feel fat and frumpy and I'm only 14 weeks!!!!

[bettywobble]

Anyone else feeling like me? I'm 29 and feel like I'm 69, and I'm only 14 and a half weeks gone! It may have a lot to do with the fact that this pregnancy was a TOTAL shock (ds is 7). I have put on loads of weight already, I am covered in spots, I cant stop eating, nothing fits, I fall asleep at 8pm, I am the most pleassant person ever....need I go on?!! I dont know any pregnant people that I can relate to, and I seem to be surrounded by sexy, beautiful females!
Has anyone got any advice for making myself feel like a sexy woman again, rather than a human blimp??!!!!

two weeks! Honestly I felt exactly like that at 14 weeks and then at 16 the bump started to show it's self instead of me looking fat.
Oh and the other thing is i've started wearing make up again. Not much but my go to Benefit products:
ooh la lift ( for under eye bags i swear it knocks ten years off)
tinted moisturiser, perfect ten blush (as it highlights and low light making me look like i have great check bones),
Born Ready Lipstick
A brown black mascara (not an turbo massive flash lash one just a normal one from maybeline I think).

I know i'm meant to be glowing with pregnancy hormones but this seams to help.
But really I think the time thing soon you?ll have a lovely tummy to stroke and feel much better about yourself.

Ahh Bettywobble I'm 14 and a half weeks too and know what you mean, I still feel knackered all the time and feel really sorry for DP who is probably wondering where his gf has gone instead of this old lady who just wants to eat, bath and go to bed as early as possible (and SLEEP!)

I'm hoping it will pass - my hormones have been all over the shop since being pregnant. What about going for a beauty treat or getting your hair done? I always feel 100 times better when I've been to the hairdressers.. rare though that is!

OP, that sounds exactly like me at 6-16 weeks! I was so ill at one point that DH was convinced this would be our first and last baby! I couldn't stop eating and I was chubby, bloated with water retention, knackered, spotty and fed up.

After week 16, the tiredness started to lift (it didn't magically go all of a sudden, like it does for some people) and now I'm 23 weeks and loving showing off my bump in tight frocks! It does help that, since the baby's growing up more than out, I can't eat much (no room!), so I've lost a lot of the fat I put on and the water retention has calmed down too (drink plenty of water - it really does help).

What also helped was going shopping for some flattering maternity clothes, so that I wasn't looking fat in my old clothes. H&M, Gap and New Look all do lovely maternity stuff (although ring ahead to check as not all branches stock it) and aren't too expensive.

I also got a new haircut that didn't make me feel as 'mumsy' and started taking care of my hair and make up again.

Hope that helps!

Can I join the fat and frumpy club please!!

I am fed up wearing leggings already!! None of my normal jeans fit and the maternity ones I bought at 6 inches too long and I haven't had the time, nor the inclination to get the sewing machine out to fix them. No where does petite maternity clothes, they must think short arses don't have babies!!! Anyone have any suggestions answers on a postcard please!!

I've also had to stop wearing my contacts as my eyes are really dry! My skin has broken out in what can only be described are teanage acne and I've started getting pelvic pain that makes me waddle :)

I'm only 13 weeks! How many more to go!!

Wouldn't be anything else right now though!

Oooh I had raging acne in my first trimester! I looked AWFUL!

Now at 35 weeks I just look massive and basically like Waynetta Slob. I am currently wearing a really fetching grey tracksuit with my hair ripped back in a top knot with bad roots (going to hairdressers next week and I hope to be transformed).

I am majorly frumpy at the moment and I used to be so into my clothes and make up. I just feel like such a heffalump that I can't be bothered as what's the point??

I see pretty lithe young girls on the street and can't compare! It's crazy and it shouldn't matter, but I feel deeply unattractive at the moment.

Skulks off to open another packet of biscuits...

I am 11 weeks and the same!

I have 4 outfits that are in constant rotation so it doesnt help that I feel the same all the time and my make up irritates me so I am going to buy some new clothes this weekend and take my DH out for a treat for putting up with me.

Its sad that im in my PJs all the time. There are 3 other pregnant girls in my office who all seam to be looking good and nice normal people still where as I feel like shit and and especially grumpy to the people who I like and are nice to me where as the bitches just make me cry in the toilets!

I hope everyone feels better soon x

I feel so frumpy it's untrue. Am 14 weeks on Sunday. All my clothes are too tight around the waist and boobs but I'm not anywhere near maternity clothes territory yet. I have two dresses that I wear in constant rotation with tights and boots but now the tights are starting to dig in and make me look about five months pregnant. My skin is constantly spotty, I have massive bags under my eyes even thought I get loads of sleep. I'm pale and flabby around the middle. I will never ever by slim and attractive again. EVER.
Also my hair is greasy as I got up to late to wash it before work.

Feel better for a rant!

Oh I looked awful first trimester with this pregnancy - bloated, grey skin with dreadful spots and so greasy that I had to wash my hair every day. Huge bags under my eyes - I disgusted myself.

I'm now 17 weeks - bump has properly popped, less grease and the bloat has gone. My skin has really cleared up and my face looks slim rather than puffy.

JoEW and others with clothing problems - get some maternity leggings in a size smaller than your normal to wear under dresses and long tops. You will look, and feel, about 10 million times better.

Urgh I know your pain. I am almost 25 weeks and I am just a big fat lump. I have been eating rubbish because of constant nausea (yes still) and although it is obvious I am pregnant I still have a dip in the middle where my "waist" is and a lovely blobby roll of fat at the bottom of my bump.

I look better standing up, sitting down I look horrid. I am desperately trying to cut back on the bad foods and eat better, but I am often defeated.

My skin is ok, but my hair has loads of grey in it and I am reluctant to dye it (have no money for hairdressers) in case it goes a weird colour. And the final insult is that no shops near me carry a maternity range, so I am bursting out of my trousers and need to urgently order stuff online. Arghhhhh!

I'm at that horrid point where clothes feel too tight, I feel knackered (2nd trimester energy? Ha!), bloat easily, get nauseous still and my hair/skin is terrible....

But I'm not into maternity territory and there's no sodding bump! Nor any sign of one. Just my waist has disappeared and my tummy looks a bit puffy.

Hi Bettywobble and all. Can I join the moan? I've been feeling so frumpy that it's been getting into my dreams so it feels like there's no respite... most recent dream DH and I were chatting to his ex (who neither of us have seen for years), and she was super glamorous, witty, interesting and attractive, whereas I was a fat, boring wallflower :(

I'm spotty too but think it might be easing slightly (i'm in my 12th week), got a bit of a bump but always had a rounded tum so just accentuates that, very tired, still sickly (though that's easing too) and now started with hip pain etc.

Getting married in December when i'll be 21 weeks so I suppose the fear of waddling down the aisle isn't helping. Can't get motivated to do wedding stuff either. Just wanted one day when i'd look like a princess for my DH with photos to last as I sag and wrinkle but i've blown that now! Will bear in mind advice given so far. Any more cheer up tips would be gratefully received :)

Hi. I felt like this too a while ago (am now 26 weeks). Things picked up when I started getting into maternity clothes properly as things fitted and stopped feeling tight which I think makes you feel frumpy. I have bought a lot off Ebay and had to have the trousers shortened as there is very little in petite lengths (apart from DPs) in the shops. I also did a big Next order and got some flattering things after saving up which made me feel better.

When I was 8/9 weeks I started power walking every other day (basically fast walking which makes you out of breath - not that silly bottom wiggling thing!). I started at 12 minutes in total and am now up to 30. It's free (you just need a decent pair of trainers) and I have found it has really helped me feel loads better in terms of flexibility and less guilty that when I eat a muffin or other less healthy food I am at least doing some exercise. I know it sounds like hard work and some days I've really had to make myself go out, but increasing by a minute every time to get to 30 mins has been my goal (or some weeks just sticking at the same speed).

Now I find I get a bit of a pain in my side so I have slowed the pace, but am still going.

I just wanted to say that although I've had my bad days (outbreak of terrible dermatitis which needed 4 weeks of antibiotics!), it is possible to do little things which can help, especially if you have a goal! I really would recommend the walking!!!

I'm 19 weeks and feeling very fat and frumpy at the moment. I think it will help once I get some proper maternity clothes rather than cramming myself into my pre-pregnancy stuff.

I'm 12 weeks and feel the same. It doesn't help that my lovely friend keeps telling me how fat I'm getting!:(
I think I'm going to start swimming at the weekends ( I would be too tired to go during the week after work). I'm hoping it will make me feel better about myself.
I have found that my maternity clothes make me feel more like i'm 'blooming' but squeezing into my everyday clothes makes me feel like a frump :)

Ladies! Stop squeezing into your normal clothes! Nothing will make you feel fatter. Get some maternity clothes that you'll grow into - lots of them look fine from 10-12 weeks on and certainly more flattering than things that are too tight for you.

And Tinwe, get your wedding dress altered to flatter your bump, not hide it. Now that I'm not feeling like warmed over shit and my bump is out properly, I'm wearing clingy dresses and feeling v sexy! My DH loves how I look now - he thinks it's womanly - and really responds to hwo I love my bump. I was boogying at a party last night and getting hit on by loads of guys - which was weird - and lots of compliments from my lesbian friends.

So, you're probably thinking 'shut up, you smug cow!' so I'll stop, but I'm just saying that I felt so awful, fat, washed out and unsexy for the first 16-17 weeks and it can get better - not for everyone, so don't be hard on yourself if you are ill all the way through, some women are - but it usually does get better!

Oh, and get measured for new bras regularly - John Lewis do a fantastic fitting service and you need the support as most of the damage to your boobs is done during pregnancy, not BFing, and a well fitting bra can minimize the drooping. You will probably have to wear scary mum-bras until after the pregnancy (esp if you've gone from a B to an FF cup, like me), but you'll get used to them...

Diamondback - lucky you going from B to FF cup! No boob fairly for me - still tiny boobs which has been challenging as a lot of maternity tops are rather generous!

pushmepullyou - yes from near Holmfirth - I too am astonished to find another MN'er from round here! Are you doing NCT or anything?

Oh girls! I'm 12 weeks and feel huge! The last couple of times I've been in public, I actually ended up opening my jeans button while sitting down. I tried some normal jeans this weekend and found I'd gone up two sizes; I couldn't stop crying in the middle of the store.

Thanks for all the valuable advice here, girls. And enjoy your pregnancies, everyone :)

WestYorkshireGirl I am in Holmfirth - even smaller world! Haven't got round to NCT or anything so far, was wondering whether to sign up. I have a toddler already but didn't join anything last time as I was working right up to my due date and didn't really have time, but have regretted it a bit as it means I don't know any local mums.

I have tried an amazing pair of jeans today and bought them - Noppies 'Bangkok'. They aren't cheap, but I felt really good in them. I bought some Next ones which go over bump, but they fall down constantly! I also bought a very bump hugging dress so it's all down to fit.
Save up and get some nice clothes and you'll feel loads better!

Pushmepullyou The Holme Valley NCT class starts tomorrow night and is apparently full. As this is my first, I thought I could do with all the help I could get! If you ever fancy meeting up I'm in Holmfirth quite a bit (I live in Brockholes) - just let me know. I don't know how to contact you out of the thread?

I've got to agree - switching from my normal jeans (with the buttons open, held together with a hair elastic) to a pair of maternity jeans made all the difference to me.

At £22 they were cheaper than 'normal' jeans and I felt much better.

I found a great website that does some lovely maternity clothes, at not bad prices. www.heavenlybump.co.uk, have a look & they do free returns if things don't fit.

I felt like this last week and went to try on some maternity clothes. Felt lumpy and horrible, then I put on the 'baby cushion' and I was transformed! I felt attractive again - not fat and shapeless, but nicely pregnant. Doesn't help my current look (11 weeks), but at least I have been reminded that I do pregnancy bumps pretty well!

Can I join in the rant too please. Feeling fat and frumpy at 9+6 dispite putting no weight on yet. All my trousers are tight around the middle, might have to go on a shopping spree, if i can summon up the energy, but don't know whether to buy a size up or try maternity clothes already. (Its my first)

DH is generally being very supportive but i'm so tired when he gets home from work I do feel as though i'm neglecting him a bit. Last night I only made it half way through tea before the nausea took over and I retired to bed.

Thanks for listening.

Well I'm only just 7 weeks and even though my partner thinks it's great, to be told lovingly "aah, look you have got a baby belly already" made me quite paranoid. I scrunched my cardigan closed and felt like crying. 7 weeks is nothing, and the last two I'm sure I didn't show anything like this early. I think it's because of my age (41) which doesn't help.

My hair looks nice though, had it cut yesterday

I can so relate to these posts. Am nearly 30 weeks now but was showing by 8 weeks, out of all my clothes bar a few skirts and one pair of trousers by 12 weeks. I felt really down about my body shape until about 25 weeks.

I'd definately recommend:

• A good haircut which always makes you feel great
• A good pair of two of maternity jeans / trousers. There are some realy trendy maternity jeans that are skinny.
• A bump band - get these from mamanjobebe (think that's what its caled, they also do some nice trendy mat clothes too) or two cheapy bump bands in mataland maternity. You wear these under your ordinary clothes as you get bigger - gives bump a bit of support, looks like layering but means you can wear ordinary clothes for longer.

I'd never been able to put weight on and was a little low on my bmi so having putting on a stone and a half was a real culture shock for me, and I felt completely unsure as to what my body would do next.

I did feel like a sack of potatoes for some time, having always worn fitted or tailored clothes but am now wearing more fitted jersey tops etc and trying to proudly show off my bump.

Its difficult around the end of first trimester and until later into second trimenster as you feel bigger but don't necessarily have a obvious baby bump, however it will come.

Partners sometimes make belly comments - they often don't know what to say so they make a joke. I found it most helpful to say to my husband that I felt ugly and frumpy and unprepared for the body changes. when I cried i think he got it.

I also found going to aqua natal classes helpful as I realsied pregnant woemn come in all shapes and sizes and its all perfectly normal. A nice massage is always a good way to feel better about your body too.
There are also style consultants who will help you shop for your new shape. i'm seeing naomi from www.matchuconsultancy.com for this reason tomorrow.