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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

just had second miscarriage - when to try again?

17 replies

leo1978 · 27/09/2010 16:00

I have just had my second miscarriage in 4 months. Feeling crap but want to start trying again. I have one ds who is 3.3 and really do not want a big age gap although mother nature is not on my side! The hospital told me to wait 3 months for a successful go. Is this the case? I know anecdotally there are plenty of reasons to go for it again, but did anyone wait and why?

OP posts:

sarahbuff · 27/09/2010 16:03

So sorry to hear of your loss. :( From what I understand, there is no medical reason that you should have to wait, it's more an issue of giving yourself time to feel ready. I'd say, when you feel ready, go for it. Hope you aren't feeling too down about it. Hugs!

japhrimel · 27/09/2010 16:03

A MC can lead to you being anaemic and it may take some time for your cycles to settle down again. Some people think you may be slightly more fertile after a MC, but it seems you may also be slightly more likely to MC again so it balances out.

IMO though, the main reason to wait is whether you could cope with another MC straight away.

Is there anything you could do to improve your chances? Diet and supplements can take up to 3 months to have an effect.

KittyMee · 27/09/2010 16:06

I waited for 2 years ( I have no idea why, in retrospect; I wanted to be healthier/slimmer/be more financially prepared I think) but the nursing staff I dealt with aftewards told me to have at least one period and then try when it felt right for me. Think the consultant said similar. And like you said, there's lots of anecdotal evidence for trying pretty soon afterwards.

Hope you're ok, sorry that it's happened twice in 4 months, that's terrible for you.

Original poster

leo1978 · 27/09/2010 16:07

I wondered whether it makes you slightly more likely to miscarry again. Why would that be I wonder? What supplements do I need to take apart from folic acid?

OP posts:

Original poster

leo1978 · 27/09/2010 16:08

Yes, the first one was at 5 weeks and the second one at 7 weeks. I was absolutely gutted at the weekend but I feel ok now, just a bit blue I guess. I have a lovely boy at home so that helps.

OP posts:

Fulham1 · 27/09/2010 16:13

Sorry to hear about your losses. I know how you feel - i had 4 in a row! My mc consultant told me that your body is ready once you get your next period. The only issue is if you are emotionally ready for it. Another good piece of advice I got after mc#2 was to look on each pregnancy as a process, rather than a baby. Then once you go through the process, and have a successful 12 week scan, you can start planning for it being a real baby. This tip really helped me, though of course it may not be right for everyone. Lesley Regan's book "Miscarriage - what every woman should know" is very good and makes you realise how common it is. And above all, keep trying - I have a few years on you and am due imminently!
Best of luck.

Original poster

leo1978 · 27/09/2010 16:19

Yes, I think that is good advice re viewing it as a process. I let myself think that it was going to happen this time and that was my fatal flaw. I am just worried that the age gap between my children (if I am lucky enough to have another one) will be over 4 years. This is a silly thing to fixate on I know but I can't help it.

OP posts:

babybumpem · 27/09/2010 16:23

I had 2 miscarriages last year, one in august and one in november..i then waited until feb to try again, but only because i was geting married and didnt want anything to happen to spoil the wedding...i fell pregnant over our wedding weekend and i'm due in 4 weeks
I was told that its best to wait until you have had a couple of normal periods just so your cycle returns to normal.

Good luck

Original poster

leo1978 · 27/09/2010 16:23

So sorry to all of you who have had miscarriages too. They are so bloody awful/annoying/heartbreaking xx

OP posts:

Thandeka · 27/09/2010 16:29

My DD is 7months- conceived straight after miscarriage- no period in between. There are lots of stories on here saying similar- its as if you body wants to be pregnant again. But only do it if you feel emotionally and physically ready.

JoEW · 27/09/2010 16:49

Hi leo1978 I had a mc in May this year and was told to wait till I had one normal period before trying again. I think to ensure that your body is back in its regular cycle. I got pregnant on the second month of trying, so in July, (have also heard that your fertility might be increased in the 6 months after a mc) and am nearly at 12 weeks now.

Lots of luck trying.

japhrimel · 27/09/2010 16:54

As well as taking a full prenatal supplement to make sure you're not deficient in anything and get your folic acid levels up, your OH taking a good supplement can help.

Changing your and your OH's diet & lifestyle can also help - e.g. reducing caffeine & alcohol consumption, eating healthily, improving stress management and (for your OH) wearing less tight clothes/avoiding sitting at a desk too long. If you're overweight, losing weight can help.

Dr Regan's info is superb. I also found Zita West's book 'Guide to Getting Pregnant' useful.

Sarahlou8 · 28/09/2010 12:02

I had a mc at 15 weeks last November and got pregnant again 3 months later (now 36 weeks) I was advised to wait 1 month but many will say this is for dating purposes only.
I'm a great believer in that your body will only conceive when it is ready so if it is too soon, it won't happen.
We tried again straight away and it took 3 months, but during my mc and the two periods following I lost a lot of blood and as a direct result, now have to take iron as I am anaemic, so my advice would be make sure you're topped up with a good pregnancy supplement and a good a diet as possible.
Very best of luck xx

Secondtimelucky · 28/09/2010 12:07

There was a study in the news recently which suggested that women who didn't wait to coneive had more successful outcomes wasn't there? However, they weren't sure if that was associated factors - like if you wait you are getting that bit older, if you conceive again quickly you are probably overall more fertile, etc.

Thandeka · 28/09/2010 15:37

JoEW they recommend that so its easier for pregnancy dating purposes but if it was straightforward MC (not that they are straightforward on us but YKWIM) then it is fine to try without waiting. I know when I ovulate so I was able to date my pregnancy and it matched in with scan dates perfectly.

Because of the MC and now breastfeeding I am now coming up for two years with no periods! albeit with the horrible MC bleed a year and a half ago. :(

ILovePonyo · 28/09/2010 15:43

Hi, if this helps then I had a mc in May this year and then got pregnant again straight after, no period in between. Am now 20 wks, it was a bit harder to work out due date but had a dating scan at 12 weeks so that solved it!

Good luck, sorry to hear about your mcs, they can be so devasting. Hope things work out for you :)

allyfe · 28/09/2010 16:43

In the news, a couple of months ago, was some research which said that you are more likely to conceive in the first 6 months after a miscarriage, and that in most cases, it is more likely to go okay. I realise for you, sadly, this wasn't the case the second time.

The only reason you are sometimes told to wait for your first cycle is so you can date things, but that can be done with a scan anyway.

So, I think that you ought to be able to start whenever you feel ready.

Hope all goes well. :)

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