something wrong. Sounds so negative I know but it's really difficult to get out of that frame of mind.

Like you I've also got an anterior placenta so not really feeling any movement. Ocassionally I think I feel a twitch and then nothing at all for a week or so. It's made worse by the fact I'm sure I felt quite clear movements around 14 weeks, but nothing since, though I heard the heartbeat at a MW appointment at 16 weeks.

I wondered if I could feel them earlier because the placenta would have been smaller and if I might be feeling less now as the placenta has got bigger? Just a theory but might be same for you if your movements are sporadic?

Anyway, sorry to have been so negative just wanted to let you know you're not alone :) Being realistic, the chances are it's all fine, and even if they do find a problem, there are so many things that can be fixed. Best of luck to you bettywobble

Good Luck for tomorrow cyclebump :)

It always frustrates me too when people put all the emphasis on finding out the gender at these scans. Ugh! Like you I have had my fair share of bad scans and find it hard to relate to people whose sole concern is the gender and what colour their nursery will be. Mine is just over a month away.

Most people's scans are perfectly fine at 20 weeks and if anything is picked up, it's usually soft markers which in and of themselves are not serious. It's really rare to get super bad news.

I hope the next few weeks pass quickly for you!

Cyclebump - good luck to you too!

I have my 20 week can a week Friday - I'm terrified too. I'm really sorry that you and ajandjjmum had 'bad news' scans. This is my first DC so I haven't but I am getting so wound up thinking about it. I'm 18+6 and am not sure I have even felt any movements (!) and am panicking dreadfully about that.

Its not just you and I'm glad to know its not just me.

Keeping my fingers crossed for all

littlemiss 18 weeks is still very early for feeling movements with a first.. some people don't feel them until 23-24 weeks so don't worry!

I had mine today at 21 weeks, was very nervous, didnt sleep at all last night and was laying awake at silly oclock this morning. Every thing was fine tho thank god. Try to think positive and enjoy it x

I am a gibbering wreck the days before a scan - even with my very first one before I had experienced any bad scans!

am now 18wks & have had one "flutter" so far - I went to see my MW yesterday to listen to the HB in the hope that that would help calm my nerves. My 20wk scan is at 21wks - very annoying to be late, but I keep telling myself it means there is a shorter gap between this scan and the next!

Do you use any relaxation techniques? Acupuncture/Reflexology/Yoga/Meditation? I listened to some (free) guided meditation off iTunes when pg with DD which helped - I will be digging those out again soon.

littlemiss - don't worry, I didn't feel anything with DD until after 20wks

Hello again, am just back from mine and I have to have another one in two weeks as baby point blank refused to co-operate. Most things were fine but they couldn't check the blood flow to the heart and baby kept hands over chest at all three attempts.

Feel better though as they managed to check everything else!

Good news cyclebump :) At least they managed to check everything else and you get to see your baby again!

Am glad to have another peek so soon. Just wish baby wasn't so naughty though. After the worry and stress I just wanted it to go smoothly.

I hate the lead up to the scans. Got my dating scan on monday and i'm terrified for some reason.

Think it's guilt related anxiety because when I peed on the pregnancy test I was so sure it would be negative and when it wasn't I googled abortions. Changed my mind and this baby is as wanted as much as it's big sister was and still is. But I can't stop worrying now incase something is wrong with it and it'll all be my fault.

B-W
have you thought about NOT having a scan? In your situation it seems that it's not going to reassure you much. You're feeling your little baby kick and move, so you could just leave it at that, and just go along to your regular midwife appointments.

Just a thought! (from someone who did ALL the scans/ tests in 2 pregnancies, and none in third!)

I was thinking that, but then I was also thinking what if they see something which could easily be treated or whatever, and I hadn't gone??? I think no matter what happens I am going to worry. Last time I saw a mw I was only just 16 weeks, so maybe I'm just extra nervous coz everyone else is seeing someone etc around this time, and I'm just basically sitting waiting around another fortnight extra!

Ooh Saffy! My first reaction was to shout 'F*ck!' in shock and then to think 'What have we done!'

I reckon it's a hormone thing as, like yours, this baby is so wanted. My pregnancy book says even people who have been IVFing for ages etc often register their first emotion as horrified shock because of the surge of adrenaline. Is totally normal.