Should I take my older children to 12 wk scan?

[expectingno3]

Just wondering what others have done. I'd love to take them (8 and 6), but am fully aware a scan can not always go to plan. Am I best waiting till the 20 wk one? Thanks.

I think it's lovely to want to include older children. There is not alot for children to see really at a scan though is there. My scans were always quite quick and they only briefly turned the screen round for us to look. Did let us have pictures though. I took ds1 and ds2 aged 6 and 3 at the time to ds3 20 week scan but all others just dh and I went to. If I knew everything was fine with baby and could afford it I would arrange a private scan where they take their time and everyone can get a good look. 12 week scan I would say no children.

Here's a compromise if you really want to take your children (and i do think it's a lovely idea in theory) - why don't you go to this scan on your own (or with your partner) to be sure all is well; then, if it's good news, arrange another scan privately in a few days/weeks time that they can attend with you?
the 3D scans are lovely for this - they will be able to see baby moving etc.
There is absolutely no way i'd take them along to a 12 week scan without knowing what the sonographer is going to find. I could not discourage you from doing this enough. just because your other pregnancies have gone smoothly, doesn't mean there isn't always a chance of bad news.
I've personally had four miscarriages, two of which were missed miscarriages, which were only detected through scanning, so for me, it is always a terribly anxious procedure. i wouldn't dream of having my children participate in the immediate misery and wouldn't underestimate how traumatic that could be.

Gosh, where do I start? I have never had so many replies to a post. Thankyou everyone. I think on reflection, I won't take them, but yes, its a good idea to maybe pay for a 3D scan at a later date. Best wishes everyone, and thanks again. x

I nearly went to a 20 week scan on my own and thought DH was being silly for insisting on coming, a friend had DS and I was so grateful when they told me DS2 had died.
I like to think I'm mature but itwas the most devastating news and I'm glad I had some time just with DH before telling DS.

Many apologies for the mature enough comment - it was the wrong choice of words (blame pregnancy brain). I didn't want to offend anyone. I was not in anyway trying to undermine anyone who has had a terrible scan result. All I was trying to say was that I felt that if I had bad news and the children were present I feel I would be able to hold myself together. I did not intend in anyway to upset anyone who has suffered a pregnancy loss or had bad news at a scan and I am truly mortified that I have done so.

While I had no choice to have the children there due to lack of childcare, I still wanted them to be there as I want them to be involved in something that will ultimately affect their lives too.

Once I am very sorry for any offence caused.

Just wanted to comment that we took our DC's aged 10 & 3 to our 12 week scan, however we had had a private nuchal scan before this so we were confident that everything was ok. Our hospital was fine with this and the sonographer was very good and explained the scan to them. We didn't take them to the anomaly scan just incase any structural problems were identified but once we were assured that baby was fine we paid for a private 3/4D scan for all of us which was a great experience and the DC's loved it.

Good luck with your scan OP :)

Thank you Madas - what a lovely, gracious apology. I really do appreciate your taking the time to come back on and post that

I planned on taking DS to my scan last time around but the pregnancy didn't make it that far :(
This time, assuming I get there, I have no intention of taking him (just in case there is bad news).

my hospital does a dvd and photos for a small fee so no need to take dc. I did think about bringing dd but we decided against it just in case it is bad news. I have scan on monday.

Ditto to most of the posts on here re:not taking children to scans, I would also add that if you do for whatever reason your DP/another adult is prepared to sit outside with them until the scan is finished then bring them in to see the baby as a family. Partly because of the length of time to sit still if small children and also incase a problem was picked up (very unlikely). It is easy to say that you would ask your DP to leave with the children if there was a problem whilst it was explained to you etc but bear in mindyou won't realise there is a problem until the sonographer tells you which puts them in a very difficult position in how to tell you this without scareing your children/without knowing how much you are prepared for them to hear (especially with older children). It can make an already horrendous time even worse. Like I said, it is so rare to find a problem, but that is the purpose of the scan so you do have to be prepared for that.

God what a miserable sounding post... I hope you get where I am coming from!