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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Did anyone else block out the realities of pregnancy when TTC and now feels a bit shell shocked?

15 replies

TotorosOcarina · 13/09/2010 08:48

What I mean is, I've done it all before so I know what its really like but for some reason when I decided I wanted another I could just see 'lovely scans/DH rubbing my belly/first movements' etc...

and all thatis lovely, but how did I manage to block out the other 90% of pregnancy from my memory??

The peeing all night/constant vomiting/ tiredness (and me turning into the she bitch from hell at every oppotunity?!)

Of course now it all comes flooding back.

Christ I just feel like I'm only 8+3 and I feel this shite and tired already.

I'm super happy to be pregnant, please don't misinturpret this, but I just feel like this pregnancy is spanning yearsss ahead of me, like I've got to trawl this huge dessert and I've only just started out and already I wish I could see the finishing line!!

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DuelingFanjo · 13/09/2010 08:52

I feel super guilty as I have had a really good pregnancy (now 27 weeks) with no sickness or tiredness.

am sure my punishment will be if I get pregnant a second time then I will have the pregnancy from hell!

sorry to hear you are having a rough time, hopefully you will bloom in the second trimester.

Original poster

TotorosOcarina · 13/09/2010 08:59

Don't feel guilty, though am super

All my pregnancies have been like this (with hypermesis too) so its my own fault

I shouldn't moan either, I'm very, very lucky.

I just hate being ill and with 3 under 6 here already it makes everything so difficult!

OP posts:

MollysChambers · 13/09/2010 08:59

I bloody hate being pregnant - I feel your pain. But, yes, we still go back for more. I've done it three times. I think it took until the third time for it to actually register in my brain how much of a struggle it is. Or perhaps when you want a baby your memeory just becomes very selective. I look at pregnant women now and think "Oh how lovely. Soooo glad it's not me...."

First trimester always the worst for me. It'll be worth it in the end. Hope your feeling better soon

HumphreyCobbler · 13/09/2010 09:07

because we forget that it really can be THAT bad

i tried so so hard to have my first baby and withing one week of conceiving I was deep in the hell that is pregnancy

with my second pregnancy I conceived quickly (a total shock after my previous experience) and I quickly discovered the vileness that is pregnancy whilst looking after a toddler

ShowOfHands · 13/09/2010 09:12

DH is quietly angling to ttc no 2. Every now and then his gentle questioning starts to work. I remember scans and kicks and lying in bed stroking a wriggling stomach and being excited. Then when his sneaky brain fog clears I remember the vile sickness and inability to eat for months and how the smallest smell turned my stomch inside out and how 'run over by truck' I felt for weeks and I run screaming to the Boots condom aisle.

It's worth it isn't it though? Please remind me it's worth it.

Oh god. Labour. It's never happening.

Rocklover · 13/09/2010 09:21

I am the same, had an awful pregnancy with dd nearly 6 years ago, but the time lapse between her and this one allowed me to forget the actual reality.

I am 20 weeks and should be blooming, but I am getting bloody worse if anything, constant nausea, upset tummy, wind, constant heartburn and feeling tired. My body hates pregnancy and I really think this will be my last (although my dp keeps suggesting we should have one more, this is is first, dd is my exh's).

I really want this baby, don't get me wrong, but I really can't wait until Jan and this is all over.

caramellokoalalover · 13/09/2010 09:29

Totoros I could have written your post . Am 8+6 and thinking I will be pregnant and sick forever. I don't know how or why I thought I could do this all again! And I feel guilty for feeling like that when I did know what I was doing when I was ttc, and I know I'm lucky to be able to have a baby...

I think I'd better go and look at pics of cute newborns to remind myself of the end result!

Bumperlicious · 13/09/2010 09:34

We very nearly considered adopting to avoid me being pg again. i am really not doing this again. many sympathies to you. being pg can be shite x

pettyprudence · 13/09/2010 10:00

I'm 11 weeks and have come to realise that I was right all along - my friends were all lying and there is nothing remotely lovely about pregnancy! ITS ALL A BIG CONSPIRACY!!!

Thank god for the first scan last week - it really cheered me up seeing the little one for the first time, dancing around my belly!

allyfe · 13/09/2010 14:45

Not everyone likes being pregnant! A friend of had a couple of friends that really didn't enjoy their pregnancies, but still loved being new mummies. Another friend dind't enjoy pregnancy 1, but did enjoy pregnancy 2. So don't worry, even if most people are gushing about how much they love it, there are lots who don't.

However, do remember that the first trimester is generally the hardest. The third is often a bit hard going, but by that point the end is in sight so it doesn't feel so difficult.

Good luck!

mrsflux · 13/09/2010 15:20

i am SURE the brain blocks out the trauma of the first trimester because as animals we need to make sure we re-populate and so have enough children to replace us in the population when we die.
No-one would have a second/ third/ more child if they remembered all the gory details properly.

i keep telling myself this as i kneel by the toilet heaving my last meal back up. :(
i know i had bad MS last time, i know i was a mess for a lot of my pregnancy, i know i hated it a lot
BUT it is only a phase, all this will pass

(thanks whoever you were on mumsnet who passed on this mantra!)

Samraves · 13/09/2010 15:35

Hmmmm, I am never doing this again - I am not risking it! This is my first - I am now 29 weeks and have felt varying degrees and types of rubbish every day since about two weeks after I conceived.

In fact my facebook status today was something along the lines of 'uuurrgrgghhh... i hate reflux.... yuk.... can't wait for Nov 19th' I hate being pregnant and anyone who tells me to 'enjoy it, it may be hard work, but it is a wonderful time' should try living in my body (or anyone else who feels sick / refluxy all the sodding time) and then come back in six months and tell me just how wonderful they feel! Pah! Rant over :)

babylann · 13/09/2010 16:40

I get it from DP all the time. I'm like, "Ohhh, I miss being pregnant :( I want another baby" forgetting the pre-eclampsia, the back ache, the anemia, the fact that I didn't move for 3 months, couldn't do even the lightest housework. A friend of mine recently had a baby and I was actually jealous that she was in labour. "I loved being in labour!" I declared, forgetting I was in labour for 3 days and broke down into tears once every 6 hours when they told me I still hadn't dilated past 1cm.

"Rose tinted goggles," he said.

Apparently it's a normal thing. You block out the bad stuff so you're not scared of doing it again.

spilttheteaagain · 13/09/2010 19:13

I'm so with you.

I was nearly in tears on Friday when I was 16 weeks, because 16 weeks is quite a chunk through, right? But actually there are still 24-26 weeks to go. And it has all been awful so far... (DC1 so no idea about late pregnancy, but I am soooo looking forward to not being pregnant).

wem · 13/09/2010 19:18

Yep, the first time I was sick this pregnancy, it all came back to me. I have never been sure how many children I wanted but right there and then I decided two was plenty :)

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