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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

worried about leaving my son

12 replies

Mummyofmax · 10/09/2010 21:58

hi all
im 35+5 weeks and getting tearful about leaving my four year old son when I go into hospital. the silly thing is i know he will be ok with my mother in law but cant bear the thought of him being upset at night because he generally wants me or my partner at night.
Hormones eh?
x

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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CommonSenseSuze · 10/09/2010 22:04

I'm not in your situation, but I can understand your situation. I crave time on my own, but then worry myself silly that DD (2 years old) won't be ok without me.

It's natural because you're a good mum!

Will your partner be with him, as well as your MIL?

niamh29 · 10/09/2010 22:06

Prepare him, I find with our 4 year old the more we prepare her and talk to her about something the better she adjusts when the time comes, and of course he will be fine and you MIL will probably spoil him and he'll have a great time!

onimolap · 10/09/2010 22:06

Try not to fret!

We'd made good arrangements for DS to go to lovely neighbours whose children were good friends at the same nursery. When I had time to think, I fretted about my poor baby waking up in the morning with neither parent there.

When DH went to fetch him, DS was having such a good time he wouldn't leave and had to be bribed out with chocolate buttons!

He'll be fine, really, he will.

thisisyesterday · 10/09/2010 22:07

awww, i bet he will be absolutely fine!

you could always have a homebirth tho!!!

Original poster

Mummyofmax · 10/09/2010 22:13

thanks everyone
my partner will be with me while im in labour but then will be at home so im praying for a quick labour!! he will be spoilt rotten, its just the thought of leaving him im struggling with.
i just love him so much!
x

OP posts:

Fredfred · 11/09/2010 09:35

I know exactly how you feel and I really sympathise. I am worried sick about leaving my DD who will have only just turned 2 when my DC2 arrives. I still don't know what I am going to do with her as have no family living anywhere nearby. I am trying not to think about it too hard as I get tearful (although I know I will have to sort it out soon). I was in hospital after having DD for a week and am so hoping that I will be in and out this time. Home Birth is not an option for me.

Ineedsomesleep · 11/09/2010 09:38

Agree with Thisisyesterday, you could always choose a homebirth.

He'll be fine though.

DomesticG0ddess · 11/09/2010 11:52

I know what you mean, except we will be relying on friends, not even family!! I am just over 34 weeks and I need to compile a list of friends according to who is available when, who's DHs are on shift work when, etc etc. It is quite stressful. DS only wants me in the night, not even DH though we are trying to work on this. Luckily he doesn't wake too much. Home birth is not an option for me either.

thisisyesterday · 11/09/2010 12:46

how about having a doula with you so that your dh is more available for the other child/ren?
or a close friend as a birth partner?

Kity · 11/09/2010 15:05

Hi there,
This worried me too, I got really tearful about this before I had my daughter 2 weeks ago. My son is 2 years old and I felt terrible about not been there for him.

Anyway, he was in good hands with my mum and sis and his cousins, and I was adamant about him coming to visit the day after Id had my daughter. He came the following day in the afternoon and it was so nice to see him and I did have a little cry but it was nowehere near as bad as I thought. I was in hospital for 2 nights (csection)and I made sure that my hubby left hosptial in time to be home to put my son to bed. It was really important that one of us was there for him.

All I would say is if you can see him as soon as you can then it doesnt feel like youve been away from him for a long time.
Good luck!!

Original poster

Mummyofmax · 11/09/2010 21:20

thanks all
Its nice to hear from you all. I dont think a home birth is an option for me. figured its better to go to hospital. hopefully wont be in long though.
xx

OP posts:

NothingButTheTeuch · 11/09/2010 21:26

I was really cut up about this before the birth of DS2. As it was, my waters brole as I put DS1 to bed (9pm...we were staying with family) and DS2 was born in early hours and DH was home to waken him and tell him the good news

I know it couldn't have been more perfect, but I guess I'm saying that I hadn't even given thougt to the fact that it may not be a problem!

I think the whole situation is tied up with horrible feelings about somehow doing an injustice to your relationship with DC1 by having another...you just have to tell yourself that they might be upset for a very short time but you are giving them one of the best gifts you can get: a sibling

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