Am I being over sensitive?????

[LittleDonkin]

I am 30 weeks pregnant with my first child and my husband doesnt seem at all interested. I like to sit in the evenings with my belly on show watching her move and feeling her kick and the other night my husband asked why I have to do it and asked me to cover it up. He keeps having a go at me for buying minimal baby clothes. I said to him last night does he think its amazing that I am growing our child and he just shrugged and said not really. I am now starting to worry about what he is going to be like when I'm in labour. I can imagine him telling me that I'm embarassing myself if I'm screaming and shouting so I'm contemplating not even having him as my birthing partner now. I want to enjoy these last few weeks of the pregnancy but I seem to be walking on eggshells and have to stop myself from talking about "pregnancy and baby stuff" as so I dont cause an argument!

No, you are not being over-sensitive, he is being a complete dick.

Maybe you could try buying him that pregnancy book for dads (forget what it;s called). I think sometimes the father's feel left out and unconnected to the baby. Maybe it would help him feel like it's all real?

My dh was a bit like this, not really interested, he also has a bit of a hospital phobia due to treatment received as a child. I had my sister as birth partner which was great as she'd had 2 children recently at the same hospital so knew what I was going through. But dh was in the hospital and saw dd very soon after birth and bonded with her immediately and is a brilliant father. I'm pg again and dh still isn't really interested while I'm pg, but I know he'll be excited when the baby is born. Is there someone else you can talk babies too, or anyone else you'd consider having as a birth partner? My mums going to be my birth partner this time, and me and dd talk baby talk alot as shes 5 and v excited about getting a sibling. But I talk to my mum, sister and friends about babies more than I do dh.

DH is nowhere near as excited as I am but then he's not really experiencing it all as I am. He doesn't actually like feeling the baby move and I often put his hand on my belly to freak him out because it makes me laugh! I think it's amazing and wonderful but he finds the whole thing very difficult, hates the uncertainty of it all and was very relieved when DS arrived and we were both fine.

Having said all of that he still listens to all I have to say and although may not be very excited about it all does humour me. If I want to get all gooey over tiny little baby clothes I go out with my mum or chat with my best friend.

It's hard to say without knowing your DH whether it's just the pregnancy that he won't be connected with but I agree that it can be very hard for men and they are detatched from it all. Try and talk to him about your concerns especially if you are thinking of not having him at the birth it would be sad if you both looked back and regretted him not being there. Good luck with it all.

See I am trying to involve him as much as possible and asking what he thinks about EVERYTHING! I'm not sure if that is were I am going wrong! I said I would get him a pregnancy for dads and he said what does he want that for!!!!!! It may be that he is scared as he has never been around babies that much whereas I have 6 nieces and newphews under 9!