Feel awful, so tired and crap and low and irritable and weepy and shouting at kids. Do I blame the preg or get a grip?

[Adair]

I feel awful today. On verge of tears all the time, shouty, tired. kids slept through last night (though up at normal 6am - i got up at 6.45ish). I was awake a bit but am SHATTERED and really really fragile. Trying to eat lots but have shouted at both kids loads today. Thought I would be better once dd was at nursery but she ran into me nearly knockinh me over when i picked her up and i got annoyed with her, and she burst into tears. I feel terrible and gave her lots of cuddles ad pologies. Ds has been a normal 2 year old just on the slightly more annoyinggly destructive whingey side. So i have been irritable with him too.

I just feel soooooo tired and want to cry and escape it all. I am really really nervous about havign a third now. Feel like it is a big mistake tbh and i wont be able to handle it. But too late now.

is this normal for 23 weeks? do i need to get a grip (yes). feel so pathetic.

anyway, any words of encouragement/get a grip-ness welcome. or just thaks for letting me rant.

My poor Adair I do feel for you but can't help to think that it is absolutely normal. I cannot speak of experience as I am currently expecting my first; but I am puttng myself in your shoes and think I would probably be the same if not worse!

I think it is totally normal to have days like that and with everything that you have going on, I am not surprised you are feeling so low.

Try and focus on the positive. You have 2 beautiful children, you and everyone is healthy and your pregnancy is going well.
I guess your problems are normal ones and you should be happy to have those rather than life changing ones (sorry don't mean to sound patronising). :)

I am sure that in a few days you will feel better and there will be other days when you will feel low again...but that's part of the game, isn't it? and in the end you will realise that it was all worth it!!

Be strong and try to find time for yourself...even if only 30 mns; I am sure that will make a difference.

xx

Sounds like a normal day to me - and my DTD's are at school all day! I am 28+1 and feel very tired and weepy. Have just picked up girls froom school and got irritated with them already, God knows what I would be like if they were at home all day. Don't beat yourself up about it its pretty normal, and unfortunately, whoever is closest to you, is going to bear the brunt. When I get like this I go in the bathroom and hide and have a good cry, cos there's no doubt it does make you feel better! Hope things improve xx

Aw, sorry you're having a tough day! We all feel like it sometimes, even when we're not pregs! Don't feel too worried, at 23 weeks you still have a good 6 months before baby will be here, and it's hard to imagine, but in that 6 months your little ones will have changed a lot! My two older boys were 2yrs7mo and 19mo when my third boy was born, and it was lovely. The new baby just fit in with everyone else, his brothers adored him and though we had tough days (who doesn't no matter how old their other children are??) I wouldn't change it for anything. I found going from having one child to having two much tougher than going from two to three. Lots of people I know say the same thing, once you have two a third or fourth really isn't much adjustment. Hope they're right, my fourth is due in 6 weeks! Hope you feel better soon and if all else fails, put something on the tv, make a cup of tea and have a little lie down on the sofa! :)

Thank you all!

Have history of anxiety and so wondering if I was heading down a route... but I think what both of you have said, 'don't beat yourself up' is the key. I tend to feel bad that I am feeling bad and then feel anxious that I am not feeling ok. Need to go with it.

Have rung my mum and she is going to have them tomorrow - have a hospital appointment too which I am nervous about but hey.

Have also text dh to ask if he can come home on the earlier side... not very good at crying on his shoulder though, feel he thinks am being useless (don't think he does think this).

Sarahbuff, can't imagine your age gaps!! I hope you are right, that 2 to 3 is much easier... Dd will be 4.5 (she is lovely and no hard work at all), and ds will be 2.6 (no comment).

About to cuddle guinea pigs now, then will attempt to lie on sofa (without ds climbing on my head).

Totally normal, I feel exactly the same. I am 36 weeks with 2 dc aged 9 and 5. So so tired, on the verge of tears and angry with the world.

Would suggest you get some help with the children and some rest. Nothing else helps. Hope you feel better soon.

Just want to add my two pence worth, I'm currently 17 wks with a 2 year old and have been running on a VERY short fuse. Am totally shattered all the time and have had bad nausea (and now acne) so feel and look horid, other half came home last week to find me sobbing on the sofa. You have my sympathies and love!!!

Oh I really feel for you. I'm only 6+4 and am really dreading the next few months. I keep secretly thinking 'have I done the right thing?' I have DD 4.2 and DS 2.3. I have been a rubbish mummy the last few days. I have been feeling really rough so there has been a lot of tv watching in my house (which is also complete tip)! I keep trying to think that this time next year all will (hopefully) be good again!!

I am so glad to have found this thread. My DS is 2.3 and I am also 23 weeks and I have had no patience whatsoever for the last two weeks.

I also have a history of PND/anxiety and thinking that it is coming back makes me even worse IYKWIM. Esp as my mood swings hugely from minute to minute.

However the last two days have been good and the difference it has made to my overall outlook has been amazing. Hold on, cos the good days do come! I can't guarantee they last though, will keep you updated.

Thank you to the OP for posting and for everyone replying, just knowing it's not just me helps!

I sympathise too. I'm 22+2, with a DS who's 18mths and after a very relaxing weekend away (without DS) came back to a messy house, tired and grumpy DS and within an hour all the stress came back and I was on the verge of tears a few times. It doesn't take much I find! Then I get more annoyed thinking I can't have a nice glass of wine to de-stress at dinner cos I can't drink!

I'm afraid I don't have any advice, it may just be comforting to know there are a lot of us out there that are feeling the same way!!

Bless you all. It has been nice to hear that I am not a completely crazy mess. And glad some of you have been comforted to know you are not the only ones too!

Have just had lovely bath, the dc are at my mum's today. Got to go to hospital later for non-preg appt (I hope a talk-check-up rather than the hideously invasive one I was worried about). Also had a much better night's sleep! It's hard when it's all out of your control. I guess we really do have to rest - we forget we are growing a whole little person...

I do have a vague memory of saying with ds that newborn + toddler was easier than pregnancy + toddler... here's hoping!!