How do you cope with work and other DCs in early pregnancy?

[Caz10]

I've been trawling through threads on morning sickness etc and there is lots of advice re resting, doing things slowly etc etc - what do you do when this is not an option?!? Am only a few weeks into pg2 and already wondering how I will cope, I work 4 days, have an almost 3yrs old and my job requires evening and weekend work too. I am knackered! Had my 1st really bad ms this am, had been feeling queasy till now but can cope with that, but today it was the kind where you're just lying on the floor shivering etc. I was really busy with work yesterday and had a late night and I'm sure it's connected. Can cope with feeling rough and tired, but feeling a bit panicky about being rendered completely incapable - any advice?!

I work full time, am 23 weeks now with DC2, and have 16 mth DS. In first trimester, was shattered all the time - dealing with DS's occasional night-time wake-ups, plus going through really busy phase at work (evening work etc) - and didn't tell anyone at work until I was 4 mths and didn't take any sick days. Luckily I had no nausea this time around. Just tried to get to bed as early as I possibly could every evening (by 9pm or as soon as possible after DS asleep), and on weekends, DH takes DS out for several hours in the mornings so I could go back to sleep for a couple of hours. Just get as much sleep as possible, and get as much help from your OH or family on weekends/time off so you can rest up. The good thing is it passes, and by 2nd trimester I felt much more energetic. Good luck - and it will pass!

I work part-time but weekends and nights are involved. I have 5 year old and 2 year old. I have been as sick as a dog with this pregnancy, am now 20 weeks and finally it has started to subside. I agree I was so much sicker when I was tired, sleep when you can, don't worry if you feel you are neglecting or being a bad mummy to your 3 year old, make "easy dinners", get help with shopping etc, go to bed when 3 year old does or if you're working try and sleep later in the day. Good luck.

If it helps the only place I haven't actually been sick in was work!!!

Hi, I'm in a very similar situation - I work 4 days a week and have a 2 1/2 yr old daughter. I'm now 18 wks so ms is starting to subside but I was really poorly with it. I basically did no housework (hubby did it all), when my daughter napped on my days off/weekends I went to bed too, and I got into bed every night around 8pm. Not glamourous or great but I found that if I was less tired, I felt less sick. It seemed to be linked together for me. Hope you feel better soon.

Oh I feel for you. I'm 28 weeks, have 2.5 year old and work 4 days a week. I was shattered early on with MS, just used to collapse into bed after reading DD bedtime story and sleep for a couple of hours. DH would wake me up to see if I could manage dinner then I'd go back to sleep. He let me lie in at weekends, took DD out as well so I could rest.

By about 14 weeks MS wore off and at about 18 weeks I had a lot more energy, although have been suffering from SPD and getting a bit tired again now.

Go to bed as early as possible - even at 7, get as much help as poss from partner and family/friends and it will pass. And bugger the housework.

Oh you poor thing. I'm 15 weeks with my first, but when I was in that pre-12 week stage and having MS for most of the day every day, I did wonder how people with kids cope! I work full-time, but at least I could go home and vege for the evening.

I definitely agree that stress / over-doing things made a big difference with the MS. Do try to spend as much time as possible on you. Baths in the evening are great. You probably feel like you don't have any right to cut down on your responsibilities because you don't look pregnant yet - but do try to accept that your body just can't do what it used to be able to do, and try to cut down on work shifts if at all possible. In a couple of weeks you can pick more up again! I'm sure you won't be completely incapacitated by this, but no harm in giving yourself a bit of a break.

But I would echo what the others say - it is so rubbish, but it really will be over soon (no matter how much it feels like eternity, now).

Thank you for your kind words! I think I've been in a bit of a blind panic today when I realised how bad it was possible to feel with ms, could hardly pick myself up off the ground this morning.

The housework has already gone to pot ! But it is the early nights that are an impossibility and I am already feeling the strain...dd goes to bed around 8:30, I spend a little time getting clothes ready for the am etc then my time for starting work is normally around 9pm, bed at 11 at the earliest. The work is unavoidable, but at least it is mainly only on the 4 nights before the days that I work iyswim. Desparate for bed right now but need to go and work...zzz....

Glad to hear people are feeling better though - I improved at 16wks with dd, hoping for the same if not earlier!

Hi Caz10

I too am only early days, 6 and a half weeks, and feeling pretty crap tbh. I have a 2.5 year old, who doesnt like to stay in the house, and wants to be out and about constantly, as well as a very responsible demanding part time job, where if I make a mistake its serious so I have to be on the ball, and Im frequently oncall too.

I just want to go to somewhere hot (Im getting shivers along with the nausea too), with no smells or any demands on me to even move until its all over.

Could your DD go to bed a bit earlier perhaps? My DD has been going to bed a lot earlier since MS has struck I also get mine and DD's clothes ready and anything else while she is in the bath.

Dont feel bad going off sick either, just to catch up on resting, and if you feel really rough. Sometimes its very hard to handle the pace of work if your feeling poorly..

I hope you feel better soon, much sympathy!

Ooooh I feel for you - I wasn't back at work but felt rough arse from 11am until 7pm most days while trying to look after 11 month old with DH away with work Mon-Friday.

The only additional thing I can add to the other posts is that what helped me mentally cope with it was thinking "if I can get through feeling awful now while still managing to look after DD, then I WILL be able to cope with looking after a new baby, an 18 month year old and having no sleep" - sounds a bit odd I know but it helped me realise that I had the mental strength to get through the first 12 weeks of pregnancy.

I know some people still suffer after 12 weeks but honestly just when I thought I couldn't cope with the nausea any longer, it went away - just hang on in there and keep nibbling the Rich Tea biscuits.

Oh I had forgotten about rich tea!! If I had the energy I'd be at the shops now

I have read many people on here saying pregnancy with a toddler is harder than a newborn with a toddler - I hope so! Although at least just now I am getting some sleep at night...eek!

HI Caz10, I had the shivering MS too - I found sparkling water, wine gums and a really nice organic apple juice ironically called PIP helped - I just had lots of sips during the day and it helped. good luck

Thank goodness for this thread! I'm really struggling and tired of hearing myself complain so it's a relief to know I'm not alone.

I'm about 8wks, have 2 dc (2.4 and 3.7), work 3 days a week and the nausea and exhaustion are wiping me out. DD2 still wakes a lot in the night and only wants me She also had a fever last night after I went to bed at 8pm, ended up staying with her for hours, falling asleep on the floor next to her bed after checking her temp as she slept.... Gah.

Glad to hear it gets better too as currently I have no ideas how I can manage to get through another week after a day like today.

When I found out I was pg with DD, Ds was just 6 months old and I was working 3 days a week. My ms was terrible in that I felt nauseous ALL. DAY.

My work were not very flexible so I just had to get on with it really, and DH helped out a lot.

This time around, my MS was the worst of all, every morning I spent the first 15 mins retching and bringing up acid until my insides felt bruised. with two DC's and a full time job, it was hell. You just have to take each day at a time - and if it so bad you can't function, then see your MW or GP

it does get easier for most of us xx

tanmu82 your post made me feel terrible just contemplating your situation, I feel suddenly fortunate!

Had a few days off sick (literally) and my mum came round to help with DS. I had to take anti-sickness pills though and they made me sleepy, so it helped the sickness but I still couldn't drive or function very well .

Those weeks were bloody hard going . Smell of sick in the house non-stop, constantly washing sicky cloths / duvet covers / pj's etc, although I did save money on the supermarket bill as I couldn't be bothered to eat and just chuck it all back up.

caz10 glad to have helped!

Seriously though, when I got pregnant this time around with a much waned 3rd child, I suddenly remembered (too late by then of course) the sheer hell that the first 14-16 weeks of pregnancy are.....add in the worry that everything is going as it should and you can have a pretty miserable time of it.

hope you're feeling better today!