Can I refuse to see a midwife and consultant?

[UpDuffWithoutPaddle]

I have PTSD related to hospitals and I'm newly pregnant with DC2.

I'll be classified as superextramega high risk due to existing medical problems. But last time all the obstetric appointments made me feel so much worse - and I was forced to have men in the delivery room. Even having an indepedent midwife and trying for a homebirth didn't help.

Can I refuse it all and just give birth privately in a deserted field?

Has anyone tried it?

Or would Social Services try and intervene?

:) Sorry, didn't mean to make you feel bad. Look after yourself and your little one. :)

It would be great if your GP was on your side. I will keep my fingers crossed you find an ally there and with an IM you have faith in.

Also, some of the other posters have mentioned how important it is for your DC to have good care, but remember that it is also crucial to your DC that you survive too. I really really hope you can find ways to manage your PTSD and your fear, but remember both your children need you to be alive and healthy and if you are high risk for whatever reason, don't take risks with your health either.

Wishing you lots of luck and a healthy happy pregnancy and child birth.

When I met the midwife, I explained that I didn't really want to do the booking in and see her until I had had had a CVS in London,at 12 weeks. I am an older mother and was worried about the results and didn't want to get too excited at that stage. She threaten me with social services telling me that I would not be looking after the baby if I didn't see her. The fact that I was going to the top person in the world for fetal medicine and I would be seeing the normal hospital consultant as well didn't seem to get through to her. In the end I spoke to the midwifery team and they arranged for me to see a different midwife, after I had had the CVS. All alright with the baby and I now have a very nice midwife who is down to earth and normal!

P.s. I understand your issues with your first birth as I had two EM CS, the first being particularly difficult. I think that professional sometimes forget that these experiences stay with you for a long time.

Bless you, I hope you are well.
I have nightmares every night since the birth of my little boy in August. I cannot even step on hospital property without shaking. I waited 17 years for my little man, even now I'd love a brother or sister for him but there is no way I'd go near a hospital again. Not going into too much details Birth induced, strapped to monitors everything I had written that I didn't want. Then given an epidural that went wrong, not catheterised, tore badly anesthetic wore off before they finished stitching. Muppets couldn't get blood (amateurs!) and I was screaming for them to leave me. They then kept me in for five days (I don't do being trapped). All this was because they said I had PIH, their actions made everything one hundred times worse. They put me in a side ward eventually because I wanted to discharge us, that was the same place I was when I lost my daughter 13 years ago. I wouldn't sleep because every time I woke I wished that I had died. Thankyou for helping people know they have a choice because I for one will NEVER let them manipulate me again and I will NEVER AGAIN LET THEM TAKE CONTROL!!!

Once again bless you honey, sending you heaps of love. xxxxx

Go you! Stick up for yourself! Your experience seems quite horrible and I have heard of many cases like it - you are not alone.

You can give birth alone and in nature, just take yourself there and do it but make sure you are confident with doing so. Of course, 'legally' you will have to state that it wasn't 'planned' - this is in case you upset some dick with a big pay packet. Its the natural order of things and a natural right.

A year old