antenatal depression

[thewilderness]

I'm 24 weeks and feeling bad a lot of the time. Very sad, buckets of tears, wild anger outbursts and a generally crap. I've only felt this bad in the past two weeks - odd moments before, and anxiety, but not this horrible feeling inside. I've depression before, but not for a long time and I've managed to get through it.

it's a shameful thing because I have this baby in me and I feel terribly guilty that I want it all to stop and for me to be able to be alone and still - it's hardly his fault

I have a midwife appointment next week so i will mention it. But should I see my doc too? I'm really reluctant to try antidepressants, even those that are meant to be safe in pregnancy.

Anyone else had this experience - does it pass? Any tips for tackling it? Does this mean I'm prone to post natal depression?

My partner is good but he doesn't really get it and he gets frustrated.

Hi.
I suffered with it when I was pregnant with ds2.
I think I also still had PND from ds1 though as well, so is hard to separate the two if infact it was 2 separate issues.
My midwife dragged a gp into our appointment and he recommended anti-deppresants and also councilling, both of which I refused.
When ds2 was about 3 months, I lost the battle and went onto a low dose of prozac to help me cope.
Ds2 is now 18 motnhs and I am still on them and don't think I will be off them anytime soon, but I have a crap partner who does FA and no family local so not much help at all really.
Hopefully as you have a good partner, things will be easier for you.
There are a lot of websites that have information to partners and families of depression sufferers, maybe he could have a look at some of them?

I have no experience of this what so ever but wanted to reply.

I very much wanted this baby but we didn't plan it and I am in the process of taking a postgraduate course due to finish in December (Baby due in 2 weeks), plus due to finances I will only be having 2 weeks off (I am a childminder so will still be home with the baby). I have been feeling a lot of pressure from everywhere and have had days where all I have done is cry and just felt that I can't cope at all with any of it. I am working from 7.30 until 6 so it's a long day I am often tired. Plus I had a worry at one point as the baby was transverse and my consultant was talking about me having to go in before due date and waiting to go into labour, so more concerns about what I would do with DS and what all my customers would do!

I would just like to say that I also have really good days where I feel I can do it all and nothing phases me so although I did have concerns over antenatal depression I think it's just that I have a lot on my plate and it is sometimes overwhelming! Don't know if this is the case for you but just wanted to say others do ahve bad days and the pregnancy hormones definitely make things appear much worse than they are at times.

Yeah, cinnamon is also right. I smashed up 2 hoovers when I was pregnant with ds1 because I couldn't get the filter back on after emptying it!

Wilderness - I have just phoned my midwives to see if I can talk to their counselling midwife - do you have similar where you are?

I've suffered with depression before and feel it coming back - not washing my hair/getting dressed/letting work slide.

I also feel like I have no connection to this baby and am unable to imagine myself as a (single) parent.

People ask me whether I'm looking forward to having a baby and my honest answer is "not really". Then I feel bad in case something happens to him and I'll have caused it by not caring enough.

It's awful but I know it's not really me thinking these things (if you see what I mean).

The best ways to get out of an impending depression is gentle exercise, talking to someone about your concerns and making an effort to find enjoyment in your life. Shame I can't take my own advice at the moment!

Hope you feel better soon.

Thanks all - I do see a therapist but she's away in August. I will see how I get on and keep a strict eye on it. I do a lot of exercise already and trying to eat lots of good food...sometimes with the best will in the world it doesn't go easily

I hope you all feel better soon too.

Hi Thewilderness - just wanted to sympathise and say that I've had a different version of this. 26 weeks preg with very much wanted baby after years of infertility treatment. I hit a nasty antenatal depression patch when I finally got pregnant, just when I expected to be happy and relieved. Tearful, withdrawn and unable to enjoy being pregnant or even look at the scan pictures until after 20 weeks. It has got better though, without resorting to drugs thank goodness. I've had the support of a brilliant acupuncturist who specialises in fertility and is able to help with mind and body stuff in a way that western medicine sometimes seperates too much, which I'm certain has been a big part of it. Very good luck and hope you feel better soon.