1st trimester problems

[argylesocks]

Hi first timer (and unexpected) here so please excuse the panicked sounding posts.

I dont have any friends with kids so my resources are limited.

I'm in the torturous wait for my first doc appointment so i feel really on my own.

Is it generally safe to assume that if something goes wrong, you'll know it? Of course there are always exceptions but it would just mean a lot less worry that if nothing seems to have gone wrong so far, no bleeding, no real pain (just some mild cramps), that all is ok? Seems like a silly question but there's so much mixed info out there...

Unfortunately no. You can have a missed miscarriage where nothing happens and where your body still gets pregnancy symptoms as these are produced by the hormones from the developing placenta, not the developing baby.

But only about 20% of pregnancies are miscarried after you've had a positive test, and of those, missed miscarriages with zero symptoms are a relatively small proportion.

So the odds are in favour of everything being fine, but you won't find out until the first scan.

I wondered the same thing all the way through my first trimester and was on the internet constantly trying to work out whether I would know if something wasn't right... so I 'think' that this is totally normal!

Generally speaking, you would know if something was wrong. Mild cramps are fine (mine felt a lot like period pains and I also had stomach cramps higher up) and I got told that as long as they aren't accompanied by bleeding, not to worry.

Dont expect too much from your first doctor appointment - I was so upset when I didnt get an over-excited reaction from my doctor and she was completely matter-of-fact about everything. Your booking in appointment at around 10-12 weeks will be more what you are expecting and you will discuss everything in more detail.

I was told that it is rare for something to be wrong without you knowing about it, so try not to stress too much. Easier said than done, I know, but try to distract yourself and if you are really concerned, and can afford it, you could have a private scan just to check...

Good luck!

Hi argylesocks
Congratulations on your pregnancy! How many weeks are you?

I think there is lots of mixed info out there because there are lots of things that vary from woman to woman. The majority of the time if something has gone wrong your body will reject the pregnancy and you'll have cramps/bleeding etc - sadly occasionally your body doesn't reject the pregnancy even though the pregnancy has effectively ended However This the risk of this is low 1% of all pregnancies
www.womens-health.co.uk/miscarriage/missed.html

I worked myself into a complete lather worrying about it, and I think it's really important to bear in mind that chances are everything is fine! :) Miscarriage statistics are all over the internet and it's very easy to get focussed on the things that go wrong, but statistically 75% of pregnancies are sucessful. Which is pretty good odds!

I was in a similar situation to you, as I didn't really want to tell anyone the news until past the 12 weeks so obviously there are fewer people to ask for help. Mumsnet has been an absolutely winderful place to come for help/advice - full of very knowledgable and helpful mums and mums to be!

And mild cramping is normal! I'm 15 weeks and still get a fair bit of period pain like cramps and I think it's especially common in the early weeks.

Good luck with your pregnancy, I know it's almost impossible not to worry (biggest pregnancy symptom there is I think!) how long do you have until your first appt?

I was exactly the same and I have joined the threads for my due date and the May ladies have treated me so well and nice to be able to share all those wierd "is this normail/supposed to be happening?" feelings and then I was reasured to see I was not alone with many having a similar expreiences.

I went to see my MW and she banned me from googling anything pregnancy related as she said there is so much unfounded contradictary information out there its best not to!

Mild cramps are okay - your uteris is stretching to make room for the fetus. You would no if something was not ok. Try to relax and enjoy this! Congratulations!

Afraid a friend of mine only found out she had miscarried at her 12 week scan. She had had no symptoms. (BTW she later went on to have a completely normal pregnancy and lovely DD2 after the miscarriage). However, conversely you might well get symptoms with a miscarriage.

Totally agree with others that there's nothing you can do about it (well, apart from the obvious don't get drunk, try to quit smoking etc etc) and you just have to try to get to the 12 week scan. Which chances are will be fine.

The fact that you've had no signs of anything wrong is definitely good though! (agree mild cramps are totally normal - I got stitches low in my abdomen with DD in the first and second trimesters).

thanks. I'm 8 weeks now and the earliest they would give me an appointment isn't for another 6 weeks! I might call and see if they have any openings earlier because i think its just cruel to make me wait so long.

My symptoms come and go so some days I feel awful, others I feel fine and wonder if I'm still even pregnant!

I know there's nothing I can do but wait and it's nice to know that it's most likely fine... but it's just a horrible feeling not knowing.

Hi argylesocks and congrats!

It may give you some reassurance to come and join the due June 2011 thread - if you are due in June of course - there are lots of us "nervous nellies" and first timers there, experiencing the same anxieties as you. if not, there is a due May thread somewhere and I'm sure they are just as lovely!

thanks I'll join right now :)

argylesocks I was in a similar position to you. I totally convinced myself that I wasnt pregnant and that I had imagined it. I saw from posts on here about women having Missed MC and panicked that that would be me.

I had awful cramping in the early days, actually though it was my period coming.

Went for my scan a week ago and im having twins

shocked to say the least anyway...I think what you are worrying about is totally normal. I still worry every now and then anyway...

I am aure you will be fine. But you should deffinatly just try to relax (easier said than done I know!).

Have u met with a midwife yet? Maybe talk to her about your fears..or your doctor? good luck.

My symptoms came and went too - some days I'd feel awful then feel absolutely fine for a week and be convinced it had all gone wrong. I went for a private scan at nine weeks just for reassurance that there was something going on. If you have the finances to be able to do it, it's money very well spent. If you google 'reassurance scan' and your area you'll find somewhere that can do it. We went to babybond who are a national company and they were very good (cost £100)