should i call?

[sarahmia]

I am 8 weeks pregnant, after losing a baby at 26 weeks that had triploidy.
When i went to my 12 week scan with that baby I was told the baby was healthy and that i should just come back for a scan 2 weeks later to redate me. When i went back 2 weeks later after being passed from sonographer to sonographer. I was finally told that my baby had brain, heart and growth problems, severely. I cannot imagine that this all happened within 2 weeks! so... eventually i was sent to the FMU where i saw a consultant and he took one look and said that he thought it was triploidy. i kept going back to see him to monitor the pregnancyi untill i lost the baby. He is the only person i trust and I want to see him this time for my 12 weeks scan. He has a midwife that works alongside him, who i really liked and i would like to call her and see if he will see me, if push comes to shove i will pay for him but dont really have that kind of dosh to throw around.
do you think im wasting my time???

No way. Go for it. If thats what you really want and would make you feel better after what you had to go through before then do it. After all, if you dont ask, you dont get.

Try - you have nothing to lose. I would do it if I was you..

Definitely try to self refer.

I have had the same midwife through 5, sadly unsuccessful, pregnancies. The second two of those being lost to feotal abnormalities. I now see the same consultant and midwife at the FMU and it makes such a difference. I have had the same midwife through all 5 pregnancies, even though I've not actually seen her much as I've not made it past 12 weeks so far, she and the FMU midwife both actively welcome me to contact them by phone or email any time if I have any questions or concerns and go that extra mile for me.

In my first 2 pregnancies I didn't realise you could self refer to the midwife rather than doing it via the doctor but my midwife made a point of telling me that I could if I wanted to and that she would be happy to arrange early scans and a close eye.

I would, being pregnant is frightening in itself and if this chap makes you feel calmer then go for it they can only say no and chances are they won't.

I was under the care of the FMU with my second baby which I lost at 18 weeks. When I got pg with my 3rd I went to the same MW and consultant on my request even though there were no probs with the PG. I just phoned the MW up and it was all sorted. My GP then formally referred me (at about 16 weeks I think!) to make sure NHS funding type stuff was ok.

ok, so im going down to the hospital on Monday to have a scan in the EPU.. should i just pop upstairs and see if she is in the FMU?

and are you guys saying that in theory i could ask to be refered to her as my midwife?

Definitely - you trust this Dr and midwife so stick with them if you can as the last thing you need is added stress. Fingers crossed for you.