Come and tell me how wonderful it is to get pregnant at 24!!!

[24andbroody]

Or not!

I'm feeling really broody and I don't know what to do. I have:

-The perfect husband, we've been married for 3 years and he is 11 years older
-Stable economic situation
-Just graduated from a masters degree
-Have never had a "career" sort of job

So, what do you think?

Thanks!

Well, I was 24 when I fell pregnant with this one (DC3). It's a good age physically to have a baby and I guess you've probably got the mad partying of the late teens/early 20's out of the way.

If you think it's the right thing for you and your DH then go ahead. It's not really something anyone else can decide for you, or really advise you on. People only have their own experiences to go on, I had my first at 19 and wouldn't change that for the world and I guess the vast majority of people will feel the same, no matter what age they are/were.

It's not really a great deal to do with age, if you want a child and are in a situation where you feel financially and emotionally able to cope and do the best for a child then that is what is important.

Agree its more to do with how you feel than how old you are.

There are pros and cons for doing it earlier and later, I had my first at 29 and sometimes think it would have been nice to do it a bit earlier as I think you have more energy younger!

But on the other hand by leaving it a bit later I was able to get to a point where I had got to a reasonable level with my job/could come back to it part time etc which I did not have in my mid 20's.

So its all swings and roundabouts! You just have to go with what feel right for you and your DH. Good luck.

I think it can actually be a really good thing to have your children before you start a carrer. I have just turned 30 and am expecting my first one but it wasn't an easy decision to go ahead.
I think once you are in a career you feel under pressure from promotions and how quickly you want to go up the ladder. Deciding when to become pregnant can be a really tough decision to take.

as suppose there is always a reason (or excuse) to delay pregnancy because of work/finance/age...but I agree that the main thing is how fit and ready you feel for it.
The rest always comes along so I would say don't worry to much about these matters and concentrate more on how ready you are in your head.

Hope that helps and good luck! :)

As others have said, not much to do with age.

I'm 22, and currently seem to be rather pregnant.

If you've no education you desperately need to complete, no huge money worries and someone whose willing to do it with you ... why not?

All I've realised is that I now NOTICE so much more the stuff I can't do because of pregnancy i.e. move to a lower paying job, go for a job that requires loooong hours, suddenly go on a holiday with my girlfriends. But if that's secondary to having a child, does it really matter?

If you feel ready, what is stopping you?

i think it has nothing to do with age, do you think you r ready!?

im 24 and have a 2 , 3 and 5 years old dc's! so i wouldnt want to be pregnant now for obvious reasons!

Do it :)

If you feel like you want to then go for it ... I am 22 and have the same things (minus being married - but still the big age gap).

I'm due tomorrow and so excited :) It's been the best thing ever and I haven't even got the baby!

I'm going to do a PGCE next year after having a year off - life doesn't end - it's just the beginning!

Good Luck xx

Do it! I'm 26 and 9+4 pregnant with my first baby (planned), older DH, financially stable, completed education and a career which, although important, can wait for a few months.

If you both want kids, what would be your reasons for waiting? I am genuinely interested. Mine were rather superficial - I wanted to ski and live in Latin America for a while (despite having skied and lived in Latin America before...), but I decided it can wait until we can ski/travel with the baby :).

Good luck whatever you decide!

I was in a similar situation to you, and same age when I had ds1. It worked out really well, I wouldn't change a thing.

I had my first at 24 (then my second at 26 and my third at 28!).

I bought a house with DH and then got married within a couple of years of graduating from uni. He is 12 years older than me. I had started a "career" and never gave up work, although I did retrain and change career after having DC2.

I feel that having children in my 20s was right for me, I was ready and so was DH, and DH didn't want to be an "old dad".

If you feel that you are ready then there is nothing stopping you!

I'm 26 nearly and my ds is 2 in 3 weeks.
Wouldn't change my age of children for the world. Currently pg with number 2 and am loving having a young family. It's old enough to be responsible and established a good family routine etc, but young enough to enjoy a healthy work/kids/life balance. I am studying a masters at te moment and ave a nice social life when I get out and about. Plus the grandparents are both young enough to enjoy and help out. It's awesome. I highly recommend it.

As my mum tells me frequently, there is never the perfect time to have babies. There would always be something to wait for/want. If you waited for it, you'd never have them :)

I also had my first at 24 (then my second at 26 and just had my third at 28!). I have also done a phd in between DC1 and DC3 and got a job.

Its more about how you feel than how old you are but I have to admit its not the easy way round to do it but i wouldnt change it

I'm 28 now but when I had DD1, I was 22. I had just started my Nursery Nursing NVQ and had most definately not finished with the partying! I had DD1 and finished my course, did a bit of work then went to uni. Had DS when I was 26, right at the end of the second year (how I managed to keep going, I'll never know!). Had DD2 in May this year, right at the end of my 3rd year of my degree . Didn't quite manage to finish it and so am going back to resit some modules (it will still take another year), meanwhile, all my friends are today celelbrating their results. I feel quite sad that I missed out and have to do another year, but, I'm so happy to have DD2.

Guess the (long winded) point I'm trying to make is the same as everyone else, as long as the time is right for you, regardless of whatever else is happening, then there is no reason why you shouldn't just go for it.

I had DS1 when I was 24 (almost 25), was in a similar position to you - married with a mortgage, had my degree but wasn't in a career-type job. DH 8.5 years older than me. Seemed the ideal time. I don't regret it for a minute. DS1 is now 4, DS2 is 2. Once they're both at school I will take a good look at what I want to do career-wise but right now I'm happy doing odds and ends (music teaching and care work). I'm young enough to restart my career once they don't need me around so much.

Thank you so much for your posts!

2dogs1baby - CONGRATULATIONS AND BEST OF LUCK!!!

youngblowfish - The only reason for waiting is that I have no career and have never been properly independent financially. I worry that this is a "problem" but at the moment I think I feel a lot more excited about the prospects of having a baby than a career.

domesticsluttery - I don't want DH to be an old dad!

I suppose the questions is, as all of you have pointed out, how do you know when you are ready!? And I know no one else can answer this for me but it is nice to know what you think anyway!

I forgot to say, I have travelled a lot, partied a lot and lived in 2 different continents and 4 different countries. So partying and travelling are not at all reasons for delaying having children. I already live quite a nice settled life with my DH which probably horrifies some of my contemporaries but which I am happy with!!

To give you just an example of my "settled-ness", I discovered Lakeland a few weeks ago and was thorougly excited about it!

SecretSlattern - Good luck with your degree, I'm sure you will complete it and be an excellent nurse!

Thanks again for sharing your opinions and comments!

24andbroody, your life sounds lovely! My own financial independence was important for my DH and me, but that was a decision particular to us as a couple. DH did not want to propose until I had the financial means to say 'no' to him, without suffering a painful lifestyle shock. In hindsight, I appreciate that.

However, your financial independence is only an issue if you both see it as such. Also, I think it is not impossible, although admittedly more difficult, to climb the career ladder after having children, if that is what you want.

As for knowing whether you are ready, I am still not sure if I am. But I am really excited about becoming a mum and DH is over the moon. I reconciled myself with the fact that I will never be 100% certain that the time is right because there are no guarantees in life. So I am just trying to enjoy the moment!

I was 23 when I conceived and 24 when my eldest was born. I think it's great! I'm now on my 3rd (and last pg) at the grand old age of 30. They are all quite spaced out, so, I've been able to take my time and not rush having them so close together. So, I'll be 48 when my youngest is 18. That's still quite young, so I'll be able to have some of my life after children while I still have energy! If I'd pushed them all out sooner, I'd have probably had the whole of my 40s with grown up kids too!

The only downside I've had, is most of my 'mum' friends are a lot older than me - most are approaching 40 or are in their mid-40s. We still have quite close friendships and go on holiday together etc, but we have different refernce points and sometimes I feel like the 'baby' of the group.

I'm really pleased I had my 1st baby at 24, go for it!

As a side note, you may enjoy watching this documentary.

youngblowfish I watched it already and my broodiness levels rocketed to sky high-levels!!!!!!

I am so grateful to you all sharing your experiences with me :)!

I think I might speak to my mum about this very soon, which will make it a lot more real.

I'm 24, 21 weeks pregnant and will be 25 when the baby is born.

It wasn't planned but I am in an ok position financially (not great but who is?), OH and I are together and in a stable relationship (he is 6 years older than me), I have a degree and been in my job for almost 2 years so am entitled to all the benefits of mat leave - it isn't my "career" because I haven't got one yet but I think this is actually a positive thing. Having children is more important to me than having a fabulous career and was before I got pregnant anyway. There's time for all that.

Now that it has happened I am sure it is the right time for me.

Plus I have two dogs and don't get much of a life outside of them anyway I've done my partying and I was getting bored of it at 22 to be honest!

I started getting broody when i was 25, it started coming in little waves. I discussed it with DH a year ago after 1.5 years of marriage - he wasn't having any of it though!

Then I became pregnant by accident in March, went through all the emotions, joy, panic, regret (not staying on the pill) and feeling like the luckiest girl in the world.

Dh reacted completley differently to how either of us expected I think, he's made up about it, really excited about being a dad. he's already changed in his outlook loads and rising to occaison of being responsible.

I'm the only one of my friends anywhere near being a mum which is odd, and very aware that we'll soon be out of the loop in some ways of the weekends away, hols etc. But friends that count always stick through a massive change in your life I always find.

besides the body in its 20's is natrually ideal for childbirth, whatever society tells us, its a medical fact. I try and remember that whenever people are a bit scornful about my age!

I was in a pretty similar situation to you - I has DS1 at 25. I'd finished a masters degree approx 2 years before and I'd had two interesting jobs, neither of which were really 'career' choices. DH is older than me so he was more in a hurry. I was broody but also worried about what I was leaving behind.

On balance it has worked out fine, but there has been some really difficult moments. I was emotional throughout the pregancy, unsure if I was ready for it all. I was the only one of my friends with a baby, and it took some time to make mummy friends so I was pretty lonely for a while because my pre-baby friends couldn't understand why I couldn't leave a 6 week old BF baby at home so I could go on a weekend with the girls. I guess the other problem has been work - I converted my full time job into a part time one and I've had to stay there as there are few part time jobs available in the field I work in. Pre-DS1, I'm not sure I'd have planned to stay in the job as long as I have, but more exciting options are impossible at the moment because of the commute and childcare commitments. I thought I'd done enough partying to last a lifetime, and I idealistically imagined that our usual exciting holidays would be exactly the same, but we do not have family around to look after the DSs so DH and I have a night out together about once every two months which is pretty tough on our relationship, and holidays are so much more complicated now.

I wouldn't change things, and adding DS2 to the mix has made life even lovelier, but I guess I'm just saying that having children is not easy at any stage of life, but especially in your mid 20s when you are still working out your career, your marriage and your life. Good luck with whatever you decide!