Husband is too afraid to cuddle me.

[cockle84]

My husband is so worried he is going to harm our baby that he won't give me a proper big hug. He has to keep a small gap between. How do I explain to him that the baby is so well looked after that a hug isn't going to hurt him/her. I'm 13 weeks BTW.

I'm guessing you've tried to explain that it's okay already, so has he got a pregnancy book for men? That should help him understand how well protected the baby is in your uterus. It will certainly talk about how it's okay to have sex so logically a hug is no problem . My DH is reading a book called 'Pregnancy for Men: the whole nine months', which is quite light hearted.

Thanks - good idea!

Wish mine would do the same. He will barely touch my bump because he thinks he is 'puttin pressure' on her! Bloody hell! Don't even get me started on the sticky-out bellybutton!

Ahhh, that is really sad. Godo that he is so protective, bad that you aren't getting cuddles.
Tell him the baby needs to hear his voice, and if he is cuddling the bump it will carry better. that way when baby is born, s/he will be soothed by daddy's voice that they heard in the womb. Also tell him baby will benefit from mu releasing happy hormones when cuddled.

So if he wants to help th ebaby, he shoudl cuddle mum and talk to the bump!

(I know 13 weeks is a bit early for baby to hear but husband doesn't need to know that, and the happy hormones surging through your body when cuddled and loved will be beneficial to the baby however small the baby is)

Should read 'Good that he is so protective...'

apols for other spelling mistakes, am typing secretly at work with minimised screen..

My husband is like this, he has always been, even with pregnant friends (visibly cringed when a heavy handed husband of a friend pushed her bump once). Last week the Dr doing my scan pushed the bump gently with the scanning thing to make the baby move to see something and my husband shouted out " don't do that, we don't need to see that!". He just can't bear it!

Ah im sorry, that sounds really sad... My husband loves touching the bump and I love him touching it - I really feel that its brought us loads closer and we are already very very close as it is.
He has read about 4 baby books, been to all my appointments and helps out loads, so im really lucky as I read so many stories on here of how their husbands/partners dont want to know / touch them / get interested in the baby.

All I can say is, get him a book that he can read in his own time to explain wheats going on inside you, and that cuddling (and more!) is NOT going to harm the baby...
'Pregnancy for Men-The whole nine months' was one that was recommended and that my hubby really liked - its from a male's point of view too.

I hope he comes round, cockle84 as pregnancy can be a bit lobely sometimes and you really need your husband there to understand whats going on, and just be there to havea cuddle when you need one.

((Hugs))

That should be lonely, not lobely! damn keyboard :)

Tell him that you would not be able to lie down or wear jeans or well, most things if a small pressure could be that bad for the baby.

He'll get over it. Mine was scared to have sex for ages. Finally he got jumped and after a couple times of me taking advantage of him he learned everythgn would be ok and is fine with it now :)

Thanks everyone - he has read the book but he is just so stressed that something is going to go wrong. His mum and sister have tried telling him to chill out but he doesn't seem to listen - Now I've got to try and explain to him that I'm Rhesus Negative and that its extremely rare for this to cause any problems with first pregnancy but I know he'll stress over this and start researching every little thing to do with it.

I know I should be pleased that he is taking such an interest.