I am 32 weeks pregnant with my third child. My son was 4 weeks early and 8.5lbs and my daughter was just under 2 weeks late and 9.14lbs. My daughter had shoulder distocia (got stuck) and the nurses and doctors had to use the MC Roberts manoeuvre. ( I had to lay flat on my back and the my legs went by my head and they pulled her out) The experience was not pleasant and my daughter needed oxygen.
After having my son 9 years prior to my daughter and not the best birthing or pregnancy experience I really wanted to have a ?natural birth? ie using water for pain relief and gas and air. I had spent the whole time with my son strapped to a monitor unable to move about lying on my back in the bed. When it came to my second birth I was older and had done more research and learnt that even if I needed to be strapped to a monitor again I could move around or at least sit on a ball.
I don?t think that the midwife helped the situation for the majority of time that we were in the hospital she didn?t listen to anything that I said. I had michonium in my waters and so the midwife strapped me to a monitor and told me that I could not move from the bed. When I needed the toilet she was unhappy because she had to take off and refit the monitor. The bed that I was on was broken so I had to jump off and my husband had to lift me on.
When I told her that I needed to push because the baby was coming she didn?t believe me and told me that I was a ?stupid girl? for pushing because i was making my cervix bleed because the baby was not ready to come. She kept referring to the baby as my 1st and said that it would be a slow progression despite both my husband and I telling her it was my 2nd. At one point I resisted and asked for an epidural which was something I really didn?t want. When the midwife was on the phone to anaesthetist she caught a glimpse of the head I presume and hit the emergency buzzer.
I needed stitches afterwards the midwife began to do this and had inserted a tampon with scissors on the end. After a few moments she said that a surgeon needed to stitch me and that i would have to wait. After 20 minutes had past she re-entered the room and said that he was tied up in theatre and would get to me asap. 3.5 hours later my legs were still in stirrups i was bursting for the toilet the midwife was nowhere to be found- my husband and i were still heavily traumatised by the birthing experience and felt helpless. The surgeon came in and looked mortified he said nothing and left. A few moments later he returned with the midwife and asked for an explanation of why I had been left in that condition. The midwifes response was that I had refused to let her stitch me. This was a lie and i was in shock and couldn?t believe that she had said this. The surgeon stitch me which was very painful especially when the painkiller had run out and he had 3 more to do so did them without adding more.
I returned to the hospital when my daughter was a month old to see my notes and found they were less than reflective of my birthing experience. I made an appointment to see the head midwife and was determined to do something for closure to the experience. When I returned to the car and found a parking fine I had a huge melt down. It seems silly now but I definitely had post natal depression and my husband was concerned that I was making it worse. The short story is that after a few unsuccessful tries of speaking to the head midwife I gave up. I felt like failure for never addressing what happened but was determined for this to never be my experience again.
That was three years ago and I am now preparing for the birth of my third child. I wanted to have a home birth and use gas and air. I wanted to take back some of the control that I didn?t have last time at the hospital. I have been told now that I cannot have a home birth or be in the home from home unit in the hospital because I have a 1 in 10 chance of shoulder distocia reoccurring.( Which means that if the baby gets stuck then the doctors have 5 minutes to get the baby out) My third child is presenting itself as a big baby also already on the 97th percentile.
The hospital have not offered me a c-section but have said that it could be a possibility. However, the thought of a c-section is not appealing to me but the thought of having an emergency c-section, and the decision being left up to the person on shift at that time scares me more. Both of my children have been born in the graveyard hours which I have read reporting can make a difference to the experience. I don?t want to make excuses and I am very aware of the fact that my whole situation is based on probabilities and not certainties.
The doctor appears to have wait and see attitude to when I am labour and go with the flow which I am sure sounds reasonable to everyone but me. The fact that I cannot have a home birth or be in the home from home centre which is across the corridor in the hospital to me says that there is a significant medical risk. I would rather have a planned c-section in this scenario because it would all happen at a certain time and date and I would have a planned epidural etc... All of the things that I would prefer not to have but would rather have in a controlled environment. I would hate to have the excruciating pains of contractions whilst trying to hold still while a needle is inserted into my back. Or worse still that the decision is made too late and my child is deprived of oxygen. I know this all sounds very dramatic.
I have been booked in for a 36 week growth scan and an appointment with the consultant. I really need any help/advice /suggestions/ stats that are against c-sections because I am risking so much more by having a planned c-section when I have only a 1 in 10 chance of shoulder distocia and intervention