Am I expecting too much from my midwife?

[thelastlifeline]

Hi Y'all

Was just wondering; am in 2nd pregnancy, all is fine, but I seem to have seen very little of my midwife. I am due in 11 weeks, just saw her last week and she says I'll not see her again til 36 weeks - isn't this a bit late (and I have to phone her to make the appt!)? She hasn't even mentioned birthing options (had a difficult birth last time, ending in emergency c-section), has only just realised that I have a lung condition, similar to cystic fibrosis, which means I have to have the babe in hospital (she's based in the community)and had to keep checking her file to remember my name, am I being too precious about this or should I ditch the midwife and just see my GP? Help ??

I have 14 weeks to go and have only seen mine twice. I thik the contact becomes more frequent the nearer your due date gets.

My midwife is at my surgery every tuesday and I can make more appointments if I want, could you do the same?

I just checked the list of appointments I was given and in my area, for a subsequent baby, you see the MW at 28 and then 34, 36 & 38 weeks. The 31 week appointment is for 1st babies only.

It does seem a bit strange - the 34 week appointment in my area is a double appointment to go over birth choices and more tests.

I am 31 almost 32 weeks, and I saw midwife this morning, before that was 28 weeks and next one is 3 weeks again.
This is my 2nd, think it depends on area.

For your second and sunsequent babies they just let you get on with it I think! I had barely any appts second time around. Don't worry about it :)

I will have had 10 MW appts up to this friday coming(40 wks.) Its my first pregnancy. Only thing out of the ordinary has been slightly dodgy bp and breech presentation.

This is my DC1 - so I really have no idea what I am talking about. But it strikes me that if this pregnancy and the expected delivery was completely normal and boring and uneventful, then yeah maybe don't stress. But you had a emergency section last time (has there been any discussion of whether you want/need an elective this time?) and you have a medical condition (is it possible that it might impact on your experience of the pregnancy - e.g. increased breathlessness?) then I think I might want more contact. Personally, I don't think you are being unreasonable or precious at all. How you go about getting more contact and possibly from a different MW, I'm afraid I don't know. I'm still feeling my way with all of this and all my MW care has been in hospital. You mentioned your GP - do you have a good relationship with him/her? Is he/she clued up on this stuff? Might be a good starting point. Good luck!

im 37wks x and only seen my midwife 3x one of them where not a check just to sign a form, and im on my 4th.

i hardly saw midwife at all during 2nd pregnancy. they missed blood sugar problems and the fact my baby was going to be more than 10 lbs!

Yep - they generally skip the 31 weeks here too, although she offered me an option for an appointment, and I took it.

Next appt is 34 weeks for me.

Make an interim appointment if you like, either GP or MW. You can always find a reason why you needed one!

Mrspickles, yes I have had one consultant appt and have been given another in 3 weeks time. Saw the registrar last time and he's the only who's mentioned birthing options - thank god some1 did else I'd be borderline hysterical now!

tablefor3, think I may well try for an interim appt with my GP, as you say I'll find a reason!

My midwife and my handout both say that the scheduled appointments are a minimum and that I can have more if I need them.

I would have thought that because of your medical condition you would have been under consultant care. I have diabetes and have been at least once a fortnight since my 8 week booking in scan. Am 18+3 with #1 now and I will see someone, midwife or consultant, this frequently until delivery. And as for not remembering your name I think that is just a bit rude. She may have lots of mums to see but a little bit of 'customer service' goes along way. Can you request more contact?

I'm in my first pregnancy but have had appts at 28wks, 31wks, 34ks, 37wks then I think it'll be 39wks and 41wks.
My MW is lovely and doesn't mind me just making special appts if I want them for any reason. I would have thought if you don't feel like you've had enough appts, then you haven't. Maybe just make a special appointment and say yo want to discuss your birth options and any concerns.
Her not knowing your name is just a bit rude. My name's unusual and har to pronounce and my MW remembers it, she even remembers my partner's name despite having only met him once.
Put your foot down!

2nd pregnancy and hardly ever see my mw, even in last trimester it has been rare to say the least, now at 39weeks i'm down to 2 weeks, my appointments consist of urine, blood pressure and fetal heartbeat, no talk of birth options etc, almost assume i know what i want already as i've been there and done it before, but since every baby and birth is different a bit of offering of advice would be nice. Instead i feel rushed in and rushed out.

On the other side I haven't had any complications and I'm happy if it means my lack of contact means that people that really need it do get the time and attention required. sounds like that isn't the case for you and think you should ask for more time or appointments. all the best and hope this birth is easier than the last and your mw makes a bit more effort.